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'Evil Men Have No Songs.' How is it That the Peng Challenge is Filled With Song?


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Arrrr! And now, a Scottish Pirate Love Song! Arrr!

I was after a prize

with lust in me eyes

when what should before me I see

but a fair Scottish ship

with some sass to her jib

just a sauntering over the sea

'I'll board her', I cried

And hove along side

she was cutting the waves like a dove

with pomade in me hair

I met her stern stare

And I proffered me piratey love

She smiled most sweetly

and then turned to meet me

Said 'sir Pirate, what would you here?'

I said 'a kiss!

would not be amiss'

And I grappled with ruddy good cheer

'A kiss', she replied

'you shall not be denied'

And she lowered her eyes as if coy

Then she splattered me nose

like a trodden on rose

cried: 'a glasgow kiss for you, boy!'

blinded with pain

and her forceful disdain

I staggered about like a drunk

she brought up her knee

to that part of me

where me legs gathered into me trunk

I fell at her feet

(Even they smelled quite sweet)

And I assumed the fetal position

She put in the boot

they were leather, and cute

and belabored me with her derision

'I love a good pirate

there's none can deny it'

She told me twixt blows to my groin

But I know in my marrow

It'd best be Jack Sparrow

if a kiss they think to purloin

So to pirates wherever

I tell them it's better

to make sure a Scotswoman's willing

Or you'll sail to despair

and the loss of your pair

And she'll sail right on to your killing!

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Originally posted by Seanachai:

Arrrr! And now, a Scottish Pirate Love Song! Arrr!

I was after a prize

with lust in me eyes

when what should before me I see

but a fair Scottish ship

with some sass to her jib

just a sauntering over the sea

'I'll board her', I cried

And hove along side

she was cutting the waves like a dove

with pomade in me hair

I met her stern stare

And I proffered me piratey love

She smiled most sweetly

and then turned to meet me

Said 'sir Pirate, what would you here?'

I said 'a kiss!

would not be amiss'

And I grappled with ruddy good cheer

'A kiss', she replied

'you shall not be denied'

And she lowered her eyes as if coy

Then she splattered me nose

like a trodden on rose

cried: 'a glasgow kiss for you, boy!'

blinded with pain

and her forceful disdain

I staggered about like a drunk

she brought up her knee

to that part of me

where me legs gathered into me trunk

I fell at her feet

(Even they smelled quite sweet)

And I assumed the fetal position

She put in the boot

they were leather, and cute

and belabored me with her derision

'I love a good pirate

there's none can deny it'

She told me twixt blows to my groin

But I know in my marrow

It'd best be Jack Sparrow

if a kiss they think to purloin

So to pirates wherever

I tell them it's better

to make sure a Scotswoman's willing

Or you'll sail to despair

and the loss of your pair

And she'll sail right on to your killing!

Ah! Been taking lessons from Dalem on how to versify?
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Originally posted by Seanachai:

'A kiss', she replied

'you shall not be denied'

And she lowered her eyes as if coy

Then she splattered me nose

like a trodden on rose

cried: 'a glasgow kiss for you, boy!'

blinded with pain

and her forceful disdain

I staggered about like a drunk

she brought up her knee

to that part of me

where me legs gathered into me trunk

I fell at her feet

(Even they smelled quite sweet)

And I assumed the fetal position

She put in the boot

they were leather, and cute

and belabored me with her derision

*sigh*

That was beautiful, that was.

Reminded me of Kitty.

Mace

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Originally posted by Berlichtingen:

Ok, the rose used to be white, but after she beat you with it, it was stained red with your blood

Yeh, they had to surgically remove it.

Took me some time before I wasn't walking with splayed legs afterwards.

Mace

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Spill The Wine

Spill the wine and take that pearl, Spill the wine and take that pearl

Spill the wine and take that pearl, Spill the wine and take that pearl

I was once out strolling one very hot summer's day

When I thought I'd lay myself down to rest

in a big field of tall grass

I lay there in the sun and felt it caressing my face

And I fell asleep and dreamed

I dreamed I was in a Hollywood movie

And that I was the star of the movie

This really blew my mind, the fact that me,

an overfed, long-haired leaping gnome

should be the star of a Hollywood movie

But there I was, I was taken to a place, the hall of the mountain kings

I stood high upon a mountain top, naked to the world

In front of every kind of girl, there was

black ones, round ones, big ones, crazy ones...

