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The Peng challenge, a thread that will live in infamy


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Croda?

I thought he was dead...

I thought he was just a legend, like the leprachaun that lives at the end of Crodaburg...

What got Hiram Sedai in such a fluster?

Shandorf I am gonna penetrate that sweaty little ring of yours with such a deep thrust of my spearpoint, that you will reel in shock and crawl, CRAWL for the edges of the map.

Okay, that just sounded too nasty, I think I will go vomit profusely now.

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Panzer Leader:

I am gonna penetrate that sweaty little ring of yours with such a deep thrust of my spearpoint.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Classy. REAL classy. Maybe comments like this are why nobody likes you.

[ 07-11-2001: Message edited by: Dweezil44 ]

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My GAWD what a disaster. Not only did those down under bozos blow the transition BIG TIME, but then Stuka posts the most disgraceful, unworkable and (far worse) humorless set of rules YET! I hereby propose that NO ONE who resides below the equator be allowed to host a Peng Thread EVER AGAIN. I suspect that all the clockwise (or is it counter clockwise) rotation of the water in the toitoi has scrambled what few brains they had to begin.

Joe

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Dweezil44:

Classy. REAL classy. Maybe comments like this are why nobody likes you.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Classy? Surely you jest. There isn't enough class in this thread (and the umpteen iterations that made this one possible) to fill a crock of class 1/3 of the way to the top. There never has been, and Berli-willing, there never will be.

You're probably asking yourself: "Who the hell is this Croda guy, and what business does he have telling me what's what?" Well, rest assured that I am asking myself: "What in the name of all that smells like sausage is a Dweezil, and who's the nimrod that decided we need 44 of them?"

Yes, indeed, I am the infamous and nefarious Croda. I dropped in to pay a visit and what do I find but some ninny-ninny-nincompoop speaking of class in my CessPool. Egads! And I thought NipponBoy was the only person to put on airs in the 'Pool. My old buddy Mensch was kind enough to drop me a line to say hullo, so I figured I'd pop in here and make sure Stuka wasn't contaminating good Cess with soap or some other ungodly cleansing device (eg. CLASS!).

Somebody get poor Dweezil a copy of Cabbages and Kings so that he can brush up on his Peng.

As for the rest of you, hullo.

As for Speedy: You are a super-poo-poo-head.

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Croda:

[blahblahblah]<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

If you have enough time to come back and blather, you have enough time to finish losing our game. Send me a feckin' turn.

Ya ol' brainless prat.

Agua Perdido

PS: Happy trails to Hiram/Phan/Mikey-who-likes-it-(down-Bauhaus!). In the pool of Cess that is the Cesspool, I hated you most of all. See ya next week.

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Croda:

I suck.

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Croda, damn you! What happened to that BIG BATTLE II we started? Do you realize how long it takes to set up 7000+ points in units, and then give them all orders to attack?! Hmmm? And then, you have the nerve to lose interest in our game? Hmmm?! What?! Did the 'rickets splodin and stuff piss you off?

Damn you, Cruda, send me that turn and oh yeah... hello back. feh.

Jeff

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by jshandorf:

What?! Did the 'rickets splodin and stuff piss you off?

Jeff<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

tcha, those splodin Rickets can make one loose interest and piss ya off.. RIGHT jeff.. *snicker*... *tee hee*... ooh.

Go get'm Snoota!!

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Croda:

Classy? Surely you jest.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I never jest. And, don't call me Shirley.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR> There isn't enough class in this thread (and the umpteen iterations that made this one possible) to fill a crock of class 1/3 of the way to the top.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Perhaps not, but the saying, "More class, less crass" does try to force the taunts and bile to a slightly higher level. Now, while I realize an evolutionary throwback such as yourself might have difficulty recognizing this, I have noticed over the past six months that the bile and taunting has climbed to a slightly more urbane and refined level of viciousness such that making blatant remarks inferring forcible anal sodomy would be considered, well, uncouthe, unrefined, and beneath even the standards of the pool. Perhaps your failure to recognize that fact simply places you on the same level of achievement that Mouse has brought to the table.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>You're probably asking yourself: "Who the hell is this Croda guy, and what business does he have telling me what's what?"<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

No, not really, you aren't that important.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Well, rest assured that I am asking myself: "What in the name of all that smells like sausage is a Dweezil, and who's the nimrod that decided we need 44 of them?"<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Blame Frank.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Yes, indeed, I am the infamous and nefarious Croda.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Infamous? Perhaps infamous as in "Oh my, I accidentally soiled myself standing in the reception line at my own wedding." Nefarious? Hah. It is to laugh.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>I dropped in to pay a visit<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Please -- feel free to drop right back out.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>My old buddy Mensch was kind enough to drop me a line to say hullo, so I figured I'd pop in here<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Swell. Now we know who to blame (although, truth be known, he DID mention you in the last incarnation of the thread -- we all just hoped he was joking).

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Somebody get poor Dweezil a copy of Cabbages and Kings so that he can brush up on his Peng.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Been there, done that, found it rather boring (although, when printed on 25% cotton paper and shredded, it DOES make decent kitty litter).

Really, I had expected slightly better from an old fart such as yourself -- instead, however, it appears you are merely a STALE old fart. Unsurprising, but disappointing.

[ 07-11-2001: Message edited by: Dweezil44 ]

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Is there a certain odoriferous scent in the air? What is that pungeunt aroma wafting across the willows and reeds of our quiet pool? Was that a *plunk* I just heard into the sordid waters of the cess?

Could it be another invasion from the outrboards, akin to "Invasion of the Body Snatchers?" Nope, just a buggy eyed little weasil scrabbling around, oops it fell into the pool.

Ahh, I see the gators swirling about, They will help make its stay in the pool brief.

