TankDawg Posted March 13, 2002 Share Posted March 13, 2002 Can someone post one of those crazy SS Hamster pictures? [ March 12, 2002, 07:50 PM: Message edited by: TankDawg ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Goanna Posted March 13, 2002 Share Posted March 13, 2002 Oh Mr. Aitken, your services are required. I'd do it, but I'm a real stickler for copyrights Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bruno Weiss Posted March 13, 2002 Share Posted March 13, 2002 Now, with CMBB coming out I think it only appropriate at this juncture that we revisit the subject of the hampster. I mean, what scientific evidence and indisputable facts do we have about the plight of the hampster in the good ole Soviet Union. Otherwise, they may be presumed to be insignificant and therefore eliminated from the written record. For example; 1. Did Russian hampsters have Stalins organs? 2. What do the Russians do exactly with hampsters? 3. Does one eat the hampster in the bottom of the vodka bottle? 4. Were there hampsters in the NKVD, or were they called rodents? And more importantly; 5. Were there female hampsters in the Russian military? These are important considerations as we proceed with a streamless integration of the next CM gaming level. [ March 12, 2002, 09:44 PM: Message edited by: Bruno Weiss ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Emrys Posted March 13, 2002 Share Posted March 13, 2002 In the spirit of public service I will essay a reply to these questions of some moment. Originally posted by Bruno Weiss: 1. Are there pedigree Russian hampsters?Please try to keep in mind that the Soviet Union (as it was then) was a classless society, a rodent's paradise. 2. What do the Russians do exactly with hampsters?This question cannot be answered without violating the rules of the Board. Sorry. 3. Is there a hampster in the bottom of the vodka bottle?Yes. Regrettably some hamsters have no self-discipline. 4. How do hampsters survive the cruel Russian winters?They dessicate and become dormant. The spring thaw rehydrates them and they become active again. 5. Do Russian hampsters have Babushkas or are they a solitary critter?Hamsters (at least when not dormant) are quite jolly and sociable fellows who do everything in groups. This is why collectivization came so naturally to them. Long live the Rodents' Paradise! Michael Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bruno Weiss Posted March 13, 2002 Share Posted March 13, 2002 Ah, you caught me in the middle of changing the format. Yes, this is good. We simply must have hard facts to support the existence of the hampster in Russia. Most importantly, we must determine what the degree of significance they had on the battlefield. We've all seen the pictures of German hampsters in action. Without a doubt they were a decisive determinant factor during Operation Barbarossa. Their ability to penetrate the Soviet rear is unquestionable. We simply must however, clearly establish what the role of the hampster was in the Russian Army. Are there any pictures of Hampsters in Action in the Red Army? [ March 12, 2002, 09:58 PM: Message edited by: Bruno Weiss ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
patolino Posted March 13, 2002 Share Posted March 13, 2002 Originally posted by Bruno Weiss: We simply must however, clearly establish what the role of the hampster was in the Russian Army. You will find all the information you need in this document. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bruno Weiss Posted March 13, 2002 Share Posted March 13, 2002 Ah Ha! Proof positive of the significance of the Soviet rodent war. Who would a thunk it. LMAO. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joseph Porta Posted March 13, 2002 Share Posted March 13, 2002 YES ! The Hamstertruppen are back ! I've waited for this thread for SOOO long... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HVAP Posted March 13, 2002 Share Posted March 13, 2002 What the...?!? Someone please explain this! Will BTS include Hamsters in CMBB? Somebody do somefink! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Emrys Posted March 13, 2002 Share Posted March 13, 2002 I recall a year or so back someone posted a link to a webpage of dancing rodents getting blown away little by little. That was absolutely hilarious. If that page still exists and somebody knows where it is, could they please post a link? Also, there was the famous Hamster cannon... Michael Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HVAP Posted March 14, 2002 Share Posted March 14, 2002 Answering all of my posts today eh Michael (see ".50s from above")I am indebted to you for this knowledge you are imparting to me today. Thanks again take care Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Emrys Posted March 14, 2002 Share Posted March 14, 2002 Originally posted by HVAP: Answering all of my posts today eh Michael (see ".50s from above")I am indebted to you for this knowledge you are imparting to me today. Thanks again take care "Service is my honor." Michael Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bruno