dieseltaylor Posted May 10, 2011 Share Posted May 10, 2011 Conscripting blokes over 60----this is funny & obviously written by a Former (Australian) Soldier............ I am over 60 and the Defence Force thinks I'm too old to track down terrorists. You can't be older than 42 to join the military. They've got the whole thing arseup. Instead of sending 18-year olds off to fight, they ought to take us old blokes. You shouldn't be able to join a defence unit until you're at least 35. For starters: Researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every 10 seconds. Old blokes only think about sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000 additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy. Young blokes haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier is a dangerous soldier.. 'My back hurts! I can't sleep, I'm tired and hungry'. We are impatient and maybe letting us kill some arsehole that desperately deserves it will make us feel better and shut us up for a while. An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up before 10 am. Old blokes always get up early to pee so what the hell. Besides, like I said, 'I'm tired and can't sleep and since I'm already up, I may as well be up killing some fanatical arsehole. If captured we couldn't spill the beans because we'd forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank and serial number would be a real brainteaser. Training would be easier for old blokes.. We're used to getting screamed and yelled at and we're used to soft food. We've also developed an appreciation for guns. We've been using them for years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from the screaming and yelling. They could lighten up on the obstacle course however. I've been in combat and didn't see a single 20-foot wall with rope hanging over the side, nor did I ever do any push-ups after completing basic training. Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too. I've never seen anyone outrun a bullet. An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still learning to shave, to start up a conversation with a pretty sheila. He still hasn't figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back of his head. He still hasn't worked our that below the hip jeans or shorts will trip him up one way or another. But who said it looks good anyway? Duuuuur These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little more about life before sending them off into harm's way.. Let us old farts track down those dirty rotten coward terrorists. The last thing an enemy would want to see is a couple of million pissed off old farts with attitudes and automatic weapons who know that their best years are already behind them. ***How about recruiting Women over 50 ....in menopause!!! You think Men have attitudes !!! Ohhhhhhhhhhhh my God!!! If nothing else, put them on boat people border patrol in West Australia They will have it secured the first night! Send this to all of your senior friends...it's in big type so they can read it. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Affentitten Posted May 10, 2011 Share Posted May 10, 2011 A grain of truth. But I think the age cut-off to join the ADF is actually 60. Though of course, I can't see them sticking you in the infantry at that age. About 15 or so years ago, part of this rationale was applied to the police force in NSW. Basically there were some issues with 18 year old school bully types walking out of high school and straight into the police academy. This was a particular issue with young guys from the country areas who had basically seen bugger all of life. And suddenly they were in the city having to deal with something like a domestic dispute between two elderly homosexuals. They were also easy prey for older, smarter and much more corrupt police. So they made it compulsory that cops were going to have to do some form of tertiary education. Not just so they could get a nice diploma to hang on their wall, but in the hope that a year or two of college would grow them up a bit and perhaps give them a little more life experience. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Magpie_Oz Posted May 10, 2011 Share Posted May 10, 2011 As a Retired Australian Soldier AND a member of the nearly 50's club I can attest that I am far far meaner and crankier now than at any time in my services years. I agree whole heartedly with the assessment, were do I sign and how quick can they get me outta here? (quick before the wife gets home !) 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
costard Posted May 26, 2011 Share Posted May 26, 2011 Banned in 1, 2, 3... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Affentitten Posted May 26, 2011 Share Posted May 26, 2011 I don't quite get the point of the garbled quotation with the links dropped in. Are they just trying to get click throughs and that's it? Why not use a proper paragraph? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JonS Posted May 26, 2011 Share Posted May 26, 2011 And what about all the people who won't be able to join the community because they're terrible and making helpful and constructive co-- ... oh. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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