Sailor Malan Posted March 12, 2003 Share Posted March 12, 2003 Originally posted by Andreas: Well, nothing to update at the moment, because I am in Rome until tomorrow. Suffice to say that Mr Blue truly must be a Monty acolyte of the slowest sort. I will see if I can light a fire under him to get him going. At the moment, the smart money is on me. The smart money may be, but the real money is on me. I am ready for you any time... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andreas Posted March 12, 2003 Share Posted March 12, 2003 Dear Mr. Blue, I guess that means we are both ready for each other. Since my turn is at this point in time with you, may I kindly ask for you to return it fortwith, for me to peruse the result of your deliberations on how to achieve my demise at my leisure. Hugs. Mr Brown 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andreas Posted March 12, 2003 Share Posted March 12, 2003 Cor blimey guv! While your boys and girls, and my tax money is out-a-hunting to give Saddam a good wag of the tail with Tally-ho and toodle pips, and all that, I thought it would be nice to have a drink without feeling guilty about collateral damage. This Saturday 1700 in The Chandos pub near Charing Cross Stn. The Chandos location info Stiff upper lips and whalerus moustaches preferred, but not required. Even Americans can come, although I am sure that should the domestic situation prevent them from showing up, we can handle our beer ourselves. Contingency orders will be made at the bar. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ex Bellator Posted March 12, 2003 Author Share Posted March 12, 2003 Andreas - I can't make this weekend, RL continues to ruin potential quality time. However I have started growing a moustache to be ready for the next meet, which as it appears I'm about to be made redundant (2nd time in 5 years :mad: ), I will have all the time in the world to attend. Whizzo! See I've even started learning the handlebar moustache banter... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Iain Fuller Posted March 13, 2003 Share Posted March 13, 2003 Just to let everyone know that myself and Cpt Piesofski are on turn 10. The cheating Red swine has control of both flags and therefore is just where I want him. Pretty soon I will unleash my amazing new secret weapon upon him and accept his surrender - I have a 300mm YodelRekordSpielerWagen turned up to 11 - victory I feel is imminent. Sorry to hear about your job Rex. [ March 13, 2003, 04:17 AM: Message edited by: Iain Fuller ] 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Pies Posted March 13, 2003 Share Posted March 13, 2003 Holy Mother of Kazan They have a YodelRekordSpeilerWagen! Quickly comrades lower the flaps on your Ushankas. Ha, those unkulturny Facisti think they are just for keeping our ears warm. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andreas Posted March 13, 2003 Share Posted March 13, 2003 I am very happy to see the cause of Communism prevail in this tournament. The historical inevitability of the victory of our Marxist system should become clear to the sausage-eating invaders by now. Lets hope for an 8-0, or somefink. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andreas Posted March 13, 2003 Share Posted March 13, 2003 Comrades, in our never ending quest for scientific supremacy on the battlefield, I wish to present to you an analysis conducted by our esteemed Comrade Stalin, outlining The three stages of the German infantry attack (meaning - the ones after they drink the beer, eat the sausage, and yodel themselves into oblivion) 1. The confident dash The picture below shows a strapping German lad, dashing towards what he believes will be his at the end of the day. This is clear parade-ground tactics. 2. Hitting the deck Unfortunately for him and his comrades, their commander Mr.Blue never managed his bed-time reading. He must have missed out on the story of the hare and the tortoise (or Hase and Igel in Hintertupfing, where they come from). Together with a jolly 'Ik bün all dor' from a Soviet tank crew, a hail of cannister rounds greeted this doomed trooper when he crested the skyline. 3. Belly-wiggling Here we see the effect of such a hail of fire straight from the steel-furnaces of Magnitogorsk. The Germans lose all the drive and stored-up anger, and all they think of is getting back to where the sausages came from. Comrades, this concludes Lesson 1. Your essays titled 'What I learned from the wisdom imparted on me by Comrade Stalin who I dearly love' are expected in the Kommissar's office by close of play today. Dismissed, go and agitate the troops now. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andreas Posted March 13, 2003 Share Posted March 13, 2003 4. The Larch T.H.E...L.A.R.C.H... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Iain Fuller Posted March 14, 2003 Share Posted March 14, 2003 As the evil Piesofski keeps thwarting every attempt at foul play and general skullduggary on my part, I reckon that I'll have to resort to hiding from the filthy Commie swine to restore some pride in the mighty and just Teutonic cause. Oh by the way - Larch ????? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Prester John Posted March 15, 2003 Share Posted March 15, 2003 edited for mysterious reasons [ March 14, 2003, 05:05 PM: Message edited by: Prester John ] 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andreas Posted March 15, 2003 Share Posted March 15, 2003 Originally posted by Iain Fuller: Oh by the way - Larch ????? Did not know that playing the Germans would rub off so badly. Ver ist der zvei Peanuts, eh Iain? Soon to come - another lesson for the losing, err, German side of this tournament - Lord knows Mr.Blue could use it 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ex Bellator Posted March 16, 2003 Author Share Posted March 16, 2003 Thanks for the Python, I think it should be compulsory in our thread from now on, and remember, llamas are bigger than frogs. Been a while since I posted about my and PK's game. Well, I'm still firmly on the objectives, and have smacked down a huge assault from two sides by Red Infantry. Indeed all that remains of the Red swines is a few Maxims firing at long range AFAIK. Oh, also remaining are six indestructable uber death wagons. I've never seen anything like it. IIRC I have fired 30 odd AP rounds at them from various guns and think I may have a gun damage on a light tank and