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Stuka

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Posts posted by Stuka

  1. You really are a little warped aren't you? Now put the pliers down and go do something productive, like trying to develop a translation dictionary for Donkey's gibberish.

    How dare you speak to me directly!

    I am an Olde One of the Cesspool and you will observe the proper formalities. i.e. appropriate fawning, tugging of forelock and general toadyism.

    Now, go and burn a stick of incense at the altar of the shrine of Stuka. If you don't know the way just follow Emrys, he spends most of his day there, prostrate and mewling at my golden idol. He won't leave you room at the altar as he wants me 'all to himself' (yes, icky I know but you just can't get decent stalkers these days) so you will have to put the boot in a few times.

    P.S. don't forget the donation box. Upkeep on shrines is hell these days.

  2. I'll bet there's a distinct possibility she might fart towards him.

    Many years ago I was doing barwork in the UK and a young lady co-worker decided to inform me that she had to fart. Being cheeky I asked her to let it rip. Now perhaps due to my youth and (thankfully) inexperience in the finer points of female farting I was anticipating a light, high-pitched, possibly melodic release but instead she screwed her face up, tensed and released a volumous trouser belch that would have made a sailor blush. Truly it was like Satan trumpeting his demons back to hell.

    And no sburke, I didn't wait around to see what it smelled like...you perv.

  3. I attribute that to YOUR lack of presence here Nidan1.

    I'm afraid that was my fault. Nidan1 has been busy towing his gutted AFV hulks off the battlefield and patting down the turf on the newly dug mass grave for his troops. Individual graves were taking too long to dig as the body count exceeded even his own personal best in cannon-fodder expenditure.

    Ergo...I won...a lot.

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