Seanachai Posted September 9, 2001 Share Posted September 9, 2001 I almost never make the Mad Bald One lock up a thread. But, in keeping with the Peng Challenge Thread, the Thread of the New Millenium, Rudyard Kipling, and the 'need to make clear what we are all about': The Young Cesspool Squire WHEN the Scum Sucking Newbie goes out to the 'Pool 'E acts like a pillock an' 'e posts like a fool, An' 'e weeps because others are frequently cruel And 'e's not fit to serve as a squire. Serve, serve, serve as a squire, Serve, serve, serve as a squire, Serve, serve, serve as a squire, Squire of the Cesspool! Now all you serfs what's drafted to-day, You shut up your cake-hole an' 'ark to my lay, An' I'll sing you a squire as far as I may: A squire what's fit for a 'Pooler. Fit, fit, fit for a squire Fit, fit, fit for a squire Fit, fit, fit for a squire Squire of the Cesspool! First mind you steer clear o' the 'general' taunt, that labels you stupid, useless, and naught -- that shows to the world that you cannot be taught -- An' it's bad for the young Cesspool Squire. Bad, bad, bad for the squire Bad, bad, bad for the squire Bad, bad, bad for the squire Squire of the Cesspool When comes the laughter -- as it will past a doubt -- don't pose and don't preen, and don't go on the shout, For the 'Pool will just sneer, and spit yer arse out, An' it crumples the young Cesspool Squire. Crum-, crum-, crumples the squire Crum-, crum-, crumples the squire Crum-, crum-, crumples the squire Squire of the Cesspool But the worst o' your foes is the other young fools: who'll be set on yer arse, by the powers that rule: they'll send you out battles that make you look like a tool, An' you'll die like a fool of a squire. Fool, fool, fool of a squire Fool, fool, fool of a squire Fool, fool, fool of a squire Squire of the Cesspool If you're belittled and spat on, completely ignored, Don't piss and don't moan, and return to the Board; Be witty and tough, and amusement afford Then it's beer for the young Cesspool Squire. Beer, beer, beer for the squire Beer, beer, beer for the squire Beer, beer, beer for the squire Squire of the Cesspool Now, if you should find a Knight notices your worth and offers to sponsor your place on this earth and offers your pain up to give others mirth, Know that mirth is enough for a squire. 'Nough, 'nough, 'nough for a squire 'Nough, 'nough, 'nough for a squire 'Nough, 'nough, 'nough for a squire Squire of the Cesspool Your Knight's foes will curse you, and laugh at your pain your Knight will laugh too, and you'll feel there's no gain and you'll curse all the 'Pool, and call it insane, An' you'll then know the curse of a squire. Curse, curse, curse of a squire Curse, curse, curse of a squire Curse, curse, curse of a squire Squire of the Cesspool When you first go to taunt, you'll probably suck, And the Knights will run over your arse like a truck, Be thankful you're livin', and trust to your luck And march to new taunts like a squire. Taunt, taunt, taunt like a squire Taunt, taunt, taunt like a squire Taunt, taunt, taunt like a squire Squire of the Cesspool! When 'arf of your taunts fly wide and go wrong, Don't revert to expletives or ****e jokes, you nong; Just buckle down lad, and get set for sing-song, the song of a young Cesspool squire. song, song, song for a squire song, song, song for a squire song, song, song for a squire Squire of the Cesspool And if you should finally arrive as a Knight having taunted and held on and fought the good fight then remember to make the new squires wade through ****e Cause ****e is what makes a good squire, ****e, ****e, ****e for a squire ****e, ****e, ****e for a squire ****e, ****e, ****e for a squire Squire of the Cesspool You're no longer a squire, and now you're a Knight, you've learned how to taunt, and mock, and make light of all of the bastards who once gave you ****e and hate like a young Cesspool squire. hate, hate, hate like a squire hate, hate, hate like a squire hate, hate, hate like a squire Squire of the Cesspool When you're wounded and left in the Cesspool of Peng, And the bastards come out to cut up what remains, Jest roll to the taunt and blow out their brains An' go to your Gawd like a Knight. Go, go, go like a knight, Go, go, go like a knight, Go, go, go like a knight, Knight of the Cesspool! Dedicated to Hiram Sedai. A Squire and Knight of the Cesspool. [ 09-09-2001: Message edited by: Seanachai ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mace Posted September 9, 2001 Share Posted September 9, 2001 and when the bald one's a-going to see your post he'll be doing a-something to annoy you the most he'll be locking this down, makin' it toast and making you look the fool Sean, Sean, Seanachai fool Sean, Sean, Seanachai fool Sean, Sean, Seanachai fool now run back to the cesspool Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Dorosh Posted September 9, 2001 Share Posted September 9, 2001 Her name was Lola, she was a showgirl With yellow feathers in her hair and a dress cut down to there She would merengue and do the cha-cha But while she tried to be a star, Tony always tended bar Across the crowded floor, he