speedbump2
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Posts posted by speedbump2
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Counting is really not your forte, is it? I return a file every evening. I don't do more because I don't want to overwhelm your laughable decision making talents (If that word even applies to you).
Correct: laughable does not apply. See Boo, if you scrunch your face up really hard, you too can think.
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I do like the way you use your artillery, though.
It's very creative... Shell lots of open ground and hope something wanders by... did you see the HT sail straight through?
I did...more proof of your hackage...I think your troops were sunning in the back of the HT with no cares in the world...
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Just how hard must it be for your Pixeltruppen. Not only are they facing the might of the German Army, ably led by my Superior Skilz... but you can't even hit a Panther hiding behind just one tree? That's right folks, he hit the tree with his first shot. As you can guess, there was no second shot. And now his infantry are charging across open ground to the vodka supplies as my tanks advance. Just wait until the flame haltracks come over the ridge like avenging Indians.
Noba.
(I would suggest that you stick to golf, but you are most likely to useless at that, as well).
Actually he was almost out of AP rounds after destroying your entire right flank. He was ready for the Vodka anyway....
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Well, this has been a fine welcome back for the Prodigal Son (read speedbump2)! :
A) Noba has somehow hacked the game so that in one turn 1) my Sturmkovic attacked a knocked out Studebaker 2) the only casualties caused by my 152mm barrage was my own HQ unit, which was buried in the middle of the forest and 3) one of my reinforcements wandered off the map, never to be seen again. The gamey bastige is right where I want him...
ii) Boo has set up a game with the sum total of One (1) (uno) (un) (single) (less than two) platoons on each side, and can still only return one turn every two days...great staff work. He is ready to lose...
3) Nidan1 is quietly absorbing the beating only a company of Shermans can dish out. I will likely waltz across his troops bodies....
While I despise all who reside here, with the noble exception of my Liege Sir Joe Shaw and the he up-and-coming Squire sburke, I enjoy rolling over your pixelated troops...
speedbump2
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Actually as much as I am a mere squire, I must uphold the teachings of my liege Joe Shaw Knight Champion of the M.B.T., Justicar for Life of the Peng Challenge Thread, Creator of the Peng Challenge Thread Podcast, CessPool Drain Commissioner and Founder of the Shavian House. My learned colleague speedbump was incorrect in his statement "Boo Radley seems to think". Boo is incapable of thought. He is comparable to that dead frog in biology class your teacher had you apply battery leads to in order to understand muscle movement. The leg moved, however Boo the frog is still brain dead. Perhaps I am mistaken and speedbump only meant to show what a thinking person might do and how Boo was a pale imitation of that, in which case I withdraw my objection.
sburke, you are no doubt correct. My assumption was that Boo Radley had developed conscious thought in the 10 years that I have been absent. My optimism was clearly misplaced. I should have realized it when I smelled that odor of corruption, only partly covered by the formaldehyde. Dead frog indeed...
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Michael,
I think you need to run the "Activate New Products.sh" script, which is found under the CM Battle for Normandy\Documents file\Activate New Products.sh.
I bought the big bundle, but I had to use this to update with the 3.11 patch. You probably need to run this twice and add each of the module keys.
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I awake to the New Year full of optimism and hope...until I come here and realize that I am surrounded by a miasma of ineptitude and ignorance.
However, things are looking up. Steve G. was able to solve my registration issue which allows me to fully whoop my opponents in France and Belgium.
Updates:
1) Noba is streaming hordes of Cats and funny six-wheeled contraptions across the fields of Russia towards my thin brown line of supply troops. Luckily, the Luftwaffe can't tell Grey from Brown and bombed his setup zone. Not to worry, however, as I am armed with numerous 7 foot long anti-tank rifles and these will do short work of the enemy.
B ) Boo Radley seems to think that holidays are not days to return numerous turns. Clearly fearful of crossing rivers in the face of my elite stormtroopers, I await his tentative first steps.
iii) Nidan1, with my install issues eliminated, your primary hope of not losing has evaporated. Prepare to be swarmed under by my conscripted yanks.
speedbump2
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I'd like to express my usual disdain and disgust at the majority of you present, excepting of course the THREE members of the Shavian House who grace our humble abode and lend some class to an otherwise undistinguished gathering. I'd like to but the holiday spirit has once again taken hold and I'm obliged therefore to wish you all ...
A Rollicking Ragnarok!
Joe
That's it Sir Joe, have it roll right over these miscreants....
