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Joe Shaw

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Everything posted by Joe Shaw

  1. Good thought sburke, it's about time the useless Bastiche makes himself useful around here. Mind you it might well be more of a task than he can handle. Your Liege, Sir Joe Shaw JFLPCT
  2. Oh I say, well done lad. Now this is a pre battle taunt worthy of the name. Do well and do honor to the Shavian House. Of course you still have the PowerPoint to complete, you wouldn't want an "incomplete" on your transcript now would you. Your Liege, Sir Joe Shaw JFLPCT
  3. Hmm, not bad, not good mind you but not bad. I like the pre-game justification regardless of the actual game outcome. Then, when you lose, you can always refer back to this post and show yourself as prescient. Of course you immediately ruin it with the "so there take that" but baby steps, baby steps. You might want to review some of my recent posts regarding the two games with NG Cavscout that I won. In your case you'll have make allowances for your outcome as you'll be losing but it will give you some good ideas about how to craft a good taunting AAR. Why am I giving YOU tips when sburke is my Squire? I'd remind you of the OP, we couldn't care less who actually wins the game, oh certainly we'll mercilessly mock the loser but there'll be a fair amount of mocking for the winner too. It's the quality of the posts HERE that matter and it's by those posts that your worth shall be determined.
  4. TECHNICALLY he's an "Other Recognized" ... one of the more stupid ideas the Olde Ones came up with for some reason. The other was letting Ozzies in ... Joe
  5. I'm beginning to think that my divination plan was too limited. Instead of trying to discern his meaning from ... uh ... "material" ejected from him, we should go directly to the source and get his entrails. Even if we couldn't decide what a given post actually meant, it would be his last post.
  6. sburke lad, we have a task for you. I request and require you to teach this SSN some manners. I'll need you to play him in a game of CM of some fashion, CMRT, CMMG, one of the newer incarnations. But for the luv of Gawd make it short. We expect AARs promptly and, mark me here, with some flair and wit. Based upon his initial post you'll have to be the one providing that since he's clearly not the sharpest knife in the fabled silverware drawer. As we'll no doubt have to suffer through HIS AARs as well, short is better. Thrash him sir, thrash him mightily and in the process remind him that I am The Beloved Justicar for Life of the Peng Challenge Thread and he'll damned well show some respect or we'll know the reason why. You might also mention that it's the duty of said Beloved Justicar for Life of the Peng Challenge Thread to anoint Serfs, Squires and so forth and if he has any aspirations to such he might ameliorate his tone. Damned SSNs ... There ought to be a bounty on them.
  7. Ah Michael, I am YOUR Beloved Justicar of the Peng Challenge Thread too. Don't feel neglected, for I am here for the least of those who belong to the M.B.T. ... and heaven knows you fit that bill.
  8. Nope, how could it ... I am YOUR Beloved Justicar for Life of the Peng Challenge Thread. Who could aspire to something greater?
  9. Do you know the way to San Jose, la da da da da da da Dah da Dah.
  10. Let's see, what WAS the final result of that game? Let me check my records ... yes, yes I see it again ... it was a Soviet VICTORY, minor to be sure but a victory none the less. As to the commander of the Tiger ... I had no idea ... I'm told that there are medications that might help however. And again you fail to even mention the Market Garden scenario which saw one of your tanks killed by a PIAT, two others by my ONLY tank and a fourth by plain old fashioned Tommies without an AT weapon to their name. That one, if memory serves, was a MAJOR Victory. So you may obfuscate all you wish my friend, but the ledger is heavily weighted to my side at present. Joe
  11. Screenshots or it didn't happen Nidan1. I personally don't recall a single instance of the phenomena you describe.
  12. Well Michael at least I have the gumption to play actual people and then own up to the result here in public.
  13. It's a foregone conclusion NG Cavscout, there's no need to wait for CM to confirm what we already know. And, of course, you completely fail to mention the MG game which HAS been officially terminated.
  14. Well of course any monetary rewards go to the Shavian House coffers for .... Uh ... Upkeep and ... Uh ... Stuff. I also have to point out that you apparently failed to carefully study Vols. IV -VI of The Annals of the Shavian House, required reading, it was in the syllabus. Had you read that carefully you'd have noticed that Your Liege made the point many years ago that the Ozzies were proof of the existence of retrograde evolution. Your latest slide would seem to indicate otherwise.
  15. I am wroth with NG Cavscout, wroth indeed. On those rare occasions when I've lost games of CM I've made some of my best posts, but he has selfishly refused to provide me that opportunity. We had two games going, one in Red Thunder and another in Market Garden and I had hoped that for once he might develop a modicum of tactical ability and I might have the opportunity to craft another of my all too rare concession posts. But NOOOOOoooo ... He had to lose them both to me, the swine. I'm just so ... Wroth right now.
