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SturmSebber

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Posts posted by SturmSebber

    The Peng Challenge Thread, it’s good to be back!

    in Combat Mission Shock Force 1

    Posted

    STOCKHOLM (AFP) — A hen in southern Sweden that has grown a rooster comb, tail and wattle and begun to crow is wreaking havoc in its henhouse, where the rooster, Henry VIII, is hopping mad, Swedish media reported on Friday.

    "Henry VIII is bloody angry. The other hens are mostly just surprised but they seem to increasingly accept him or her," the owner of the henhouse, Christel Hammar-Malmgren, told the online edition of regional daily Blekinge Laens Tidning.

    Hammar-Malmgren woke up one morning in July to the sound of two roosters crowing, instead of just one. To her surprise, she discovered that one of the black hens, Anne Boleyn — all of the hens are named after Henry VIII's wives — had undergone a transformation.

    "She had lost most of her hen feathers and had begun growing a comb and tail," she said.

    The transsexual hen joined the henhouse last year and was different from the start. She was uninterested in the usual hen chores and laid bad eggs, Hammar-Malmgren said.

    She insisted however that despite the change, and unlike the hen's namesake, there were no plans to end Anne Boleyn's days prematurely.

    Swedes scare me.
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    Badgers?! We Don't Need No Stinking Badgers In the Peng Challenge Thread!

    in Combat Mission Shock Force 1

    Posted

    Anyway, it seems i'm the talk of the town.. again . It is good to be the king!

    Now let's commence Operation please sir 37mm :

    GIVE me more Love, or more Disdain;

    The Torrid, or the Frozen Zone

    Bring equall ease unto my paine;

    The Temperate affords me none:

    Either extreme, of Love, or Hate,

    Is sweeter than a calme estate.

    Give me a storme; if it be Love,

    Like Danae in that golden showre

    I swim in pleasure; if it prove

    Disdain, that Torrent will devour

    My Vulture-hopes; and he's possest

    Of Heaven, that's but from Hell releast:

    Then crown my joyes, or cure my pain;

    Give me more Love, or more Disdain.

    *bows*
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    Badgers?! We Don't Need No Stinking Badgers In the Peng Challenge Thread!

    in Combat Mission Shock Force 1

    Posted

    Originally posted by Seanachai:

    Only on European newsstands. In America, you'd have to pay a serious premium to see the handsome, blue-eyed Youthful Foreign Faggot propositioned by the Crone.

    In Europe we believe in human rights, and porn -in every conceivable and inconceivable fashion, needs to be accesible to the common man, as surely nakedness and nastyness is what being a human being is all about!
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    Badgers?! We Don't Need No Stinking Badgers In the Peng Challenge Thread!

    in Combat Mission Shock Force 1

    Posted

    Some people's lives resemble a romatic novel, an intellectual artwork, an exciting detective.... mine resembles a cheap porn magazine.

    Let me tell you guys about something that happend to me this morning. Better, let me first take you back to yesterday evening.

    My phone rings, and a lady, nay let's just call her woman, a woman who is a client of mine on my newspaperroute asks if i can bring her some extra items the folowing morning. I would just have to ring the doorbel and she promises to come to the door and repay me for these extra items.

    Fine, no problem, i'm a friendly guy (inspite of what sir37mm says) and this is a small favour to do.

    As promised, i ring her doorbell, prepare to hand her her newspaper and the extra items i got her, as suddenly appears in front of me an almost naked female body, only a véry few inches of cloth manage to keep at least some body parts partially hidden. Leaning forward into what some would call a sensual position she greets me.

    interludium:

    Now this is the kind of thing most of you perverts here would enjoy, a new anecdote to brag about to friends and one not to tell the wife... But wait, the fun is yet to come.

    As my eyes try to get back their focus i notice the loose skin that probably has been used as some perverted sandingpaper and wich resembles a lot those worn-out formula one tires.

    As my glance goes upward towards her bosom, i see a flimsy bra, filled with what probably were two quite solid "pillows of sin" but now have transformed into somekind of evil crackled soufflé.

    Quickly i lower my glare, but sadly in the wrong direction! There they were.. the underpants of doom !! Words cannot describe this piece of cloathing that covered that most truely forbidden (!) fruit at the intersection of the creatures legs... Trying to withold my peristaltic movements, i quickly look upwards (trying to avoid the flimsy bra and wrinkeled skin) towards her face... a set of -more than ought to be obvious- plastic teeth grin towards me, and -i swear by god- a small stream of saliva appears near the corner of her mouth...

    Suddenly i realise that i am standing in the middle of a public street, inches away from an almost naked 70 year old woman, eagerly eyeballing me.

    "Don't mind me" a screechy voices rambles in what seems to be a far away place: "I was just preparing for a bath".

    "Don't mind me while i burn out my eyes with a hot poker" i try to reply , but my tongue is numbed and my facial muscles are still in shock.

    After what seemed like minutes but in fact were merely seconds i mumble something like "oh, no problem", while my brain screams : "run, run, you fool !".

    And while i take a step back, and try to avoid her greedy hands, i hand her over her stuff and quickly receive my money from her.

    As i walk away, more hastely than usual, towards my moped i am sure that this is how god punishes me for all the foul and perverted acts i have commited. I am convinced that whenever i am going to have the joy of intimacy with a cute, sculpted boy, i am going to see this decaying woman, grinning towards me.

    I'm off now , to the clinic, to see if anything can be done to prevent retinal detachment.

    Frightened greetings,

    Sturmy

    [ July 27, 2006, 12:48 AM: Message edited by: SturmSebber ]

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