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And existence does not equal validity and validity does not equal thruth.
And just because you say it is not true, does not make it....no that doesn't sound right...let's see. You sound untruthy? No, no how do I say this....
You are wrong. Ah, that's it. That's correct. Obviously redundant, but true.
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Said no one ever.
Which raises an existential question. By quoting "House of Shavian wins again!!" you implicitly recognize its existence. Further by implication, if you recognize its existence, you recognize its validity. Therefore, if you recognize its validity, you recognize its truth!
This logic is further supported by Renee Descarte's "Ergo Sum". I think, therefore I am. Conscious recognition of the fact (House of Shavian wins again) leads directly to its existence...rather simple actually.
Speedbump2
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Benn taking lessons from OFJ, I see.
Noba.
Benn, who is Benn?
Been taking spelling lessons at House Rune I see.
I am conflicted. Rushing home from a family dinner, desperate to respond to Noba, I feel I should be upset that sburke beat me to the punch. But a sense of pride creeps in, knowing that the House of Shavian wins again!!
speedbump2
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Hows about piffling that CMBN install there Sparky.....we all have it up and running. Perhaps your great mentor and ruler of House Shavian. Joe Shaw could provide you some assistance. If he can get his fingers out of his nose long enough to tap the keyboard.
Sir Joe Shaw, to you sir. I will have you know the leader of House Shavian is busy with the contemplation of "Grognards vs. Aussies: which is the most repulsive". He cannot deign to listen to the likes of you...
In the meantime, I am held hostage to the members of Battlefront's helpdesk and their Post Birth of Christ/Pre Year Rollover festivities. Either that, or they just had their eyes checked and with dilated pupils cannot focus on the screen...
So while we wait, I encourage you to consider the relative merits of the American Mark 3d Mess Tin to the German SdK Kochgeschirr...
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Seems like after ten years away from the forums he has also forgotten how to use a computer or follow simple instructions.
Perhaps he was taken away in a rendition and has spent the last ten years in a dark hole in Diego Garcia or some other place where normal human contact is withdrawn.
Only recently released in Barack Obama's, "Lets let all the bad guys go free campaign"
I find it hard to believe that I am being accused of technical ignorance when I have two installs, two patches and a specific ditty to whistle to get the game fully up and running (nothing personal Battlefront - great game, thrilled to be back), when those in the Outreboards are complaining about their middle mouse button not working in the forum (they should speak to the Aussies, I hear they use the middle button to short cut to Pron...)!!
Piffle, I say...piffle.
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He's of the Shavian House. They're well known for their lame excuses for avoiding game play.
Interesting. You "say" you have sent me a dropbox invite...none received. I have sent you a dropbox invite...no response. Who is avoiding who, I say!!!
A lamer excuse to avoid mortal combat has never been spoken.
Oh, I don't know. Boo's Jeeps vs. Kubelwagens scenario was pretty lame....
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Ok, which one of you gamey bastiges corrupted my install?!?! Here I come, like the prodigal son personified, returned to the Pool, only to have my game tell me, "You need to have the Market Garden module, you dunce." Now having purchased the "Big Bundle", which includes said module, and played a number of turns, I can only suspect that one of you have made off with my module. The obvious suspect would be Boo Radley, with the dunce reference, but the Aussies have the animal cunning (not intelligence, mind you, but like rats surviving any disaster) to throw him under the bus.
I will give you all 2 hours to return my module, no questions asked. After that, well.....you will be sorry.
speedbump2
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can't you two go back to playing with yourselves...and I mean that in all senses of the expression.
Now, now, sburke let's stay on the high road. For the Justicar would expect nothing less of us. I understand the frustration of dealing with the lesser houses (lower case on purpose). Now run along and research "Aussies, naturally ignorant or brain damaged due to hanging off the bottom of the earth?" I would say 3,000 words would be sufficient...
speedbump2
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Gawd!, this mutual admiration society is quite sickening, as if these twits had anything worth admiring. At least now Shaw has some of his imbecilic progeny to keep him company in his dotage.
But I digress......speedbump old sod, welcome back....would you prefer a thrashing in CMBN or parts East? I have sent you a PM. Do you still know how to use the forum after 10 years?
Nidan1, a response is in your PM box. State your preferences...
Boo, rather than spend the entire day searching for antiquated art, respond to my request for terms...of course, you are probably confused and would offer Jeeps vs. Kubelwagens...again.
sburke, ignore the pathetic mewlings of babes. They are houseless, classless, and just less...