worked from 8 til 4 They were young and they had each other Who could ask for more? At the Copa (CO!), Copacabana (Copacabana) The hottest spot north of Havana (here) At the Copa (CO!), Copacabana Music and passion were always in fashion At the Copa....they fell in love. His name was Rico. He wore a diamond. He was escorted to his chair, he saw Lola dancing there And when she finished, he called her over, But Rico went a bit to far, Tony sailed across the bar And then the punches flew and chairs were smashed in two There was blood and a single gun shot But just who shot who? At the Copa (CO!), Copacabana (Copacabana) The hottest spot north of Havana (here) At the Copa (CO!), Copacabana Music and passion were always in fashion At the Copa....she lost her love. Copa... Copacabana... music and passion... always the fashion... Her name was Lola, she was a showgirl, But that was 30 years ago, when they used to have a show. Now it's a disco, but not for Lola, Still in the dress she used to wear, Faded feathers in her hair. She sits there so refined, and drinks herself half-blind. She lost her youth and she lost her Tony, Now she's lost her mind! At the Copa (CO!), Copacabana (Copacabana) The hottest spot north of Havana (here) At the Copa (CO!), Copacabana Music and passion were always in fashion At the Copa....don't fall in love. [ 09-09-2001: Message edited by: Michael Dorosh ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CMplayer Posted September 9, 2001 Share Posted September 9, 2001 When I say Hi Mom there's a good chance she's actually reading. She was just visiting and took a surprising interest in CM, even looking over my shoulder while I plotted moves. I'm sure it's thanks to her help I'm winning all my pbems right now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Aitken Posted September 9, 2001 Share Posted September 9, 2001 Millennium has two n's you twat! Call yourself a pretend Briton? [Edited because I thought of two things to say!] [ 09-09-2001: Message edited by: David Aitken ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CMplayer Posted September 9, 2001 Share Posted September 9, 2001 This game is screwing up my head. Check out this picture: I tried clicking on it at Feldgrau to get stats on its weaponry, max speed, armor etc. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Aitken Posted September 9, 2001 Share Posted September 9, 2001 You don't know what a PzKpfw I is, even when it has two handsome young chaps with silly hats on sitting on it with a look in their eyes which just screams "look at my shiny new PzKpfw I, which is armed with two MG34 machineguns, has 7-13mm armour and a maximum speed of 23mph, and later in the war was adapted as a chassis for command tanks and artillery pieces"? You, you, anti-grog! Get back to the Peng Thread, I'm sure they'll welcome you back after your daring exploits. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Aitken Posted September 9, 2001 Share Posted September 9, 2001 Oh, and it's an initial variant (model A), with four roadwheels and a rear idler in contact with the ground. Later models have a longer chassis and more powerful engine. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CMplayer Posted September 9, 2001 Share Posted September 9, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by David Aitken: and later in the war was adapted as a chassis for command tanks and artillery pieces"? You, you, anti-grog!<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Wasn't that the Pz Kpfw II that later in the war was adapted as a chassis for all that? IIRC all the Pz Kpfw I's broke on the way to the Sudetenland so they were adapted as pilsner and sausage haulers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CMplayer Posted September 9, 2001 Share Posted September 9, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by David Aitken: Later models have a longer chassis and more powerful engine.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Was that the Wanker engine, the Krapp or the Maybach? And were the later models also built on British-made chassis? Thx for sharing, you fount of knowledge you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Aitken Posted September 9, 2001 Share Posted September 9, 2001 The original Krupp engine was replaced by a Maybach. I can't imagine any part of the tank was British, but it did copy some features of the Carden-Loyd light tanks. The chassis was used for sIG 33 SPGs, PzBefw Is, Panzerjäger Is and maybe others. Their career as the PanzerWurstWagen came to a sudden halt on September 11th 1942 when a convoy was ambushed by Hurricane fighter-bombers on a rhubarb mission and Hitler demanded a more secure method of bringing him his dinner. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
