37mm

*drops a large chunk of charred pig fat onto the Ladies plates* I suppose that’s fineydoodle… suit’s me infact… I’ve still got a WHOLE load of dogma to teach… plus I'm looking for a donkey *trotters back to the raging inferno*

But, but… but what about my martyrdom? ... sigh *starts polishing his butt & walks towards the swine about to be porked*

Martyrdom here I come (again)... Peng soon I'll be truly blessed (plus I’ll no longer have to put up with that total feckwit v42below)!

I don't need saving... indeed I'm the ONLY one who doesn't require saving

You know I like this Justicar… I’m not too sure where she stands on the conflicting relationship between Pengless bureaucratic empire-building and Pengful witty, hatred & vitriol but still she seems a marked improvement on the old one… hmmm… Perhaps it’s time for Joe to leave these lands & *cough* ascend *cough* to the wilderness with the other Olde ones? Either that or make him the Mutha Beautiful Scribe & keeper of a ship shape website (which nobody is sending newsletters to… looks like YET ANOTHER thing for ME to do… sigh)

'mad as a tree full of rats'… who could tell? Any way’s didn't our former Justicar banish him to Nottingham or sumfink?

Do you EVER get bored of writing that?

Oh I’m sorry have I entered the ‘rub v42below thread’ (yikes that’d be one Mutha Awful Thread)? No feckwit… this is the Peng CHALLENGE thread! I’ve challenged your contemptible little ass in considerable style & you’ve declined (I would’ve said it was due to me being so intimidating except it sounds like you’re running scared of the Belgian as well) in a manner that must upset all the watching squires & SSN’s (Is she REALLY a Knight mom?). You should be thankful that I speak to you at all… if on some occasions what I say amounts to only a paragraph you shouldn’t be like… “Oh no! The sky is falling, why can’t he write to me more? I’m so lonely” Instead you should be like… “Yippee! I was ignored & now I’m not, let me savour every single word… for one is infinitely greater than zero” So rejoice you puny, delicate, skirt wearing, sheep shagger for I’ve not forgotten you (yet) like so many others have (Peng some people have ALL the luck)… [ March 10, 2005, 07:50 PM: Message edited by: Sir 37mm ]

Hatred update 5.30pm Monday evening to 11.30pm Wednesday evening… One great seething ocean of hate. Oh sure I did ‘other’ things; I slept a little, I ate a fair bit, I drank adequately & I gathered some results but essentially they were mere distractions from my true purpose which is to love Peng & hate all unsaved folk. V42below has been vexing me… the lily livered, ‘please don’t shout at me 37mm’, stool sniffer (and I’m not talking about the carpentry kind) has seemingly been ‘rejuvenated’ by my insults. He now writes a few things that are almost interesting… only the things about me of course The Dear Lady Morraine has been vexing me… why can’t I have my turn? The Dearest Lady Y2K has been vexing me… “and has been on a mission to take over the MBT since he began posting” Take over? I’ve been sent by Peng to save us all & keep the Cesspool as it should be*… a malign & festering sore seeping putrid hatred & rage. Every post I write, every word I utter, every thought I form is fated to bring us ALL (yes even rleete) closer to the ‘golden age'… HOWEVER... ...I’m also a Knight of the House of (sigh) JDMorse (sigh) & my secular responsibilities prompted me to offer my service to the Justicar (despite our religious differences) if this is now deemed to be trying to ‘take over’ then I’m greatly saddened. *shakes head solemnly as if the whole world has gone mad* The Justicar has been vexing me… why are you so surprised that Seanachai STILL wants to end your tyranny? Did he not try to install a benign & loved King years ago? Lars has been vexing me… Harold (spelt but not bolded) has been washed in the Blessed Holy Water of Peng (which reminds me, O' great & lurking lord you’re late on delivery… if this keeps up I’ll have to supply my own Holy Water!) he can not possibly serve as a scepter *alternatively I’ve been sent to herald in the coming apocalypso and to punish you all for not hating Canadians enough but I try not to mention that possibility…

Well derr [that by the way is the really annoying sound that young yank's make in those Peng awful high school movies], ain't that the point? As for the hatred update v42below, it is an UPDATE not a 'regular as clockwork' blog. I've adopted Harold (spelt but not bolded) as a disciple… a pretty fine fellow really

So you examine stools. This explains many things. </font>

My expectations were abysmal and rightfully so… Do you mind if I take up Harold (spelt but not bolded) as one of my disciples?

Ahh yes you're (for once) right *puts arm around the v42below’s shoulder* let’s return to that damned place

Justicar Joe wrote... You don’t mind if I take that as yet another title, do you? I’m starting to have difficulty in keeping track of them all [ March 07, 2005, 04:41 PM: Message edited by: Sir 37mm ]

Hah you call those insults? They're BARELY worthy of the Waffles… so (and forgive me if I’ve gotten the wrong end of the stick… which is presumably the left end) now that it’s confirmed that PBEM wont be in the next Combat Mission can we ask will CmXii feature new & improved Peng Challenge features?

