imported_Hiram Sedai
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Posts posted by imported_Hiram Sedai
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<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by PeterNZer:
Am i on crack or did that make absolutely no sense?!
PeterNZ
ps. Hi Mom!<hr></blockquote>
Both!!
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How I long to suckle at the teat of the nicotene goddess. I am quitting smoking and I am slowly smelling New Jersey now as my senses return. Our sky is constantly gray and we live in a perpetual smog. I don't have the energy to hate anyone today. Hate yourselves for me.
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Amateur comedy Hiram Style: A Nauty Adventure
She was dressed in nothing at all. The lights were dimmed and I heard the soft, romantic music. I sidled up to her and looked longingly in her direction. My breathing became rapid and my body shook with anticipation. She sat there tantilizing me. I was a bad boy and she knew it. I inhaled her scent and it touched my spirit. I finnally found my nirvana. With trembling fingers I opened her top. I tried not to tear anything. I looked inside and found the joy that had eluded me for years. She was well endowed with cheesy goodness. I decided to be fresh, and nevermind the consequences. I reached in for the morsel of magical goodness. The cheeto touched my lips with...
and again:
I could hear the thumping of my heart. I wanted to be decadent and daring this night. If I could only stop salivating so much, then I wouldn't be so embarrased. I made sure my hands were clean and that I wasn't wearing white. She called to me. I know that I heard her call. She was in the kitchen waiting for me. It was time for a funky good luv fest, Cheeto Style. I heard a muffled, yet sultry voice call my name. I quickly put down the kitty and the Nude Teen Dwarves magazine. I ran as quickly as I could to the kitchen. I heard my name again, still muffled but a bit louder. I opened the door to her home. I don't need to knock because we already know each other and I'm always welcome.
She sat there on the second shelf below the milk. She tantalized me with her orange bag. She was wearing her Chester Cheetah t-shirt again. I carefully cradled her bag and swept her away.
In a booming baritone voice, I sang.
Oh, Sweet Mystery of Cheetos, at last I found you!!
I scampered back to the living room and stopped kitty from mounting the lamp. I sat in my favorite easy chair and sat my love interest in my lap. We were eye to cheese and words were unncessary. With trembling fingers I opened the portal to passion. The first tentative touch was to her top.
Its all amateurish and original. Opinions?
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<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Michael Dorosh:
Bumped because I forgot how to find my IP address. This is a great thread!<hr></blockquote>
..the mongoloid gentleman said as he sat and ate his...
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<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by mensch:
UPDATE!
We have for you a new mod from Hugo a Panther A from 12 SS PanzerDivision
,A new Hosted Byte Battle™ from Moriarty Last chance at Caen
also a new mod from David Singer the U.S. Halftrack
A map from Bill Carey Lines of Transit.
Berli has cleaned up his A long and Bloody Mile apparently he smoothed out some water areas.
And Finally, I just got an email from Hugo Mr. Panther himself ; he wrote me he'll have for me a Panther A from 5th SS PanzerDivision «VIKING» You'll see that up at der Kessel tomorrow! So stay tuned!
enjoy
Menschy<hr></blockquote>
Oh, so that's the reason for this sudden pulsating turgidity.
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Berli
I have received once more the gift of Monday and am sore displeased. Tis a most maleovent gift and I suffer. Oh, how I suffer. The underlings, they call out with fake maladies, but the mail piles up. You have plagued me with this day and I abhor you still. When my manager calls and berates me, I understand that it is really your voice that emanates from my phone. I sit, tempted to bludgeon and eviscerate, but can only do that to my pastry. Damn, you Berli.