Out of the middle came a lady

She whispered in my ear something crazy

She said:

Spill the wine and take that pearl, Spill the wine and take that pearl

Spill the wine and take that pearl, Spill the wine and take that pearl

I thought to myself what could that mean

Am I going crazy or is this just a dream

Now, wait a minute

I know I'm lying in a field of grass somewhere

so it's all in my head

and then.. I heard her say one more time:

Spill the wine and take that pearl, Spill the wine and take that pearl

Spill the wine and take that pearl, Spill the wine and take that pearl

I could feel hot flames of fire roaring at my back

As she disappeared, but soon she returned

In her hand was a bottle of wine, in the other, a glass

She poured some of the wine from the bottle into the glass

And raised it to her lips

And just before she drank it, she said:

Spill the wine and take that pearl, Spill the wine and take that pearl

Spill the wine and take that pearl, Spill the wine and take that pearl

-- Eric Burdon and War

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One Tin Soldier

Listen, children, to a story

That was written long ago,

'Bout a kingdom on a mountain

And the valley-folk below.

On the mountain was a treasure

Buried deep beneath the stone,

And the valley-people swore

They'd have it for their very own.

Go ahead and hate your neighbor,

Go ahead and cheat a friend.

Do it in the name of Heaven,

You can justify it in the end.

There won't be any trumpets blowing

Come the judgement day,

On the bloody morning after....

One tin soldier rides away.

So the people of the valley

Sent a message up the hill,

Asking for the buried treasure,

Tons of gold for which they'd kill.

Came an answer from the kingdom,

"With our brothers we will share

All the secrets of our mountain,

All the riches buried there."

Go ahead and hate your neighbor,

Go ahead and cheat a friend.

Do it in the name of Heaven,

You can justify it in the end.

There won't be any trumpets blowing

Come the judgement day,

On the bloody morning after....

One tin soldier rides away.

Now the valley cried with anger,

"Mount your horses! Draw your sword!"

And they killed the mountain-people,

So they won their just reward.

Now they stood beside the treasure,

On the mountain, dark and red.

Turned the stone and looked beneath it...

"Peace on Earth" was all it said.

Go ahead and hate your neighbor,

Go ahead and cheat a friend.

Do it in the name of Heaven,

You can justify it in the end.

There won't be any trumpets blowing

Come the judgement day,

On the bloody morning after....

One tin soldier rides away.

Go ahead and hate your neighbor,

Go ahead and cheat a friend.

Do it in the name of Heaven,

You can justify it in the end.

There won't be any trumpets blowing

Come the judgement day,

On the bloody morning after....

One tin soldier rides away.

-- Coven

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Sunny Afternoon

The taxman's taken all my dough

and left me in my stately home

lazing on a sunny afternoon.

And I can't sail my yacht

he's taken ev'rything I've got;

all I've got's this sunny afternoon.

Save me

save me

save me from this squeeze

I've got a big fat momma tyin' to break me.

And I love to live so pleasantly

live this life of luxury:

lazing on a sunny afternoon

in Summertime

in summertime

in summertime.

My girlfriend's gone off with my car

and gone back to her ma and pa

telling tales of drunkenness and cruelty.

Now I'm sitting here

sipping at my icecold beer

lazing on a sunny afternoon.

Help me

help me

help me sail away

you give me two good reasons why I ought to stay.

'Cos I love to live so pleasantly

live this life of luxury:

lazing on a sunny afternoon

in Summertime

in summertime

in summertime.

-- The Kinks

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Originally posted by Speedy:

You can crash here tonight just so long as you bring enough assorted alcohol for everyone.

I have a two year old bottle of schnapps that's still one-third full. I drink slowly. Well wouldn't you drink slowly too if the strongest thing you had in the house was schnapps?

