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Marlon Brando, the PENG CHALLENGE and me


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Originally posted by Joe Shaw:

As to DjB's status in the 'Pool, it was resolved at the end of the previous thread when he, with all due respect, volunteered to start the next thread in order to save us all from another of Panzyweeder's bleatings.

To which, I responded:

[ July 31, 2002, 11:22 PM: Message edited by: Moriarty ]

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Originally posted by Leeo:

This recorded message when I call my ISP for support:

"You are no longer worthy enough to be served by us. You are a pox upon the face of the internet, and we no longer want to enable your ethanol induced ravings. Please take this opportunity to die-lots-now, and bother us not again."

Bastiges.

How DARE those sodding plagiarists! Everyone here has been saying JUST THAT for the last 50 aeons.

Especially the bit about "DIE-LOTS-NOW".

Would you fancy some of that in your current state of mindlesness FooLeeo?? Hmmmm??? I can whip you up a real doozy in no time at all, at all, free of charge like.

So, call me anytime, Big Boy. You really look like ya could do with a damned good Flossing..

Sir AJ

{Official Homepage: www.Modesty.Inc.com}

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I would just like to take this opportunity to announce that MrsPkr is in nominal command of an extremely lucky Stuart.

Oh, and I have access from home again. I hope that makes all of you choke. New addy in the profile (if any of you groin-scratchers can free a hand long enough to click on something other than thumbnails).

Did I hear a buzzing sound from the Southern Hemisphere?

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Originally posted by Doug Beman:

Mace, will you PLEASE clean up after your animals?

Sorry but are you someone worth paying attention to?

Probably not. *shrugs*

Please direct all concerns re the sheep to my squire, Simon. He will then be only too happy to clean up those 'prairie oysters' (and no doubt serve them up to the others as 'saltanas')

Mace

[ August 01, 2002, 04:06 AM: Message edited by: Mace ]

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Originally posted by Leeo:

Did I hear a buzzing sound from the Southern Hemisphere?

Oh, I expect that's just the "Ozzie Buzz Bomb" that will lob into your e-box shortly.

Translated by Seanachai as:

"At wood bae beest ifn' ye poot yer jammy fingers in yer ears, shoot yer ayes an' kissed yer spooty arse gudbye.......mate."

AJ

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Originally posted by: Alex Trebek Geier

Marlon Brando, the PENG CHALLENGE and me

Oh! Oh!

*BUZZZ*

Trebek-Geier: First to buzz in Herr Oberst

Herr Oberst: What are three things that are vulgar, ignorant, and a threat to all that is gentle and civilized in our culture.

Trebek-Geier: Correct!

Herr Oberst: I'd like Idjits of the Cesspool for 200...

Trebek-Geier: This SSN...

*BUZZZ*

Herr Oberst: Who is Mike.

Trebek-Geier: Correct!

Herr Oberst: I'd like Persephone's Best Photos for 1000...

Trebek-Geier: This photo showed a Pythonesque quest we would all like to undertake...

*BUZZZ*

Herr Oberst: What is a photo of nude Emma hiding behind a shrubbery.

Trebek-Geier: Correct!

Herr Oberst: I'd like Olde Ones of the Cesspool for 400...

Trebek-Geier: This Olde One bears an uncanny resemblance to what former Soviet Leader...

*BUZZZ*

Herr Oberst: Who are Berli and Lenin, especially during the winter.

Trebek-Geier: Correct! Only one category left.

*sigh*

Herr Oberst: I'll take The Cesspool Downunder for 200...

Trebek-Geier: This is the major industry...

*BUZZZ*

Herr Oberst: What is sheep farming.

Trebek-Geier: Correct!

Herr Oberst: The Cesspool Downunder for 400...

Trebek-Geier: Mace and AussieJeff recently double-dated with this...

*BUZZZ*

Herr Oberst: Who are two sheep.

Trebek-Geier: Correct!

Herr Oberst: The Cesspool Downunder for 600...

Trebek-Geier: This is the major import...

*BUZZZ*

Herr Oberst: What is velcro.

Trebek-Geier: Correct!

Herr Oberst: The Cesspool Downunder for 800...

