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Sledge59

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Posts posted by Sledge59

    Pass the Lotion Peng, I need to get that full body Mutha Beautiful Challenge Tan

    in Combat Mission Archive #4 (2002)

    Posted

    Originally posted by Joe Shaw:

    In the words of the heroine of "Who Shot Roger Rabitt", the applicant must be one of whom we can all say "He makes me laugh!"

    C'mon, Joe. Don't be such a stuffed-shirt-stick-in-the-mud! They let you in here didn't they? Persephone is right to bring this up.

    Let me spell it out for you: AussieJeff makes me laugh.

    [ March 17, 2002, 06:41 PM: Message edited by: Sledge59 ]

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    Pass the Lotion Peng, I need to get that full body Mutha Beautiful Challenge Tan

    in Combat Mission Archive #4 (2002)

    Posted

    For MrSpkr:

    Two boys are playing football at this park in a small town in Texas when one of the boys is suddenly attacked by a crazed Rottweiler.

    Thinking quickly, the other boy takes a stick and shoves it under the dog's collar, twists it, and breaks the dog's neck, thus saving his friend.

    A sports reporter who was strolling by sees the incident and rushes over to interview the boy. He tells the boy he's going to write the story and says, "I'll title it 'Young Longhorn Fan Saves Friend From Vicious Animal'".

    "But I'm not a Longhorn fan", the little hero replies.

    "Sorry, since we're in Texas, I just assumed you were", says the reporter and he starts writing again.

    He asks "How does 'Aggie Fan Rescues Friend From Horrific Attack' sound?"

    "I'm not an Aggie fan either", the boy says.

    "Oh, I thought everyone in Texas was either for the Aggies or the Longhorns. What team do you root for?", the reporter asks.

    "I'm just visiting my cousin, I'm a Oklahoma Sooner fan", the boy replies. "They're

    just the best!"

    The reporter smiles, starts a new sheet in his notebook, and writes: "Little Redneck Bastard From Oklahoma Kills Beloved Family Pet".

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    Pass the Lotion Peng, I need to get that full body Mutha Beautiful Challenge Tan

    in Combat Mission Archive #4 (2002)

    Posted

    Originally posted by Boo_Radley:

    Not even close, Laddie. I'll have you know that I minored in gibberish in high school. What he actually is attempting to say is, "If someone would please give me my car keys, I can go look for my pants ." It's either that or a coded message for help.

    I suppose you're one of those critics who stands on a soap box next to a Jackson Pollock painting making obscene gestures at anyone who disagrees with your narrow-minded interpretation of what the artist meant in the first place.... HMMMMM?
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    Pass the Lotion Peng, I need to get that full body Mutha Beautiful Challenge Tan

    in Combat Mission Archive #4 (2002)

    Posted

    Where is Mark Ant... err Marlow on the Ides of March?

    Peng: Who is it in the press that calls on me?

    I hear a tongue shriller than all the music

    Cry "Peng!" Speak. Peng is turned to hear.

    Soothsayer: Beware the ides of March.

    Peng: What man is that?

    Chrisl: A soothsayer bids you beware the ides of March.

    Peng: Set him before me; let me see his face.

    Croda: Fellow, come from the throng; look upon Peng.

    Peng: What say'st thou to me now? Speak once again.

    Soothsayer: Beware the ides of March.

    Peng: He is a dreamer. Let us leave him. Pass.

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    Pass the Lotion Peng, I need to get that full body Mutha Beautiful Challenge Tan

    in Combat Mission Archive #4 (2002)

    Posted

    Ladies and Gentlemen of the CessPool,

    I give you Literature.

    I give you Architecture.

    I give you Privies!

    Henry Wimbush took up the thread of his interrupted discourse.