a shocked T-34 crew to show for it. Aside from my Panzers, I have had two AT guns commanded by good bonus commanders firing at the sides of his T-34s and KVs at ranges between 400-1000m. 60% good kill chances are being repeatedly missed. I have hit a few times, and have penetrated a KV frontally, track damaged another, a T34 has been side penetrated and both light tanks have been holed, but I just can't stop them. So it looks like it's going to be PK's tanks v's my infantry at the close. We are now on turn 22, and have got through a good number of turns this weekend which worries me, as PK obviously thinks he's on a winning streak... Damn good game whoever wins though. [ March 16, 2003, 12:02 PM: Message edited by: Rex Bellator ] 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andreas Posted March 16, 2003 Share Posted March 16, 2003 What everybody wanted to know: Which bush is Mr.Blue behind? His belly-wiggling Lederhosenwearers are now subject to a bit of TLC from my artillery. I predict he won't be happy, and he told me as much. Other than that, I am digging in on the objective. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Pies Posted March 17, 2003 Share Posted March 17, 2003 This is by way of a test. I stuck these on some free webspace. Don't know if there is a download limit or not. Let me know if they crap out. The much vaunted YodelRekordSpielerWagens of Obergefreiter Fullers Geheimes Yodel Rekord Lauten Speiler Sektion (GYRLSS) litter the battlefield. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soddball Posted March 17, 2003 Share Posted March 17, 2003 Mr Green and I spent a couple of turns trading AP rounds to no avail - at 300m my lone T-34 had 94,291 ricochets off Mr Green's Panzer IIIs. He got a partial turret penetration which distressed the tank commander no end - so much so that we had to scrape the worst bits off the gunsight so we could continue firing. However, he has now lost a Panzer III and a 20mm halftrack, and his remaining tanks are outflanked and inconvenienced, although they still outnumber me by lots to few. Mr Green has taken all the flags so far with his infantry, and is about to find out what BIG artillery means to men hiding in woods. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soddball Posted March 19, 2003 Share Posted March 19, 2003 Back to the top with you! Mr Green has been hiding in a cardboard box outside Bermondsey station and has been unable to return turns. The hoor. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Edward Windsor Posted March 19, 2003 Share Posted March 19, 2003 I've been busy doing busy things, Mr Pink. Check you mail for the next exciting installment of "Banging Shells Off Turrets". It's slowly starting to dawn on me why you should always buy Stugs, and lots of 'em, when you're playing a lowdown, dirty, KV-lovin' faggot. Mr Green 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soddball Posted March 19, 2003 Share Posted March 19, 2003 Originally posted by Edward Windsor: I've been busy doing busy things, Mr Pink. Check you mail for the next exciting installment of "Banging Shells Off Turrets". It's slowly starting to dawn on me why you should always buy Stugs, and lots of 'em, when you're playing a lowdown, dirty, KV-lovin' faggot. Mr Green ROTFLMAO!! I never knew you cared. Hey, it's the T-34s you're losing the fight against. Don't blame the KVs. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Edward Windsor Posted March 19, 2003 Share Posted March 19, 2003 Hey, cut me some slack! I'm trying to make myself look good by getting a few early excuses in 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ex Bellator Posted March 20, 2003 Author Share Posted March 20, 2003 This is rapidly turning to a game of utter frustration. I should have it won already, and on this turn alone I put FIVE shots from AT guns through the side turret and side of some of the unkillable soviet death tanks. These are big AT guns, and I can't even knock out a light tank, one of which has been hit about six times now and still drives around unconcernedly. Die dammit! :mad: 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Edward Windsor Posted March 20, 2003 Share Posted March 20, 2003 Hurrah! Scratch one T34. It wasn't easy, but I finally persuaded my PzIII muppets this was the rainy day they were hoarding their special magic lucky tungsten shells for. Take that, Mr Pink! I think I've turned the corner - the tide is turning and my brave boys will soon have those pesky Russkies on the run. Toodle pip, Teddy 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Iain Fuller Posted March 20, 2003 Share Posted March 20, 2003 Just to update how things are going between myself and Cpt Piekofski. I believe that the Bolshy one has fallen for my cunning plan and am glad to report that soon I will have him exactly where I want him. ************************* PS message for Prester John I can't seem to send the next move in our game Steve, email keeps getting bounced back!! Any ideas what's wrong? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Edward Windsor Posted March 20, 2003 Share Posted March 20, 2003 Originally posted by Edward Windsor: Take that, Mr Pink! I think I've turned the corner - the tide is turning and my brave boys will soon have those pesky Russkies on the run.I have indeed turned the corner ... and been hit by a truck. I'm currently being swept out to sea by the tide and I forgot to pack my water wings. Mr Green 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andreas Posted March 24, 2003 Share Posted March 24, 2003 My God - page three, and no boobs wiggling. Up up with you In other news - Mr.Blue has started shooting at my troops. He has really upset one of my [CENSORED], and the Kommissar has decided to conduct a Meeting to extol the virtue of not being upset to the unit, and celebrate the liberation of another vast swathe of Rodina soil. Therefore, this is a unique opportunity for Mr. Blue. None of my men are watching his, they have all turned their backs, and are away from their weapons. In accordance with Order No. 342 'On the Preservation of Fuel', all tank engines have been turned off. My gun crews are taking exercise and parade ground drill. Will Mr.Blue display steely-eyed and protruding jaw like determination and fall on my hapless men? Watch this space! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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