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The Peng Challenge Thread (By Popular Demand)


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Well, considering some of you boneheads actually thought it would be OK to do Cthulhu-esqe chanting and invoking of the olde ones... it's no big surprise that one shows up! :rolleyes: Do we need to secure the kitchen cabinet doors and shockproof all the outlets around this pitiful joint as well?

Now- you guys summoned it, so it's all your responsiblility to take care of it from here on out, right? Right.

Jeez.

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I'm going to take 'Fat and Stupid' for points, Noba.

'Showing up and caring as an Old One of the Peng Challenge Thread' to win.

It occurs to me, Noba, that I haven't told you that I love you, lately.

C'mere and gie us a hug, you big Aussie bastard!

Imagine my arms slapping you on the back, and my ancient, grizzled cheek rubbing against yours, not to mention my belly bumping up against yours.

Now, tell me something about your life, a true thing, something you wouldn't otherwise share with these fools.

And I'll tell you something, too.

I'm sorry, but Fat and Stupid is definitey worth more than a fake Caring and Sharing routine. Trying to rip sincerity off Lawyers and Politicians, plus Real Estate Agents, Bankers, Car Dealers.... you get my point, doesn't cut the mustard. You need to be more inventive. Fat and Stupid is still the leader.

There's actually something I like about you, too. But I can assure you rubbing up against your gut is not one of them. (Although I think you had better make a wide berth around the paddock). I know, I did say "berth" when I could have used "girth", but that would be just too cruel.

No, it's your simple approach to life. Your love of your betters knows no bounds. You're like the slobbering Labrador that wipes itself all over everyone and anything all the time thrashing the air with it's fat tail, killing and maiming children - and the furniture on it's ride through life.

Did I mention predictability? Like-wise with the Lab as with you... we know exactly what your whining and moaning will be about as soon as we see your post. It's all about you, isn't it? You're the precursor, the excuse Generation X (or is it Y?) use to complain that the world owes them something.

Something I would tell you, but not the rest of the world ? Nah, there's no such thing as compartmented secrets. Once uttered, never recalled.

Mind you, I do have a passion for women with tattoos.

Noba.

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my ancient, grizzled cheek rubbing against yours, not to mention my belly bumping up against yours.

Given the height difference I would expect Seanachais's belly would be rubbing up against Noba's knees and his grizzled cheek would be rubbing against...nevermind.

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Fail.

Epic Fail.

That to took you way to long to spot the obvious opening left for you by Foole Radley.

Noba.

And that to took you way to long ... you probably spent fifteen minutes to "craft" that reply and you still screwed it up.

Australians ... there should be a bounty.

Joe

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On the other hand, if there was a user's fee we could probably write off the deficit in a week. But of course you'd need someone to point that out to you.

Michael

Not at all Michael ... I'm firmly behind the concept of charging you a users fee to post here.

Joe

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Aussie Santa Claus.

Breaks into your house, raids the fridge, steals all your stuff and uses your guest towels for toilet paper.

Christmas isn't really very well received down there, I hear.

I use kangaroos to pull the sleigh - the pouches sure handy for stashing the loot. Not that I'd get anything worth keeping from Boo's. Although the bio-tech outfits here would pay a premium for the new and wondrous diseases I could isolate there. Hmm.... Santa's going to be wearing a biohazard suit this year Boo. Leave beer and a chop instead of milk and cookies and you won't wake up with your hand in a bucket of tepid... well, tepid, anyway.

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ALERTS TO TERROR THREATS IN 2011!

The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist threats and have therefore raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved."

Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross."

The English have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies nearly ran out.

Terrorists have been re-categorized from "Tiresome" to "A Bloody Nuisance."

The last time the English issued a "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was in 1588, when threatened by the Spanish Armada.

The Scots have raised their threat level from "Pissed Off" to "Let's get the Bastards."

They don't have any other levels. This is the reason they have been used on the front line of the British army for the last 300 years

The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide."

The only two higher levels in France are "Collaborate" and "Surrender."

The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France's white flag factory, effectively paralyzing the country's military capability.

Italy has increased the alert level from "Shout Loudly and Excitedly" to "Elaborate Military Posturing"

Two more levels remain: "Ineffective Combat Operations" and "Change Sides."

The Germans have increased their alert state from "Disdainful Arrogance" to "Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs."

They also have two higher levels: "Invade a Neighbor" and "Lose."

Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual; the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels.

The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy.

These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.

Australia, meanwhile, has raised its security level from "No worries" to "She'll be alright, Mate."

Two more escalation levels remain: "Crikey! I think we'll need to cancel the barbie this weekend!" and "The barbie is canceled."

So far no situation has ever warranted use of the final escalation level.

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Leave beer and a chop instead of milk and cookies and you won't wake up with your hand in a bucket of tepid... well, tepid, anyway.

Tepid... Costard?

Is there any other kind?

Just out of curiosity, since, in our present game, your big, bad 150mm gun can't reach my men, will you continue to shell your own men?

I find it a curious pastime.

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Fail.

Epic Fail.

That to took you way to long to spot the obvious opening left for you by Foole Radley.

Noba.

Fail Noba? Something you, my cesspool friend have altogether too much in common with it would seem. Go back to polishing those tarnished laurels and brown-nosing the Foole's opening.

Pudknocker.

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