Justicar Joe wrote... I’d offer my services… but it could be dangerous merging the secular hierarchy with the religious hierarchy. Still I’m overly qualified for the task… I turn up at all the wrong hours in relation to the yanks, I’m often drunk and I’m ALWAYS cranky, I’ve been trained (if it can be described as such) by your former helper and I might be able to find time to bust v42below to SSN… Heck with traits like that do I even need to send in my CV? PS I’m the only one who actually noticed (and I suspect EVER notices) your post

I know! It's kewl, and by "kewl" I mean totally sweet! I hear - if you feed them right - with time they turn into half-decent mortal enemies. Either that or die a slow and painful death, which can't be all that bad to watch either. </font>

You shower for 13 hours? Even if you don't, SNIPPED because it didn't concern me... enough </font>

I don't understand... something wrong with my perfect post? [ March 07, 2005, 03:55 PM: Message edited by: Sir 37mm ]

Hatred update… Yesterday morning 2 to 5am… couldn’t sleep and drinking the lab ethanol doesn’t seem to be helping, why won’t Seanachai answer my questions? Perhaps I should’ve mentioned the rifle butt fantasies? Yesterday morning 5 to11.30 am… I sleep dreaming of rifle butt’s & v42below Yesterday shower time 11.30am to 12.30pm… daydream about v42below slipping in the shower & cracking his head on the end of my rifle butt… Yesterday afternoon 12.30 to 2.30pm… I see that v42below has posted, I cannot tell you how much each & every detested word vexes me… I’d probably detest it only slightly less if he said the words I want to here ‘Doorknocker PLEASE put down the rifle & why’ve you got it the wrong way round?’ Yesterday afternoon 2.30 to 5.30pm… had a walk with friends, fed some duck’s, released a balloon… all spoilt by the crowds. I kept on seeing v42below… a fleeting glimpse here… a grinning inanity there… a shadow behind a shadow… all very disturbing… I wish I had my rifle… or a rifle Yesterday evening 5.30 to 9.00pm… Went to pub with friends… beer, crisps, pool… you know I don’t think a pool cue would be as much fun as a rifle butt Yesterday evening 9 to 12.30 am… I finish writing up some results but everything’s odd… According to the graph there is no optimum time for splitting open v42below’s neural cavity with a series of heavy dull impacts… This morning 12.30 to 4am… v42below wants to make me village idiot… he thinks flattery will get him anywhere? I’m STILL going to ‘release his potential’ with some major hot butt play… err rifle butt play This morning 4 to 9am… sleep, maybe I need more sleep… it can’t be healthy… well it sure beats having your brains beaten out I’d imagine This day 9am to 5pm… lot’s of staining, lot’s of hanging around, lot’s of waiting for my stain’s to develop, a bit of a quiet day really, what with all the staining & all… still it gave me lot’s of time to not think about v42below’s face & my butt… lot’s of time This evening 5pm to now… travelled home & wrote this, this thing… I think I’m getting better now… Peng that is one hell of an awful newbie… you need a Messiah pal? Cos I need a flock… sigh [ March 07, 2005, 03:42 PM: Message edited by: Sir 37mm ]

You're just jealous I've got the closest thing to a mortal enemy since you had Cabron69 and a Knight of the Pool, no less. Well actually he is less than that, much less. If only Joe had a spine, I wouldn't have to avoid typing that idiot's name (not Joe's, the fact that Joe is an idiot goes without saying) so as not to give him the honour of bolding it. </font>

Seanachai I may be the Messiah & you may be a fecking wi… a feckiwi… a feck wit… but I understand my weaknesses & my strength’s & I understand your own… I don’t have many of the former of course but I do know that you understand hatred. It began… I don’t know a few months ago… twas an initial fling really at first a slap, a tickle, a giggle… but oh how has it developed. I’m consumed Seanachai… totally Last night I couldn’t sleep… every synapse, every space of my being was full of sheer, complete, total & absolute loathing… I don’t understand… we’re talking about ME… the fecking Messiah And v42below… the… the thing… that has a… v… in its name Why can’t I hate you or Joe or my liege or that triple damned Nu-Yoika? Why can’t I hate someone deserving of my hate? The twisted ‘my 56mm penetrating column is impotent’ feckwit Grog’ole Dorosh or perhaps… I don’t know… that Belgian (I know, I know he may be a piece of hippy Eurotrash but still… compare that fecker with v42below) or maybe… that other person… the one with the limp… Oh who am I kidding… I don’t CARE about any of those skidmark sniffing grave diggers… I ONLY care about v42below and WHY? WHY? WHY? How can such an unworthy *sigh* man *sigh*… deserve so much WASTED hatred?

Oh don't worry it's nothing like what Dalem would get up to... I'm sure the Belgian will happily inform you of how much pain an 88 can give... even to one such as I As to Joe I consider myself in a truce with him & have held off my righteous attempts to impeach him... you can however bicker amongst yourselves till he ire’s me so

Although it pain’s me like an 88 shell I have to say that the Justicar (Peng I hate using that title) is… I suppose he… I mean it appears as if… Joe Shmoe is right (thank Peng it's unlikely that I’ll be called to say that again)… The Wart from Ninny should SOD OFF… or get himself an account I mean how complicated can it be?