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Memorandum to the Cesspool
RE: Nay Sayers to the wonder that is the Philadelphia Eagles
It has come to my attention that some of you have cast aspersions on the team that I hold so close to my hirsute bosom. There is the filthy maggot known as Marlow who is the Redskins fan and our resident Ill ih noise people known as Moriary and Berli. To these two gentlemen I say Ha [snicker] Ha [/snicker]
Even Goanna, who is normally beneath my notice, has said mean things about the Eagles with a lofty tone as if he understands the impact of an Eagles win and the destiny that is due them. I do wonder what expression will be on his unusually ugly visage when he discovers that the Eagles have just won, again. They pummeled the Chicago Bears this evening in a most satisfying victory.
I am not one to predict wins and losses. I just cheer when my beloved Eagles win and sit morosely when they lose. I am not of the caliber of fan that our flatulent Pengfriend Elvis is. I am not a season ticket holder, so I know that I won’t go to Eagle heaven. But, know that deep within the recesses of my frame, there beats the heart of a true Eagles fan and I feel the sweet rapture that comes when I see all of the Nay Sayers eat their craven words.
When you question me as to why I would ever post about a football team in the Thread of Threads, then you still don’t understand the mystery that is Hiram Sedai. Continue to state that the Eagles won’t go all the way and I will continue to abhor you.
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I yearn to stop working and go home to play combat mission and drink beer. Instead it will be a beer mission and combat with the girlfriend. Oh poor twisted me.
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<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Gyrene:
Robinson, coo-coo coo-choo. Between periods of the Lakers game they discussed why they should not let the FAQ thread drop out of the map, because when it does someone will invariably ask about how they can take screen shots of CM.
But soon they were distracted by the half time show, which involved a bevy of Finnish girls in snow camouflage bikinis demonstrating how they could disable Russian tanks with...
Gyrene<hr></blockquote>
a wink, a nudge, and a say no more. So, your wife...she likes sport? She's a real...
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Last night was quite fulfilling. Graphic descriptions of the inner workings of a female’s abdomen had me sitting down and feeling woozy. My beloved sister saw me squirm as she described her C-Section procedure combined with her tubbaligation. I remain grateful that I am not a female. They are certainly the tougher gender. I mentioned her honorary title and she politely laughed. She was on perkaset and thusly I was spared her diatribe on why her older brother plays games with old men. I was not allowed to see my niece because she is still sequestered in the NICU and quite guarded by the nurses. I am entirely too male to be allowed to see her yet. My hairy man hands would do no good for her. She has lost 3 oz thus far but is crying quite loudly (which I am so freakin happy about). Annabella already knows how to complain bitterly about her place in this life. She is so much my niece!! The mother will go home Saturday and the daughter a week after (if all goes well). I'll be back in Hiram mode after this post. Run away, Bauhaus!!
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<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by bauhaus:
The wheel's on the bus go 'round and 'round, 'round and 'round, the wheels on the bus.....that's all I've learned to far.
I sir demand a game. I've been shamed and humiliated because you are such a nasty nasty man. Have you been receiving one on one lessons from Berli?<hr></blockquote>
Taunt me first, ya fairy!! Original taunting. I don't even care if it's nonsensical jibberish like what you've already shared. Berli taught me nothing about taunting. Just smoke. hehe
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<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Croda:
That's pretty bold talk for a one-eyed fat-man. You're a big tough guy when you aren't sending turns. Send one on over so I can go back to teaching you a little humility.<hr></blockquote>
Dude, here are my choices:
1. Stay home and send a turn to Croda
2. Visit two family members. One of them is smarter and better looking than both of us and the other is smarter and better looking than you even though she was born the day before yesterday. She needs to gain some weight, so I wonder if they will let me pre chew some fries for her.
I chose number two unless you can gurgle and produce green poop.
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<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by bauhaus:
Hiram-
You are good! I liked mine better though.<hr></blockquote>
hehe
I knew that if it sounded intelligent, then it couldn't be yours. All my stuff is original and...you're still a brainless twit. What is so funny is that Croda thinks it's really yours. I guess he traveled with you on the little bus to school.
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Here is the original, Bauhaus. You are simply a punk.