von shrad Posted September 9, 2001 Share Posted September 9, 2001 Originally enlightened by Seanachi; <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR> WHEN the Scum Sucking Newbie goes out to the 'Pool 'E acts like a pillock an' 'e posts like a fool, An' 'e weeps because others are frequently cruel And 'e's not fit to serve as a squire... <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> That was beautiful. Made me weep shortly after I hurled my lunch all over my keyboard. Quite a compliment from a former Piss-Boy and lifetime Squire 'ya know. Didn't the Kingston Trio do this song though....or was it Johnny Cash? A Boy Named Seanamook. von shrad BTW...please start taking your lithium again. You're scaring the newbies and children. There you go....all better now. 1 more...that's it....Good Psycho. Ataboy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CMplayer Posted September 9, 2001 Share Posted September 9, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by David Aitken: I can't imagine any part of the tank was British, but it did copy some features of the Carden-Loyd light tanks.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> I don't suppose Guderian's opinion matters but he writes: <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally written by the dude with the coolest mustache ever, Heinz Guderian ...we had to build a training tank. The Carden-Loyd chassis, which we purchased in England, was suited to this purpose. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> I guess that just means they copied the chassis. [ 09-09-2001: Message edited by: CMplayer ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark IV Posted September 9, 2001 Share Posted September 9, 2001 Alas, poor CMplayer, neither grog nor 'pooler, but compelled to post nonetheless by some inner torment. As any schoolchild knows, almost all production PzIs were produced with Maybach engines, and the ZF Zaphon FG 31 transmission. The PzI chassis was the basis for the sig 33 and other production combat vehicles and utility vehicles, including the well known 4.7cm PaK (t)(Sfl) auf Pz Kw I Ausf B. The (t), of course, indicates that the vehicle was completely manufactured of tungsten*. The PzII chassis was a completely different animal*. And often unsung by the "Cat"-lovers and would-be uberpanzer groupies, there were over 1400 of these bad boys in the attack on Poland, over 500 against France, and they were still in service when Barbarossa rolled around. *<FONT size="1">You Idiot.</Font> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Aitken Posted September 9, 2001 Share Posted September 9, 2001 Presumably they bought a Carden-Loyd, liked what they saw, and copied the design. The Illustrated Directory Of Tanks Of The World (David Miller/Christopher Foss) says "plagiarised". I think it's the Russians who bought various tanks from around the world and copied the best one. They ended up making the best job of the American Christie chassis, what we (the British) had and didn't make such a good job of). The Germans, on the other hand, took various armour doctrines from around the world and copied the best one (British), and used it to beat us at our own game. I'm 4/5ths of the way through Guderian's Achtung Panzer just now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CMplayer Posted September 9, 2001 Share Posted September 9, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Mark IV: Alas, poor CMplayer, neither grog nor 'pooler, but compelled to post nonetheless by some inner torment. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> The inner torment called I brought home a large pile of work this weekend. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Aitken Posted September 9, 2001 Share Posted September 9, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Mark IV wrote: The (t), of course, indicates that the vehicle was completely manufactured of tungsten*.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Those wacky Germans. I learned here a few months ago that the Tiger II was fashioned by Göring himself out of solid concrete. I'll bet the Russian AT mine designers were having panic attacks about getting their magnetic weapons to stick. Their solution has endured to this day and is widely available by its German name, Blu-TaK, or Blümmentritt Tank-Kannone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seanachai Posted September 10, 2001 Author Share Posted September 10, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Michael Dorosh: Her name was Lola, she was a showgirl... [ 09-09-2001: Message edited by: Michael Dorosh ]<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Mockery I expect, as mockery is the Peng Challenge Threaders daily bread. Abuse, I hold at naught, for abuse is the very air a Cesspooler breathes. Even childishness and idiocy I would accept with equanimity, for I expect nothing better from most of you. But this, sir, this I will hold no truck with. To post Manilow lyrics, unmodified, and in their entirety, is disgusting in a way that is hard to bear. There is a special place in hell prepared for you this evening. You were designated, at birth, I'm sure, to die either on the gallows, or of some loathsome disease. And, to paraphrase Disraeli, I will not be sharing your fate, sir, for I decline to embrace either your prinicipals, or your mistress. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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