  16. It's your first attempt lad and as is the case with any employer (I used the term "employer" in the sense that I allow you to live here, not in the sense that I'm actually paying you anything ... which, in the grand scheme of things, probably makes me more of a slumlord than an employer but I digest) it takes time to learn what your Liege expects. That being said I must point out that when I referred to animation I was referring to the native animation inherent within PowerPoint, not some cheesy mouse trick. Furtherless I was disturbed by the color difference in the "Englishmen" you portrayed, there are no "isms" allowed here and I fear that you've strayed a bit over the line. Alternatively you could have broken the tip of your black pencil by pressing too hard, a common effect that accompanies the clenched brow, sweaty palms and lip chewing that you no doubt find useful in your "artistic" efforts. You may, therefore, have been forced to use a different color pencil as I'm certain the complexities of actually sharpening a pencil have continued to elude you. But as a good Liege Lord I also want to commend you on the use of "Gaol" ... that showed promise. Of course you should not take that too much to heart and start labelling everything "Gaol." This is especially true if you know anyone named "Gail" ... I'm told they find that comparison annoying. But keep up the average work ... how's page two going and don't forget the bullet points. Your Liege, Sir Joe Shaw, JFLPCT
  17. To be sure there's not a lot of difference between your average Cannahockian (and actually an AVERAGE Cannahockian is well ABOVE the average there if you get my point) and your average sub-human Ozzie, but to answer your question specifically, Ozzies like to mix it up so you can't really tell but it's more common to find a Cannahockian without the two front teeth due to puck damage which they don't have in Ozzieland or at least I don't think they do not being much for winter sports there. The above run on sentence was brought to you courtesy of the letters W, T and F. As to the business cards I blame Boo Radley ... but then I blame Boo Radley for pretty much everything so it may not have been his fault ... but just for giggles lets blame him anyway. Finally, that strip club ... what was the address for that so I can do some ... uh ... quality control inspections on the business cards. Really finally, you might consider sneaking a camera into that club and taking some shots to spice up the PowerPoint. Your Liege, Sir Joe Shaw, JFLPCT p.s. Much better on the sig line.
  18. sburke I am disappointed, this is NOT the way to begin your tenure with The Shavian House. First, your sig still says SERF ... I'd have thought that you, transported with joy, would have fixed that first. Second though, we're talking about a presentation to the CESSPOOL! If it doesn't have flashy graphics, animation and bullet points, how can you hope to keep them engaged and not distracted by the occassional shiny ribbon that floats by. Of COURSE PowerPoint makes them stupid, but in this instance we can't set the bar much lower now can we. Your Liege, Sir Joe Shaw, JFLPCT
  19. Actually unconscious is the preferred state. I tell you lad, despite your recent hiccup with the divination I'll take into account the material you had to deal with and acknowledge that perhaps, just perhaps, there was NO meaning to be derived from his post. Certainly that would fit in with his history of posts. I've said it before and I'll say it again, my judgement on the worthiness of applicants is infallible ... as long as I'm given a Mulligan in the case of Papa Khann. Therefore, by the power vested in me by ... Well in this case by me mostly ... As I have rights of First Refusal. I do hereby claim you as a Squire in the Shavian House ... so congratulations Squire sburke ... You may put down your Pissbucket and begin your instruction in the duties and obligations that may, in the fullness of time, see you acknowledged as a Knight of the Cesspool. Now, let's begin with something easy ... I think a 33 slide PowerPoint, with animation of course, on the subject ... "Ozzies, What's The Ggod Of Them Then?."
  20. Well I liked the Louisville Slugger, that showed some real initiative and, let's face it, it was a real giggle. But I'm concerned that you spent so much time contemplating his anatomy, not that there's anything wrong with that. I'm afraid you may have gotten personally involved and that calls your judgement into question, I tell you this in my role as your counselor and hopefully you can improve in the future.
  21. We're not interested in excuses here lad ... well it does depend on the quality of the excuse, if it's really good then we probably do care, but in this case we don't. I want a divination damnit.
  22. sburke (spelt but not bolded) are you sleeping on the job? This is just the type of nonsense post I was hoping you'd be able to make some sense from. Don't disappoint me on this lad.
  23. Subtle huh ... Is that what the kids these days are calling being stupid?
  24. And this from someone who hasn't, after all these years, managed to handle UBB code correctly. Brilliant. Joe
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