*Chomp*

Buh-bye Fleetwood junior.

[ 07-11-2001: Message edited by: Panzer Leader ]

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Mouse blathered:

Some useless tripe.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Ouch. Ridicule from the ridiculous.

Mouse, you decidedly worthless git, you have no more authority to ridicule your betters than Jiang has to condemn the death penalty.

Go back to your "Buns of Pravolone" or "Undesired, Unnecessary Ego Trip About An Unpublished Game" threads where your adoring Outer Board fans might appreciate you (okay, okay, appreciate is a bit of a stretch, but work with me - I generally dislike kicking puppy dogs so hard; however, an exception in this case is not only warranted, its necessary).

Perhaps you could dazzle us all with your self-indulgent fantasies involving arenas and crowds (although I must say that little bit of prose DID cure my uncle's insomnia, so I suppose you are to be congratulated on that count).

On second thought, don't try to dazzle, just try to disappear.

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by jshandorf:

Gamey bastard.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

who me? no no no no... you must be thinking of someone else. maybe…

*looks around, grabs Mace*

here you want gamey.. take this lad, all chicken! can't get more gamey then that..

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I'd like to provide an update on some of my games. In fact, I'd like specifically to provide an update on my game with The Lawyer Formerly Known as JD...

I'd like to discuss how he parks his tanks in the open.

I'd like to discuss how his infantry clevery move without the benefit of cover.

I'd like to discuss his confusion over not yet finding any of my tanks... which might be due to those F-B's I bought.

I'd like to discuss all this... but it's been days since he sent the fecking turn back and so I can't!!

I'd also like to point out to any SSN's like Vicks44D that Berli makes a wonderful oppo for you first-timers: not only is he a kind, forgiving soul, he will - in the spirit of Christian fellowship - let you take the VL's first and even park his tanks in the open! Ah, what a guileless angel of a man! And his scenarios! My! Only the most pleasant weather matched with gentle, open terrain, just like his wide embrace that welcomes you, the Newbie, into our humble home!

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Croda:

Nice try, but real men get it right the first time, Dweebel.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I couldn't agree more :D

Welcome back Croda, did you have to wait for an Aussie thread to make an appearance though?

Shame on you lad...... ermmmm you're not an Aussie are you? :eek:

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An Aussie, Emma? Perish the thought! I'm American through and through. I'm a Massachusetts guy transplanted into Pennsylvania. And it's a pleasure to hear from you as well.

As for those of you looking for your games...don't hold your breath. Actually, do hold your breath...I'd like to see your lungs blow up. My presence here is in no way a guarantee of games. However, if you're lucky, I may send out a turn or two...or at least some surrenders.

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Iskander:

I'd like to discuss how he parks his tanks in the open.

I'd like to discuss how his infantry clevery [sic] move without the benefit of cover.

I'd like to discuss all this... but it's been days since he sent the fecking turn back and so I can't!!<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Wow! You know, I was just thinking the same thing about you SINCE YOU HAVEN'T RETURNED MY FILES IN OVER A WEEK!!

Geez, just because I was slaughtering your infantry like a pack of somber, red nosed, hungover Eskimos whacking baby seals for beer money, you can't return a file -- all you can do is post some mumbo-jumbo about how you thought you might just have to surrender rather than die any more!

You pathetic excuse for a life-form! SEND ME MY TURN THAT I MAY DISPOSE OF YOU PROPERLY (namely, in a hole in the backyard with a little lime spread on top, preferably sealed later with a new cement patio or something).

[ 07-11-2001: Message edited by: MrSpkr ]

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What a goddamn mess. It looks like I've missed, oh, thirty of these demi-cesspools and now some nitwit named Dweezil is lecturing the order of the glorious Peng on class. Riddle me that, batman. A few points:

1. No, I am still unable to return turns but I do think I have them. As I think posting to the Pool is wholly separate from playing CM, I don't think this is any kind of problem.

B. Why the hell did all the E-mails stop? I'm more than a little worried about the answer to this one but I do need to ask the question. I mean, I get one E-mail from jolly Stuka but other than that, you people didn't even seem to care if I fall off the face of the earth or not. That hurts. A lot. I mean, really, like getting torn into pieces by rabid wombats wielding billy clubs and covered in oregano.

Chuck. How goes the development of CM2? How goes the development of the inglorious pool? What'd I miss?

Anyhoo, I'm sure once things become a leetle less surreal, there will be turns and requests for games and the bile and the taunting and the biting and the horrendous insults regarding your various lineages. By the way, the Cantonese Girlfriend told me that the Chinese have an insult that goes something like, and you have to read this with a twisted Chinese accent, "May your entire family line die." I reserve that for use later.

Ultimate Weapon?

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Kee-rap...Meeks and Croda return on the same day...A sure sign that the appocalypse is upon up. We've already seen it's precursor, the Dweeb-pocalypse quoting from Emily Post: Less crass, more class. And be sure you stick your pinky out when drinking your tea. In the immortal words of Meeks' Sex-Hungry Cantonese Girlfriend and you have to read this with a twisted Chinese accent, "May your entire family line die."

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Iskiss ya drunken sod, you owe me a turn ya delirium tremens poster boy! As for my tactics they speak for themselves.Unfortunely.

As for Meeks (no you never emailed me back so there, or was that from the polar jaunt) good to see you around again. About our game......forget it ever happened Mr UberStuart 37mm death dealing gamey bastard

Croda and Meeks return, the end times are surely upon us. If there is an eclispe I am clearing out.

as for dweezlestick, with all of 5 posts methinks a poseur with some history.....as AquaPutridsuggest perhaps Andreas has returned or not.....he did show some immediate sparks with Croda which fits......hmmm inquiring minds want to know.......we however don't

[ 07-11-2001: Message edited by: jdmorse ]

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