Trebek-Geier: This famous movie scene caused widespread riots in Australia when the film was first released in 1972...

*BUZZZ*

Herr Oberst: What is the sheep scene in Everything you always wanted to know about sex.

Trebek-Geier: Correct!

Herr Oberst: The Cesspool Downunder for 1000...

Trebek-Geier: Name a place down-under where no self-respecting man would be caught dead.

*BUZZZ*

Herr Oberst: What is the Royal Womens Hospital.

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Oh the Aussies and Swedes regale us with their rapier wit! The charm, the style, the elegance of multiple flatulence barbs in a row.

Perhaps I should get a new squire -- Beman! Front and center! Take off that stupid paper hat Moriarty made you -- no, no, it never made you a kanigget -- it only entitles you to a free drink at your local Burger King.

Your fledgling attempt at the Rules shows great promise, as does your ability to drive Hiram Sedai insane (or at least, make him crazier than he already is).

You shall serve as my squire, a scion of the Ananias branch of House Bard. You shall wallow in the filth of serfdom no longer, but shall rise above your peers like the floating chunky bit in the 'Pool that you are.

Justicar! Make it so!

Squire Beman, for your first assignment, draft a fifteen page essay, single space, on the topic "Aussies and Swedes: Separated at Birth or Just Sharing a Single Brain?"

We shall discuss the details of your Squirely quest at a future date.

Steve

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Originally posted by MrSpkr:

Perhaps I should get a new squire -- Beman! Front and center! Take off that stupid paper hat Moriarty made you -- no, no, it never made you a kanigget -- it only entitles you to a free drink at your local Burger King.

Your fledgling attempt at the Rules shows great promise, as does your ability to drive Hiram Sedai insane (or at least, make him crazier than he already is).

You shall serve as my squire, a scion of the Ananias branch of House Bard. You shall wallow in the filth of serfdom no longer, but shall rise above your peers like the floating chunky bit in the 'Pool that you are.

Justicar! Make it so!

Squire Beman, for your first assignment, draft a fifteen page essay, single space, on the topic "Aussies and Swedes: Separated at Birth or Just Sharing a Single Brain?"

We shall discuss the details of your Squirely quest at a future date.

Steve

Reporting for duty SAH! I shall spew such bile as never before seen from a Squire of any House. Permission to continue whomping up on such lowlies as Mike, athkattle, and the like?

DjB

[ August 01, 2002, 08:47 AM: Message edited by: Doug Beman ]

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Originally prematurely ejaculated by Doug Beman:

Reporting for duty SAH!

Shaddap, _serf_, *boot*.You're not a Squire until approved by the Justicar, and I doubt you'll pass his mustard. Besides, who would want to be the squire of MrRgrs anyway? ...won't you be, please won't you be, won't you be my neighbor?

Hi neighbor :)

Now if you'll excuse me I have to go barf now.

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Beman, note CMPlayer's post for your research. It rather supports one hypothesis, doesn't it?

Oh, and while we are waiting for Joe to arise from his beauty sleep (shudder), bring me that hollow meatsac Mikey calls a brain. On a silver platter. Preferably diced.

Steve

[ August 01, 2002, 09:06 AM: Message edited by: MrSpkr ]

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Originally posted by Croda:

A title good enough to make even me post in what has become a pale reminder of the greateness of the Peng Threads of Old.

Aren't you just the mewling twit of condescension? Mister Hand-Wringing "Dear me, Oh my, what has become of my former stomping grounds? You fellows just aren't up to snuff anymore. I could try to improve things by spewing some bile, but I've been up to my armpits in the effluence of newborns and can't be bothered to do more than occasionally show up and castigate you for your failure to meet my expectations."

Why don't you get a radio talk show so you can bitch and complain about the state of the union instead of rolling up your sleeves and doing something about it, Hmm? While you're at it, perhaps you can start bitching about the way the cover art on CMBB isn't up to snuff?

I'll give you a pale imitation. You are a pale imitation of someone who participates. You are a pale imitation of conscious thought. You are a pale imitation of a sea sponge. Face it, you're pale.

Thanks, oh 'Lord-of-the-pretentious-whom-deigns-to-grace-us-with-his-presence.'

