The Peng Challenge: Thread Blunder

[Michael Emrys]

...if you get my point...

I would, but it seems to be firmly attached to the top of your head.

...which they don't have in Ozzieland or at least I don't think they do not being much for winter sports there.

Of course they do. It's when they go water skiing. (Well, they're Ozzies; what can you expect?)

Finally, that strip club ... what was the address for that so I can do some ... uh ... quality control inspections on the business cards.

I sent one of my operatives with a camera (I have far more important things to attend to here at Lord God and Supreme Being Central) to save you the trouble, but the images he brought back were too disgusting to publish here. Doubtlessly they will be right up your alley, you revolting perv.

Michael

[sburke]

So where to begin Ozzies, What's The Ggod Of Them Then? Well I had to confront a couple issues. First off considering the audience, the likelihood they would even have a computer much less Powerpoint is slim to none. My first draft was I realized targeted incorrectly. It was aimed at a 6th grade audience. I realized in retrospect that would pretty much eliminate any chance of it being comprehended here. So I toned it down just a tad.

And so Chapter one, the migration begins.....

By the way for animation roll your mouse scroll wheel back and forth. See the English crowds jumping for joy at the imminent departure of little two tooth?

You are welcome.

[sburke]

Okay slide has been up long enough, so in this slide, do we have a possible answer for the question? Any one, anyone at all? Raise your hand if you have even the slightest thought...okay raise your hand if you aren't dead. Hmm okay we have a few that perhaps should be tossed out the back door...

The answer people is painfully obvious, sheesh. The Ggod of them is they AREN"T HERE. Wow this is gonna be a long 33 slides.

[ng cavscout]

**slow clap**

[Noba]

Actually unconscious is the preferred state.

We prefer you unconscious as well, preferably permanently.

Now, let's begin with something easy ... on the subject ... "Ozzies, What's The Ggod Of Them* Then?."

You could start with something easier as well. Like going back to spelling lessons.** Now we all know the real reason for that stuff up and that is you are old. Almost as old as Emrys, (Spelt, not bolded) and things well, just stop working effectively. Obviously.

As to the supposed subject of this monumental waste of a Squire's time... wait! No that's all right, it should tie him in knots for a long time.

Noba.

* Glad to see you capitalised us.

** Just how did you manage that letter transposition? Your keyboard speshul, or sumfink?

[sburke]

You could start with something easier as well. Like going back to spelling lessons.** Now we all know the real reason for that stuff up and that is you are old. Almost as old as Emrys, (Spelt, not bolded) and things well, just stop working effectively. Obviously.

As to the supposed subject of this monumental waste of a Squire's time... wait! No that's all right, it should tie him in knots for a long time.

Noba.

* Glad to see you capitalised us.

** Just how did you manage that letter transposition? Your keyboard speshul, or sumfink?

Now, let's begin with something easy ... I think a 33 slide PowerPoint, with animation of course, on the subject ... "Ozzies, What's The Ggod Of Them Then?."

Knight Champion of the M.B.T., Justicar for Life of the Peng Challenge Thread, Creator of the Peng Challenge Thread Podcast, CessPool Drain Commissioner and Founder of the Shavian House

1. - I follow directions.

2. - Going back would imply I ever had spelling lessons. I am from Phila. Why would I need that?

3. - Regarding spelling, what is "capitalised"? I know of capitalized, but that is a different... umm spelling.

Oh I get it, it is an Ozzie thing.

https://au.news.yahoo.com/a/24496917/life-insurance-company-used-google-ads-words-to-capitlise-on-mh17-disaster/

Must have been something picked up in Botany Bay Spelling Academy.

[Yeknodathon]

Its like watching Shavian House amoeba reproduce, they could make two posts and fill up a whole freakin' page, its like going through small print on the bottom of a freakin' bank loan form... someone start a wildfire or sumfink!!!

[Michael Emrys]

We prefer you unconscious as well, preferably permanently.