'Ugliest girl' sues school district over taunting
Los Angeles Times
Jan. 09, 2002 09:40:00
AGOURA HILLS, Calif. - A 17-year-old student who was named on the Internet as the "ugliest girl" at her school has sued her former school district, claiming officials did nothing to stop "the escalating pattern of sexual harassment" by other students.
Sophomore Alison Goller quit Agoura High School after "the taunting became unbearable," according to the lawsuit.
Alison was teased at first about her appearance, then accused of promiscuity, the suit alleged.
After a bout of mononucleosis, Alison returned to school last February to more taunting from classmates and a teacher, prompting her to leave the school.
"People really do mean things in high school," Alison said in an interview. "I'm really surprised nobody has brought a gun to school at Agoura," which is about 30 miles west of downtown Los Angeles.
Donald Zimring, deputy superintendent of the Las Virgenes Unified School District, said the school district never comments on student matters. But he said the district has protocols that include notifying police, and its administrators are trained to handle such situations.
"We are confident the school district did everything it was required to do," he said.
Alison said she can relate to how tormented students in high schools from Columbine to Santee must have felt. But she said she never thought of harming anyone as a solution.
"It was not cool to be different at Agoura," she said.
At her new high school in the Los Angeles Unified School District, which she declined to name, Alison said students are taught to respect each other and the kind of teasing she endured at Agoura High is not tolerated.
Her mother, Catherine M. Adams, a lawyer, said she was dissatisfied with the response of Las Virgenes district officials to her request for their help in ending the harassment. She rejected their suggestion that Alison leave school and complete an independent study program.
"My feeling was, why does she have to stay home by herself with no education and no socialization while the kids who did this to her were at school?" Adams said.
Adams sued the school district and Assistant Principal Brad Benioff, who led an internal investigation into the complaints, on Dec. 14 in federal court in Los Angeles. Adams said she was never told the results of the inquiry.
The lawsuit claims her daughter's civil rights were violated when she was "constructively expelled" from district schools by the sexual and gender-based harassment. The suit seeks unspecified compensatory and punitive damages.
Alison alleged her troubles began in the summer of 2000 when she was "humiliated and embarrassed" because her name appeared on a Web site under the category of "ugliest girl" in her school's entering 10th-grade class, according to the lawsuit.
A few weeks later, a rumor circulated around school that there was a videotape of Alison having sex with several boys at a party, and classmates began calling her "slut" and "whore," the suit alleged.
Last February, Alison got mononucleosis and was absent for two weeks. When she returned to school, one teacher, in front of a class, put his shirt over his nose and mouth and said to Alison, "Get away from me, I don't want to get mono," according to the lawsuit.
Students also taunted her about the illness. One said, "I don't know how you got mono. You're so ugly, no guy would ever kiss you," the suit said.
About the same time, her name appeared again on a Web site identifying her as "the ugliest girl at Agoura High School," the suit alleged. The Web site, once used by San Fernando Valley students to anonymously hurl insults at one another, was shut down in March by its site provider.
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<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by jshandorf:
Dag nabbit! Madmatt locked my Blackhawk Down thread! That dirty bird!
Well, if it wasn't for Wack-Off Captain and M. Deush tossing out "Hi, Mom"s to gain the desperate attention they so desire from the Bald One a few more people might have learned of the bravery and honor of our US soldiers. But these two numb-nuts don't have any fricken clue on the proper edicate and use of the "Hi, Mom" phrase. Instead they go running willy-nilly tossing it around like some bald-ass hareni-chrishna passing out flowers at the airport. Fricken hareni-chrishnas. I hate them too.
Jeff<hr></blockquote>
Shandy Duncan Take some ritalin and go to the General forum. Your thread is there. Yeesh!!
They owe me a commission on the "Hi Mom" phrase.
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<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by bauhaus:
Forgive me for some of my puctuation and the misuse of it's,its....trying to work and post is not an easy thing as is chewing gum and walking. I shan't hush.