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Welcome Home my lad, it is good to see you Sir Speedbump and the Shavian House will always be your home away from home. In fact I believe we still have your old desk in the attic. You remember the one that you scratched a crude figure of a woman with an arrow pointing toward her and the inscription ... "Speedbump goes here"? For old times sake I could likely lay on a three hour seminar on the subject of "Nidan1, a Really Stupid Name or What?" Or perhaps you'd like to take a shot at presenting "Australians, You Really CAN Live Somewhere Else" ... I'm sure that Our Most Loyal and Trustworthy Squire sburke would appreciate your insight.
Thank you Sir Joe for the welcome. The House is looking as warm and inviting as ever. Let me wipe my muddy boots on Boo Radley's coat and share a pint with you and Squire sburke.
I remember your assignments fondly. My favorites included "Michael Emrys, inspiration for Churchill's 'A modest little person, with much to be modest about'" and "The Cesspool, If idiots could fly, this would be an airport".
Squire sburke, might I suggest research into "dalem: The cream rises to the top. So does the scum." I think the conclusion is obvious, but it will teach you to consolidate volumes of supporting data....
speedbump2
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Good Grief.... first post back and it's crawling to OFJ like a lonely puppy when it's master comes home. No doubt you made a mess in your favourite corner of the house, again. Wait until your master rubs your nose in it. Again. (As if OFJ can be the master of anyone).
Since you have come poncing back where do you get off expecting files? The Statute of Limitations (In your case "Extreme Limitations") requires you to requalify as an idiot. Your previous competency in this area, whilst noted, means that it a given - but you should still apply.
Send a file.
Noba.
My good Noba (and I won't even attempt to translate that as Nooba..no, no too easy), the recognition of Sir Joe Shaw upon my return is nothing more than recognizing my superior in the Shavian House. Clearly this is a concept that should be instinctual to you as everyone is your superior....
File will be on the way soonest...
Speedbump2
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Another is publicly admitting to be a "Proud alumni of the Shavian House". Why don't you just write down "Blithering idiot". Same thing, really.
Jealousy does not become you.
One must be proud of one's genealogy and heraldry. Of course, when one's line is made up of court jesters and and night soil collectors, it must be difficult...
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Billy Goat Curse? At least you aren't putting any of the blame of The Curse of Rocky Colavito on my shoulders.
One sign of senility is the use of random italics....
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Yes, I am still in N. E. Ohio. Who else will have me?
So that is what has kept my Real Estate value suppressed this last 10 years...I should have known.
I suppose your presence makes you our very own Billy Goat curse.... http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Curse_of_the_Billy_Goat
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I seem to recollect now........the Shavian House requires bloviation from its members, as practiced to the fullest extent by its current senior member Shaw. I see that you haven't forgotten his teachings. The young lad sburke {spelt not bolded} also dutifully following in his footsteps by issuing long senseless streams of word diarrhea.
Keep it brief, keep it pithy.
Well, you did keep it brief...1 for 2!! Not a bad hit rate!
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Kiss ass!
I prefer to view it as:
1) The proper welcome to a returning hero
2) The natural extension to the lineage of the Shavian House
3) An extremely long response from you. When complete, did you need a nap?
The Peng Challenge: Thread Blunder
in Combat Mission Red Thunder
Posted
It is clear to me in my short time back that the MBT, our Cesspool, has become more infested with malodorous Aussies than ever before. This is unacceptable.
sburke, in our Liege's absence, I must assign you more work. You are hereby tasked with researching the proper way of extirpating an Aussie. I suspect that to force them to release their roots, you will have to offer them cheap beer or an ugly sheep. Maybe get a sheep's head caught in a fence. Get to work...
Updates:
Nidan1 has clearly taken hacking lessons from Noba, as my lead tank is spinning in circles intimidated by a short shrub and a roll of barbed wire. Needless to say, I am about to win.
Boo Radley appears to be marshaling the entire 1st Infantry Division (based on the number of sighting icons) to assault my river ford. I am not worried as my squad and a half of Polish conscripts, dragooned into the Wermacht's labor battalions, is ready to repel the Yanks. Needless to say, I am about to win.
Noba is advancing with 1944's entire production run of Panthers against my battalion of dismounted truck drivers. May he get sand in his computer while at the beach. Needless to say, I am about to win.
speedbump2