But the real question is whether he has ever been truly conscious. There is no proof that he has ever attained a state of consciousness, any state of consciousness. He is as inert as Silly Putty™ and as clever as roadkill.

Michael

[sburke]

Its like watching Shavian House amoeba reproduce, they could make two posts and fill up a whole freakin' page, its like going through small print on the bottom of a freakin' bank loan form... someone start a wildfire or sumfink!!!

That reproduction aspect bothering you....mule?

[Michael Emrys]

Well I call them as I see them, or in this case don't see them. And it is an "it".

There is an explanation for that. Back in his donkey adolescence he tried to commit an unnatural act with a milking machine and foolishly turn it to "High". The rest, as they say, is history...as were his parts.

Michael

[Noba]

Oh I get it, it is an Ozzie thing.

Nah, the only thing you get is a *Boot*. I do know that an academic many years ago identified the American propensity to replace 'S' with 'Z' in many words stemmed from a copywriter error in a Sesame Street script. It just blossomed from there... who'd have figured, eh?

Noba.

[sburke]

Nah, the only thing you get is a *Boot*. I do know that an academic many years ago identified the American propensity to replace 'S' with 'Z' in many words stemmed from a copywriter error in a Sesame Street script. It just blossomed from there... who'd have figured, eh?

Noba.

Maybe that is how ossify became Ozzie. Cease developing; be stagnant= Ozzie. Yeah that sounds plausible.

capitalise (third-person singular simple present capitalises, present participle capitalising, simple past and past participle capitalised)

Non-Oxford British English standard spelling of capitalize.

So what this seems to be saying is the British going to Oxford essentially learn what you say Americans learn from Sesame Street?

[Joe Shaw]

So where to begin Ozzies, What's The Ggod Of Them Then? Well I had to confront a couple issues. First off considering the audience, the likelihood they would even have a computer much less Powerpoint is slim to none. My first draft was I realized targeted incorrectly. It was aimed at a 6th grade audience. I realized in retrospect that would pretty much eliminate any chance of it being comprehended here. So I toned it down just a tad.

And so Chapter one, the migration begins.....

By the way for animation roll your mouse scroll wheel back and forth. See the English crowds jumping for joy at the imminent departure of little two tooth?

You are welcome.

It's your first attempt lad and as is the case with any employer (I used the term "employer" in the sense that I allow you to live here, not in the sense that I'm actually paying you anything ... which, in the grand scheme of things, probably makes me more of a slumlord than an employer but I digest) it takes time to learn what your Liege expects.

That being said I must point out that when I referred to animation I was referring to the native animation inherent within PowerPoint, not some cheesy mouse trick.

Furtherless I was disturbed by the color difference in the "Englishmen" you portrayed, there are no "isms" allowed here and I fear that you've strayed a bit over the line. Alternatively you could have broken the tip of your black pencil by pressing too hard, a common effect that accompanies the clenched brow, sweaty palms and lip chewing that you no doubt find useful in your "artistic" efforts. You may, therefore, have been forced to use a different color pencil as I'm certain the complexities of actually sharpening a pencil have continued to elude you.

But as a good Liege Lord I also want to commend you on the use of "Gaol" ... that showed promise. Of course you should not take that too much to heart and start labelling everything "Gaol." This is especially true if you know anyone named "Gail" ... I'm told they find that comparison annoying.

But keep up the average work ... how's page two going and don't forget the bullet points.

Your Liege,

Sir Joe Shaw, JFLPCT

[Nidan1]

The rain in Spain lays mainly in the plain.

[sburke]

Wait, there is a way to sharpen pencils?!!!! Wow this internet thing really is a great technology aid. Does it work on pens too? As to the bullet points, I was gonna wait a bit before shooting the Ozzies, should I accelerate that bit?

[Joe Shaw]

Wait, there is a way to sharpen pencils?!!!! Wow this internet thing really is a great technology aid. Does it work on pens too? As to the bullet points, I was gonna wait a bit before shooting the Ozzies, should I accelerate that bit?