What did I do to get such an outburst from you? Hit a nerve? I'd act like I care, but I really don't. Now crawl back into your hole and continue you masturbatory fantasies about me and my thingy.
Am I a twit? I guess I am if you say so. Now I must go cry because I'm so hurt and offended by the mean and nasty things you said to me.<hr></blockquote>
Wow!! You really are a dim bulb!! You complain that there isn't enough taunting so I taunt you and then you say "hey, why are you taunting me?"
It's not all about masterbation and holes. There is much more to life than your obsession. Go out and live a little. Find your niche.
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<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by bauhaus:
Blah blah, blah, blah, feckin' blah.................That's what this thread is a bunch of. First of all, we're cursed with a duplicate thread name. It sucked the first time around and really sucks now. What a bunch of feckin' tripe. I've had it with the lot of you. Bunch of children.
This is the MBT and taunting is where it's at. If you can't handle the abuse, get the feck out. My God boys......"They're making fun of my flying machine game, I can't take it." Well, I've had the game longer than the lot of you and am not going about talking about it's greatness, nor am I whining about it when someone pokes fun of the mention of it. It's an enjoyable game, so what. Get a feckin' life, this is a board not Real Life. If you believe that, get one.....a life that is.
This is intended at no one in particular so if you take offense to it, oh well. I think the name of the next thread shall be:
The Peng Challenge Thread has lost its Mojo or somefink like that.
Now, go kill things, fly into the ground on take off or just sit there and pout.....I don't really care. Piss Off, the lot of you.<hr></blockquote>
Bauhaus, you feeble minded twit. Congrats on typing the longest post ever from a twit. Did you have a 5th grader help you out with the punctuation and grammar? I’ll wait while you look up those words. Let me take this time to comment on how the average cesspooler has commented that its not safe to bare one’s hindquarters because Bauhaus has evil intent. “Sit down, Bauhaus” is the most common phrase. There has to be a reason why people fear the intrusion into the nether regions when you are around. Let me expound upon this fear a bit. When did you first display your other than hetero tendencies? I wasn’t around when you first thrust your “thingy” into the Cesspool at large, but by the time I got here, I noticed the surreptitious glances your way when anyone mentioned something sexual. It was a fear that you and your codpiece would plunder and pillage the population at large with much sweating and grunting from the effort. Even I showed a bit of trepidation at turning my back because of the infamous Bauhaus maneuver. I can only guess that you’ve only successfully used and abused one of our population thus far. The fellows at the mens only club call him “Sean” for short. (or short Sean) We know that Seanachai has fallen victim to your rabid thrusting because we hear a squeal and then there is the Bard face down with doilies all over the floor. His usual cacophony of poetic mewlings nauseates us and forces us to look the other way while we consign ourselves that this is just the way of things. So, go ahead and pretend that you have very clean junk (immaculate thingy) and hush up now or I shall taunt you a second time.
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<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by jd:
Hiram I would consider it an honor as my first official game back in the pool to eviscerate, ruminate, pontificiate and bitch slap you up the side o' your cranky assed head in a manly and civil game. Any preferences on your method of dispatch?
Ahh, hell's bell's Joseph what the Sam Hill has been going on here since my sabbatical. Get your candy ass back in here, pick up your mantle and quit your whining. You are the Once and Future Justicar always were, always will be. Take advice from a 'simple country lawyer', you will always be hated, despisd and outcast, but such are the burdens of those who would be great. Just keep the list.....you know ....the list! Besides, as 'Official Lawyer of the Mutha Beautiful Thread' I need you. What would Perry Mason have done without Hamilton Burger et al.?
[ 01-16-2002: Message edited by: jd ]<hr></blockquote>
Okay,My forces will be 5000 Points of Unrestricted British lads and armor thingies
Your forces will be 300 points of German stuff that you can only spend points on fortifications and support. But you can't buy anything with a gun or wheels.