    "All that you say, my dear Scogan," he began, "is certainly very

    just, very true. But whether Sir Ferdinando shared your views

    about architecture or if, indeed, he had any views about

    architecture at all, I very much doubt. In building this house,

    Sir Ferdinando was, as a matter of fact, preoccupied by only one

    thought--the proper placing of his privies. Sanitation was the

    one great interest of his life. In 1573 he even published, on

    this subject, a little book--now extremely scarce--called,

    'Certaine Priuy Counsels' by 'One of Her Maiestie's Most

    Honourable Priuy Counsels, F.L. Knight', in which the whole

    matter is treated with great learning and elegance. His guiding

    principle in arranging the sanitation of a house was to secure

    that the greatest possible distance should separate the privy

    from the sewage arrangements. Hence it followed inevitably that

    the privies were to be placed at the top of the house, being

    connected by vertical shafts with pits or channels in the ground.

    It must not be thought that Sir Ferdinando was moved only by

    material and merely sanitary considerations; for the placing of

    his privies in an exalted position he had also certain excellent

    spiritual reasons. For, he argues in the third chapter of his

    'Priuy Counsels', the necessities of nature are so base and

    brutish that in obeying them we are apt to forget that we are the

    noblest creatures of the universe. To counteract these degrading

    effects he advised that the privy should be in every house the

    room nearest to heaven, that it should be well provided with

    windows commanding an extensive and noble prospect, and that the

    walls of the chamber should be lined with bookshelves containing

    all the ripest products of human wisdom, such as the Proverbs of

    Solomon, Boethius's 'Consolations of Philosophy', the apophthegms

    of Epictetus and Marcus Aurelius, the 'Enchiridion' of Erasmus,

    and all other works, ancient or modern, which testify to the

    nobility of the human soul. In Crome he was able to put his

    theories into practice. At the top of each of the three

    projecting towers he placed a privy. From these a shaft went

    down the whole height of the house, that is to say, more than

    seventy feet, through the cellars, and into a series of conduits

    provided with flowing water tunnelled in the ground on a level

    with the base of the raised terrace. These conduits emptied

    themselves into the stream several hundred yards below the fish-

    pond. The total depth of the shafts from the top of the towers

    to their subterranean conduits was a hundred and two feet. The

    eighteenth century, with its passion for modernisation, swept

    away these monuments of sanitary ingenuity. Were it not for

    tradition and the explicit account of them left by Sir

    Ferdinando, we should be unaware that these noble privies had

    ever existed. We should even suppose that Sir Ferdinando built

    his house after this strange and splendid model for merely

    aesthetic reasons."

    Aldous Huxley

    Crome Yellow

    Can you imagine it? Cess castle simply must have privies in the tops of the towers!

    Note: SSN’s and other assorted cockroaches may read but NOT comment.

    Sledge

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    I have come to bury Peng, not to Challenge him

    in Combat Mission Archive #4 (2002)

    Posted

    AussieJeff,

    I've discovered what makes you tick! Yes, you're one of those mod artists from way back in the dark ages of early last year. I must say that your work looks terribly dry, desert dry. Obviously playing you would carry the danger that you might suck all the water out of my pixel warriors before returning a file, yet I've got an anti-mod worked up that'll give you fits! Prepare for your punishment, silly madcap.

    Sledge

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    I have come to bury Peng, not to Challenge him

    in Combat Mission Archive #4 (2002)

    Posted

    Those in the ‘Pool who have never tried the Random Battle Generator should give it a test drive sometime; it’s a blast. This handy little program doesn’t give a rip about mamby pamby crap like ‘game balance’ or ‘fair play’. When coupled with computer picked forces, it offers some of the most exciting QB action in CM. You take what you get and deal with it, kinda like the real thing. Scenario designers should be a little jealous of this utility, for players don’t whine about its choices.

    Yep, I played Leeo Again. It was easily the most thrilling first 7 turns I’ve ever played. Defending against the assault is always a challenge, and Leeo had 12 pieces of supported armor to throw at a company of French infantry with their single M4 and lone Greyhound. The mines got 2, the Greyhound got 1, zooks claimed 2 more, and the brave little Sherman that could bagged 4 invading AFVs all by its lonesome before the optics got splattered with the tank commanders brains and the spree ended. The remaining turns saw every last German infantryman and crewmember taken out of the action, but those last 3 tanks just wouldn’t die.

    It was a hootandahollerandahalf!

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