"It is always wise, as it is also fair, to test a man by the standards of his own day, and not by those of another."

-- Odell Shepard

"The nice thing about standards is that there are so many of them to choose from."

-- Andres S. Tannenbaum

[yeah, so I edited it. What are you lookin' at?]

[ August 01, 2002, 11:09 AM: Message edited by: Leeo ]

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Originally posted by R_Leete:

Snippit of an email from Boo Radley, concerning "Crodaburg":

DAMMIT! DAMMIT! DAMMIT! DAMMIT! DAMMIT!

I did not tell that Jumbo to advance! I did not tell it to move anywhere.

Stupid, stupid, stupid Crapburg scenario.

Don't you just love getting turns like this?

This game is coming down to the last surviving units on both sides. Neither of us will finish with more than a dozen men left. Vehicles were a rare comodity a long time ago. Artillery has left the town standing, but just barely. The streets are so cratered, that the men must walk single file. Which isn't a problem, as most squads only consist of a single man. Now, if one was to contemplate using crews in a mad rush, things could get mighty interesting...

Quoting e-mails out of school...or somefink, eh? OK, Mr. I.R.Late, And The Rabbit Died, no more Mr. Nice-Boo! I'm planning on landing on your blancmange shaped head with both feet now! There shall be the weeping and gnashing of teeth in Rochester now (nothing new there)! I intend to steal your women and drink your beer. When alls said and done, you shall be wearing your hinder for a hat.

I know they say "forewarned is four armed", but I'm not afraid of a polydactyl git like you.

Ready or not, here I come.

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Originally posted by Leeo:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Croda:

A title good enough to make even me post in what has become a pale reminder of the greateness of the Peng Threads of Old.

Aren't you just the mewling twit of condescension? Mister Hand-Wringing "Dear me, Oh my, what has become of my former stomping grounds? You fellows just aren't up to snuff anymore. I could try to improve things by spewing some bile, but I've been up to my armpits in the effluence of newborns and can't be bothered to do more than occasionally show up and castigate you for your failure to meet my expectations."

Why don't you get a radio talk show so you can bitch and complain about the state of the union instead of rolling up your sleeves and doing something about it, Hmm? While you're at it, perhaps you can start bitching about the way the cover art on CMBB isn't up to snuff?

</font>

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Shaddap, _serf_, *boot*.You're not a Squire until approved by the Justicar, and I doubt you'll pass his mustard.
{sigh} ... what to do, what to do! The normal course of events would dictate that the serf Doug Beman (spelt but not bolded) remain a Serf with first rights of refusal going to MrSpkr. He would remain a Serf until such time as he was judged worthy of promotion to Squire ... mostly by me.

Now NORMALLY, having seen ZERO cash from either Doug Beman (spelt but not bolded) or MrSpkr, the servitude would last an indeterminate amount of time ... i.e. until they finally tumbled to the fact that CASH would be required.

In this case, however, I find CMPlayer to be even more obnoxious than usual and would point out to him that it's Muster, not Mustard and that, once again, he's proven himself to be a flaming idiot.

That being the case I choose to show him the error of his ways by allowing the promotion of Doug Beman (spelt but not bolded) to the rank of Squire of the CessPool and place him in the tender care and questionable mercies of MrSpkr ... subject, of course, to any objection from one or another of the Olde Ones for whom I'm serving in this capacity.

Therefore, Olde Ones unless objection is heard, let Doug Beman be added to the ranks of Squires of the CessPool.

Joe

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Joe --

I presume the usual (a plain envelope containing unmarked, nonsequential bills in a variety of smaller denominations) will suffice?

Oh yes - I truly wish you hadn't pointed out CMPlayer's condiment error -- it amuses me to think of him going through life talking about someone "passing the mustard". So innocent, so sincere, so, so, dim.

Steve

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AAAAUUUUUUUGGGGGHHHHHAAAAAA!!!!

Gamey Updates:

LeeO and I are finishing flailing around in the dark over the bad section of town. I'm currently dropping large booming things just because I like to, and the fact that he has troops there is a complete and utter coincident. After we're done the town will look like a hotel after a Navy tailhook party. He'll win, but only because he happens to hold more flags.