I'll send the setup later.
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Jdmorse is here. Does this mean that D.C. Lawyer will go away? We have a real lawyer in the house. Welcome back, jd! Know that I still abhor your visage the way a heroin addict hates the poh leese. You are a festering chancre sore dipped in dog vomitus dropped in a bag of horse offal on the back of a truck of decomposing bodies from a leper colony. That is the same truck that drove through Los Angeles and was expectorated upon by each and every backward citizen of your rancid state. Am I bitter from all of those losses? You bet your pale, flabby, geriatric, overpaid, pampered ass!! Have I learned anything more about CM since you cravenly cheated like a two bit whore at a Skip Bo game for a vial of crack cocaine and 5 bucks to go down to the local 7-11 for a pack of smokes? I’m not saying. If you are feeling up to it, then you may send a setup my way. I’m currently engaged in a spankathon with Croda (may his tongue fall out from singing too many Rasta man songs) and Elvis (may Beano be his companion to show some mercy in this cold cruel world)
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Non Gamey Update:
3.75 lb Annabella Ramesar entered into this world today thanks to induced labor. The baby and the mother are doing fine. The mother is a bit grumpy due to a C-Section.
Thanks for the support, folks.
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My little sister is back in the hospital. The fetus has an irregular heartbeat, the lungs are developing incorrectly, and there is a lack of amniotic fluid. They are keeping my sister for two weeks and will induce labor if need be. I know so little about pregnancy that it's a bit frustrating. I've gotten pretty good at cheering Beth up though. I used to be scared of hospitals but now I wander around like I belong there. I mention some of you every once in a while and she graciously listens and laughs at the appropriate times. I'm struggling to be positive for her sake even though I don't feel it when I'm at home. I guess I'm mostly afraid that having labor will create too much pressure on her brain and send her into a coma.
If you pray to a deity, then I would appreciate any prayers for her.
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<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Iron Chef Sakai:
If you give him his screen name back, whats from stopping him from literly "losing" it again?
I vote he keeps his current screen name........"gay slut" or whatever it is.<hr></blockquote>
You don't get a vote. Quit bumping your gums and simmer down now.
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If I had a vote and it actually mattered, then I would say that MRHAPPY would be my choice. Only he has elicited any emotional response from me thus far. I met the gentleman who bears the name of MRPeng and saw how fragmented his personality truly is. It was manic and somewhat disturbing. It was probably his Fonzie like visage coupled with his baritone warblings that pushed me over the edge into nailbiting trepidation and abject weeping. His salsa was oh so yummy but burned my intestines with ferocity. When confronted with MRPeng face to face, you become grateful for people like Elvis even though flatulance is his forte.
Edited because I need not be within the confines of the Peng thread to be fallible. We all know the name of the individual who is infallible and I need not mention his name once more.
[ 01-13-2002: Message edited by: Hiram Sedai ]</p>
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<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by rune:
I have a nice scenario set in 1941, with things that explode and conscript human wave attacks. There are aircraft, a factory, East Poland, and strange looking things [NOT those things Bauhaus ] that look like a Bob Semples tank. There are also things that explode, and more things that explode.
Try Cut Off! If you haven't played it yet. Canadians vs the Gerries. [Gerry Springer, Gerry Lewis [the French spelling], Gerry atric].
Now go away before I have to taunt you a second time....
Rune
Making Scenario for the Peng thread since before the dark days of cess...
[ 01-11-2002: Message edited by: rune ]<hr></blockquote>Could you please send it to hiramsedai@earthlink.net
thanks!!
[ 01-11-2002: Message edited by: Hiram Sedai ]</p>
One Flew Over the PENG CHALLENGE Thread
in Combat Mission Archive #4 (2002)
Posted
<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by bauhaus:
Ouch.......that was just plain mean. Mean, mean, mean, mean.....did I say it yet? Mean.<hr></blockquote>
Oh, please stop whining already.