Michael

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Originally posted by Michael Emrys:

I cooked up a pork roast night before last and ate hugely of it.

Last night's experiment...

Ok, this is for a crock pot, and the amounts are what I used (and it fills a 6 qt crock pot)... smaller batches are doable

4 pounds Pork Loin (cut into 1" squares)

1 Onion (chopped)

3 Bell Peppers (cut into whatever size you like... I did about 1" hunks)

3 Tomatos (again, cut to prefered size... I did about 1" hunks)

3 tsp salt

4 tsp Paprika (Hungarian... Spanish is just red food coloring)

1 cup Sour Cream

Water

Into the crock pot goes the pork. Add water, but don't cover the pork... if you do, you'll get soup (I did, and that wasn't necessarily a bad thing). Over the pork add the onions, peppers, tomatos, salt & paprika. Cook on low for 10 hours. About a half hour before its done add the sour cream and stir it in. Serve on noodles, rice, Spatzel or Hungarian dumplings

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Originally posted by **YK2**:

*Munches on her weetabix and sliced banana*

Ugh! Get away from my table with that...that...HEALTHY FOOD DAMMIT!!! What are you trying to do, kill me by delivering a shock to my system? Quick, Macie, first aid! Beer! Even one of those awful Aussie beers! Anything! ARRRRGGGGHHHH!!!

Michael

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Time for a stoner anthem...

Don't Step On The Grass, Sam

Staring at the boob tube

Turning up the big nob

Trying to find life in the wasteland

Searching for a program

Gonna deal with mary jane

Ready for a trip to the head land

Obnoxious Joe comes on the screen

Along with his guest self-rightous SAM

Some old guy who doesn't count

His hair and clothes are much to out

Pushin' back his glasses

SAM says

He was elected by the masses

With that in mind

He starts to unwind

A viscous attack upon the grasses

It's mean and evil, wicked and nasty

Don't step on the grass, SAM

It will ruin our fair country

Don't be such an ass, SAM

It will hook your sons and daughters

Your so full of ****, SAM

All will pay who disagree with me

Disinformation Joe and SAM

Feedin' it to the nation

But the one that didn't count

Counted'em out

Exposing all their false quotations

Faced by an awkward situation

It's all they had to save the day

It's mean and evil, wicked and nasty

Don't step on the grass, SAM

It will ruin our fair country

Don't be such an ass, SAM

It will hook your sons and daughters

Your so full of ****, SAM

All will pay who disagree with me

Please give up you already lost the fight alright

You waste my coin, SAM all you can

To jail my fellow man

For smokin' of the noble weed

You need much more than him

Youv'e been telling lies so long

Some believe they're true

So they close there eyes to things

They have no right to do

Just as soon as you are gone

Hope will start to climb

Please don't wait around to long

Your wastin' prescious time

It's mean and evil, wicked and nasty

Don't step on the grass, SAM

It will ruin our fair country

Don't be such an ass, SAM

It will hook your sons and daughters

Your so full of ****, SAM

All will pay who disagree with me

Please give up you already lost the fight alright

-- Steppenwolf

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Originally posted by Michael Emrys:

Well wouldn't you drink slowly too if the strongest thing you had in the house was schnapps?

Michael

If the only thing I had in the house was a two year old bottle of schnapps, I'd either take my own life, or wait for the college of cardinals to announce my assumption of the papacy.

You've got my vote when that idiot John Paul kacks, Michael.

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Originally posted by Michael Emrys:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by **YK2**:

...but GARLIC, PEPPERS, ONIONS, AND FRIED POTATOES!!!!!!!! and for brekkie... *eek*

*Shudder*

Well, perhaps a nice plate of tacos then? Yum! I love Mexican food for breakfast.

Michael </font>

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Originally posted by Mace:

She put in the boot

they were leather, and cute

*sigh*

That was beautiful, that was.

Reminded me of Kitty.

Mace

*Smack*

He said cute boots, not tackety boots!!!

*claws Maces eyes out*

Now that SHOULD remind you of..... well, it should remind you!

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