Weiss Posted March 14, 2002 Share Posted March 14, 2002 Will BTS include Hamsters in CMBB? That ofcourse my good man, is the question. The effort here is to clearly establish that hampsters indeed played a tactically significant role in the fighting on the Ostfront. As you may know, bird chirps, trenches, tanks that never were but might have been, may all be tactically significant. But these elements pale when compared to the dedication and sacrifice of the hampsters in the war. The grogs in this forum accept nothing less than the relentless pursuit of historical facts and indisputable evidence. Often uncovering obscure references, training manuals, and third party tales and recollections which have completely altered many of the worlds more orthadox views of the war as we understood them. So, once more into the breech of knowledge and enlightenment we charge. Headlong with wild abandon we proceed with common goal and perserverance and dogged determination where together, paw and whisker we shall see it through. The plight of the hampster on the Ostfront is a story which must be told. A story of bravery and sacrifice that beckons to us all a standard by which each rodent must be measured. Then, and only then will we truly know what it means to be a hampster. {sniff} [ March 13, 2002, 06:35 PM: Message edited by: Bruno Weiss ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TankDawg Posted March 14, 2002 Author Share Posted March 14, 2002 Come on! Great posts. But where are the Pictures!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HVAP Posted March 15, 2002 Share Posted March 15, 2002 bump Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seanachai Posted March 15, 2002 Share Posted March 15, 2002 Stalin had all the Hamsters shot, as they were not sufficiently Slavic. Russia made do with Lemmings and Voles. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spook Posted March 15, 2002 Share Posted March 15, 2002 A refresher, for those who missed it early last year: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HVAP Posted March 15, 2002 Share Posted March 15, 2002 So funny yet so disturbing Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Splinty Posted March 15, 2002 Share Posted March 15, 2002 Although there were indeed many tales of heroism and gallantry by the Soviet hamsters,it's a little known fact that many of the Russian hamsters were in front line service because of their religious beliefs. Because of Communisms repression of all religion many hamsters were given a choice between the Gulag and the front lines. It just seems that the hamsters' worship of the exercise wheel was incompatible with the goals of the state. Another little known fact is that many of the desperate "human wave" attacks attempted in the desperate early days of the war were led by "rodent waves" consisting of mass attacks by mixed groups of rodents to include hamsters,gerbils,guinea pigs and even the occasional chupacabra,many of whom immigrated from South America to join their socialist brothers in the heroic "peoples" struggle. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bruno Weiss Posted March 15, 2002 Share Posted March 15, 2002 Rodents of the world unite!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joseph Porta Posted March 15, 2002 Share Posted March 15, 2002 "Also, there was the famous Hamster cannon..." LOL, My favourite !!! If only I could find it again... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ryan Crierie Posted March 16, 2002 Share Posted March 16, 2002 A brave Panzerhamstertruppen takes aim at the dirty RED T-34 with his 'zook Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Emrys Posted March 16, 2002 Share Posted March 16, 2002 Except for the fact that it looks more like a prairie dog than a hamster, and he is using a weapon that wasn't created until well after the war, well done sir! You've got the spirit of the thing. Michael Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seanachai Posted March 16, 2002 Share Posted March 16, 2002 Originally posted by Michael emrys: Except for the fact that it looks more like a prairie dog than a hamster, and he is using a weapon that wasn't created until well after the war, well done sir! You've got the spirit of the thing. MichaelBe a true CM Grog, man! That is a prairie dog, and you're being a piddler if you call it anything else, or allow anyone to pass it off as other. (as for the weapon itself, that's all Grog business, and nowhere near as important as the correct identification of CM Rodents...) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bruno Weiss Posted March 16, 2002 Share Posted March 16, 2002 The record isn't clear on exact numbers, but German born rodents who had become expatriated before the war, in many cases returned to Germany to fight for the Reich. This might explain the pictorial evidence of what appears to be a prairie dog fighting on the Ostfront. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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