Sir Speedy and I have reengaged after his last rousing defeat. To counter my obviously greater tactical ability he chooses a large map with a lot of fog. Then when I don't blindly rush into his trap he has the nerve to ask if I actually have any troops. I don't, but I'm really enjoying frustrating him. Gnashing of teeth is continuing.

The great and mighty Joe Shaw and I have resumed his beating. After blowing him off for over a month we are actually sending turns somewhat frequently. He's dying, I'm not, Situation normal.

The forces of scaliness are in full flight. The only thing that is going to save him is that this battle of the operation is done. I've enjoyed destroying a platoon, 2 schreks, a IG gun and an partridge in a pear tree.

I'd like to tell you how my year long battle with Steve the Rat is going, but he won't return the file the gamey bastige.

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Originally posted by Joe Shaw:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Shaddap, _serf_, *boot*.You're not a Squire until approved by the Justicar, and I doubt you'll pass his mustard.

{sigh} ... what to do, what to do! The normal course of events would dictate that the serf Doug Beman (spelt but not bolded) remain a Serf with first rights of refusal going to MrSpkr. He would remain a Serf until such time as he was judged worthy of promotion to Squire ... mostly by me.

Now NORMALLY, having seen ZERO cash from either Doug Beman (spelt but not bolded) or MrSpkr, the servitude would last an indeterminate amount of time ... i.e. until they finally tumbled to the fact that CASH would be required.

In this case, however, I find CMPlayer to be even more obnoxious than usual and would point out to him that it's Muster, not Mustard and that, once again, he's proven himself to be a flaming idiot.

That being the case I choose to show him the error of his ways by allowing the promotion of Doug Beman (spelt but not bolded) to the rank of Squire of the CessPool and place him in the tender care and questionable mercies of MrSpkr ... subject, of course, to any objection from one or another of the Olde Ones for whom I'm serving in this capacity.

Therefore, Olde Ones unless objection is heard, let Doug Beman be added to the ranks of Squires of the CessPool.

Joe</font>

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Originally posted by Leeo:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Croda:

A title good enough to make even me post in what has become a pale reminder of the greateness of the Peng Threads of Old.

Aren't you just the mewling twit of condescension? Mister Hand-Wringing "Dear me, Oh my, what has become of my former stomping grounds? You fellows just aren't up to snuff anymore. I could try to improve things by spewing some bile, but I've been up to my armpits in the effluence of newborns and can't be bothered to do more than occasionally show up and castigate you for your failure to meet my expectations."

Why don't you get a radio talk show so you can bitch and complain about the state of the union instead of rolling up your sleeves and doing something about it, Hmm? While you're at it, perhaps you can start bitching about the way the cover art on CMBB isn't up to snuff?

I'll give you a pale imitation. You are a pale imitation of someone who participates. You are a pale imitation of conscious thought. You are a pale imitation of a sea sponge. Face it, you're pale.

Thanks, oh 'Lord-of-the-pretentious-whom-deigns-to-grace-us-with-his-presence.'

"It is always wise, as it is also fair, to test a man by the standards of his own day, and not by those of another."

-- Odell Shepard

"The nice thing about standards is that there are so many of them to choose from."

-- Andres S. Tannenbaum

[yeah, so I edited it. What are you lookin' at?]</font>
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Originally posted by Doug Beman:

Permission to continue whomping up on such lowlies as Mike, athkattle, and the like?

Ya' canna continue what ya' never started!!

The j in your initials must stand for ijiot - a nice little circular proof if ever there was one!

[ August 01, 2002, 05:38 PM: Message edited by: Mike ]

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Originally posted by MrSpkr:

Joe --

I presume the usual (a plain envelope containing unmarked, nonsequential bills in a variety of smaller denominations) will suffice?

Oh yes - I truly wish you hadn't pointed out CMPlayer's condiment error -- it amuses me to think of him going through life talking about someone "passing the mustard". So innocent, so sincere, so, so, dim.

Steve

Perhaps that explains why he walks funny; if I ever passed mustard, I'd probably walk funny too...

DjB

[ August 01, 2002, 06:12 PM: Message edited by: Doug Beman ]

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