It's ... no see it's ... {sigh}.

[Yeknodathon]

... how's page two going and don't forget the bullet to the head.

Er, a bit harsh but if one must... there is a fairly good chance he might miss?

[sburke]

okay enough of the question and answer period. Moving along to Ozzie contributions to the great debates of humanity

I had an animation here on procreation, but it got censored. No not because it depicted sex. It was felt the Ozzie version was simply too disgusting. You'll have to take that up with HR. I find their position contradictory as it seems that strip club dive featured Oddstralian acts. No wonder they had the coupons just lying around.

[sburke]

Okay now does anyone notice the apparent discrepancy in the above slide. Anyone? Anyone at all?

[sburke]

Okay too subtle eh? Or simply illiteracy rates here are even higher than expected....

See if you can figure out by the response on inquiring from our source. Unfortunately this does require reading. Somehow I think this is not going to improve the situation.

From Ancestry.com

Dear Mr sburke, Squire of the Shavian house etc etc

We apologize for the apparent discrepancy in our documentation however we have found that there are two opposing strains in determining ancestor and descendant amongst Oddstralians based on DNA evidence. On the one hand evolution would seem to ensure survival of the fittest. On the other the limited gene pool (and we mean that in both senses, small and of deficient quality) has also had a negative impact on evolutionary progress. Current studies indicate that the fitter specimens in Oddstralian society went out to provide food for their offspring and frequently then became food for other creatures of the continent. The survivors were not better hunters it seems but simply cowards who went around and hid behind the gaol all day (usually in a bar, but sometimes in assorted refuse cans) and then returned in the evening claiming to have found nothing. They then proceeded to eat the young smart enough to notice they had alcohol on their breath. So you see it becomes a very confusing cycle to determine from genetic material what the hell is going on there. Add to that the constant mixing up of the same genes through generations within the same gene pool. Several generations of the same family living under the same roof... I don't believe I need to spell that out for you do I? If you are familiar with the character of Craster in Game of Thrones all will become clear. In fact we believe Craster was modeled on Oddstralian society from a visit George R R Martin made to the benighted place. Such behavior makes it even harder to identify DNA development. The term we use is DNA recycling.

Yours sincerely, Director of Oddstralian studies - Ancestry.com

By the way, you know anyone hiring in the genetics industry? My current position is useless towards any understanding of genetics and normal humanity. My findings here are only causing me to drink more heavily. It is so depressing.

[Baneman]

Congratulations - you now make as little sense as anyone else posting here and thus "belong".

[sburke]

Congratulations - you now make as little sense as anyone else posting here and thus "belong".

Thanks. It was an effort to dumb down this presentation to required levels. That I was apparently successful is it's own reward. No need to thank me with monetary gifts, but I wouldn't refuse them either.

[Boo Radley]

I am from Phila.

Oh, Peng should be informed.

We have another escapee.

[Joe Shaw]

I am wroth with NG Cavscout, wroth indeed. On those rare occasions when I've lost games of CM I've made some of my best posts, but he has selfishly refused to provide me that opportunity.

We had two games going, one in Red Thunder and another in Market Garden and I had hoped that for once he might develop a modicum of tactical ability and I might have the opportunity to craft another of my all too rare concession posts.

But NOOOOOoooo ... He had to lose them both to me, the swine.

I'm just so ... Wroth right now.

[Joe Shaw]

Thanks. It was an effort to dumb down this presentation to required levels. That I was apparently successful is it's own reward. No need to thank me with monetary gifts, but I wouldn't refuse them either.

Well of course any monetary rewards go to the Shavian House coffers for .... Uh ... Upkeep and ... Uh ... Stuff.

I also have to point out that you apparently failed to carefully study Vols. IV -VI of The Annals of the Shavian House, required reading, it was in the syllabus. Had you read that carefully you'd have noticed that Your Liege made the point many years ago that the Ozzies were proof of the existence of retrograde evolution. Your latest slide would seem to indicate otherwise.