Mark IV Posted July 29, 2000 Share Posted July 29, 2000 I may have made some remarks about the artillery in the past which could be construed as slighting. I should like to clarify now. Arty has just Delivered Me From Evil (evil as personified by the increasingly hated Seanachai) in an otherwise lopsided gun battle between the youthful innocents of SS Hitlerjugend, and a horde of Churchill's thugs, leavened no doubt by a soft core of Canadians. They were infesting a tree line, we had a few buildings, and we were lookin' a tad weak. Really screwed, in fact. Finally the most beautiful display of CENSOREDmm pyrotechnics have begun to bloom within the British ranks. Treebursts, massive craters, and cries of "the bahstids!" are SO sweet. I have never been quite so fond of artillery as I am at this moment. Once in a great while, I am reminded that the artillery deserves their RVs and lawn chairs, and can truly be a magic wand of fireballs (love that phrase). I can just hear my little polygons cheering. Please keep it coming. Sincerely, Mark IV Representing Idiots since 1999 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seanachai Posted July 30, 2000 Share Posted July 30, 2000 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Mark IV: I may have made some remarks about the artillery in the past which could be construed as slighting. I should like to clarify now. Arty has just Delivered Me From Evil (evil as personified by the increasingly hated Seanachai) in an otherwise lopsided gun battle between the youthful innocents of SS Hitlerjugend, and a horde of Churchill's thugs, leavened no doubt by a soft core of Canadians. They were infesting a tree line, we had a few buildings, and we were lookin' a tad weak. Really screwed, in fact. Finally the most beautiful display of CENSOREDmm pyrotechnics have begun to bloom within the British ranks. Treebursts, massive craters, and cries of "the bahstids!" are SO sweet. I have never been quite so fond of artillery as I am at this moment. Once in a great while, I am reminded that the artillery deserves their RVs and lawn chairs, and can truly be a magic wand of fireballs (love that phrase). I can just hear my little polygons cheering. Please keep it coming. Sincerely, Mark IV Representing Idiots since 1999<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> To heck with what my troops did, when that stuff started coming in I thought you were catapulting knocked out German vehicles and nearly wet myself. I was on level one view with the volume up where the stuff started to land, and from my position under the desk, I was shouting 'the bahstids' right along with my guys. ------------------ After witnessing exceptional bravery from his Celtic mercenaries, Alexander the Great called them to him and asked if there was anything they feared. They told him nothing, except that the sky might fall on their heads. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
von Lucke Posted July 30, 2000 Share Posted July 30, 2000 Hmmm, I believe this is from that 7 June 44 scenario entitled "*-sensored-*". I experienced a similar epiphany when playing it PBEM against *-sensored-*, and his *-sensored-* troopers began to infest the tree-line just North of *-sensored-* just as the barrage I'd pre-requested some *-sensored-* minutes before arrived on target. It's nice to play the Germans and be on the delivering end of a *-sensored-*mm hello for once, isn't it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark IV Posted July 30, 2000 Author Share Posted July 30, 2000 Indeed. There just never seems to be enough CENSOREDmm ammo to go 'round. Ah, well. Back to turreted things I understand. Come to think of it, there's never enough of them to go around, either. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fionn Posted July 30, 2000 Share Posted July 30, 2000 Guys, You haven't beheld true beauty until EIGHT ( yes EIGHT) 81mm and 105mm FOs get to drop virtually all their ammo onto the top of an American infantry battalion advancing in column formation over the course of ten minutes. I haven't used all my arty and figure it got about 200 of the blighters already. Last thing I saw was a few broken platoons running for the rear ( unfortunately for them my last two 105mm FOs were just about to drop arty right onto the locations the US were running to hide in). As Cartmann would say "SWEET !" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Freyland Posted July 30, 2000 Share Posted July 30, 2000 Hey von Lucke, stop CENSORING me! I still have one or two mortar crewmembers left to take on your child-devouring horde. We need more posts like this, and less argumentative stuff. These are much more fun (once the shrapnel wounds heal) Jonathan Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bullethead Posted July 30, 2000 Share Posted July 30, 2000 Mark IV said: <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Finally the most beautiful display of CENSOREDmm pyrotechnics have begun to bloom within the British ranks. Treebursts, massive craters, and cries of "the bahstids!" are SO sweet. I have never been quite so fond of artillery as I am at this moment. Once in a great while, I am reminded that the artillery deserves their RVs and lawn chairs, and can truly be a magic wand of fireballs (love that phrase).<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> This is called an "epiphany". In this type of situation, the usual manifestation seems to be a vision of St. Barbara seen hovering above the shellbursts. She is usually described as in the throes of a massive wargasm, caused by straddling a red-hot 155mm gun tube, and uttering the following between pants and gasps of ecstacy: "Grovel, pitiful cannonfodder. Suck the tit of Mother Earth and pray I find you too insignificant to utterly destroy." So, did you see this vision? If so, then you are truly blessed ------------------ -Bullethead It was a common custom at that time, in the more romantic females, to see their soldier husbands and sweethearts as Greek heroes, instead of the whoremongering, drunken clowns most of them were. However, the Greek heroes were probably no better, so it was not so far off the mark--Flashman Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark IV Posted July 31, 2000 Author Share Posted July 31, 2000 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Bullethead: So, did you see this vision? If so, then you are truly blessed<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Oh... I thought that was Elizabeth Hurley (saints all look the same in mid-wargasm). Quite a vision, at any rate. Those cannon-cockers are livin' right! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bullethead Posted July 31, 2000 Share Posted July 31, 2000 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>I thought that was Elizabeth Hurley (saints all look the same in mid-wargasm)<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> No, it has to be St. Barbara. She's the saint of artillerymen, whores, and other things that go BANG in the night ------------------ -Bullethead It was a common custom at that time, in the more romantic females, to see their soldier husbands and sweethearts as Greek heroes, instead of the whoremongering, drunken clowns most of them were. However, the Greek heroes were probably no better, so it was not so far off the mark--Flashman Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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