Peng west of the Pecos: The Challenge goes to Texas

[The_Capt]

Dear Peng,

Some people find simultaneous loss of bladder and rectal control unattractive.

I think they judge too harshly and should keep an open mind. The beauty of catastrophic waste expulsion is really something to behold..even during a dinner.

But I guess some woman are just plain fussy.

My pet monkey is still missing. Fluffy was pretty upset when I fed PIPPU to the dog, he always got such a look of joy when I stuck my hand in that sock. But when I had had enough of PIPPUs power mongering and cast him into the back yard..well Fluffy really never recovered.

My observation of the day is that people seem to be less nice the longer they know you.

If you meet someone face to face in an elevator and say you were to suffer from a case of severe flatulence. I don't mean a quick little "toot" but an explosive off-gas of Old Testament proportion..if Lucifer were to belch after The Dinner of 1000 Souls it would sound like this.

Now say an attractive young woman, one you did not know, were to be standing in the same elevator. Well I can tell you, her face may turn red and she would probably cough a bit but nary a nasty word would be said. Just uncomfortable silence and a hasty exit.

Now if that young lady were your wife or sister..well I can tell you, you be hearing about "eating onions for dinner" all the way home and probably next Easter too.

Now what is really unfair is the fact that you know that you have no chance of sexual congress (the end aim of every male on the planet) with that unknown young lady. Your chances with your wife and sister are much better....not great but better (particularly if you hail from Kentucky).

This is so unfair..the nice girl is just out of reach but the "bird in the hand" will do nothing but nag..nag..nag.

Now here is the kicker. Let's say by some freak that your explosive cloud of "green eggs and ham" sparks up a conversation and by some act of God a romance. Well you can sure bet next time you serve methane gas as an after dinner mint SHE is now going to be on your case too.

Sigh..I just don't get it but thanks for listening. Like the toilet, I sometimes think you are my only friend.

[ May 15, 2002, 02:37 PM: Message edited by: The_Capt ]

[The_Capt]

Dear Peng,

Some people find simultaneous loss of bladder and rectal control unattractive.

I think they judge too harshly and should keep an open mind. The beauty of catastrophic waste expulsion is really something to behold..even during a dinner.

But I guess some woman are just plain fussy.

My pet monkey is still missing. Fluffy was pretty upset when I fed PIPPU to the dog, he always got such a look of joy when I stuck my hand in that sock. But when I had had enough of PIPPUs power mongering and cast him into the back yard..well Fluffy really never recovered.

My observation of the day is that people seem to be less nice the longer they know you.

If you meet someone face to face in an elevator and say you were to suffer from a case of severe flatulence. I don't mean a quick little "toot" but an explosive off-gas of Old Testament proportion..if Lucifer were to belch after The Dinner of 1000 Souls it would sound like this.

Now say an attractive young woman, one you did not know, were to be standing in the same elevator. Well I can tell you, her face may turn red and she would probably cough a bit but nary a nasty word would be said. Just uncomfortable silence and a hasty exit.

Now if that young lady were your wife or sister..well I can tell you, you be hearing about "eating onions for dinner" all the way home and probably next Easter too.

Now what is really unfair is the fact that you know that you have no chance of sexual congress (the end aim of every male on the planet) with that unknown young lady. Your chances with your wife and sister are much better....not great but better (particularly if you hail from Kentucky).

This is so unfair..the nice girl is just out of reach but the "bird in the hand" will do nothing but nag..nag..nag.

Now here is the kicker. Let's say by some freak that your explosive cloud of "green eggs and ham" sparks up a conversation and by some act of God a romance. Well you can sure bet next time you serve methane gas as an after dinner mint SHE is now going to be on your case too.

Sigh..I just don't get it but thanks for listening. Like the toilet, I sometimes think you are my only friend.

[ May 15, 2002, 02:37 PM: Message edited by: The_Capt ]

[Berlichtingen]

Originally posted by bauhaus:

It's no wonder I don't frequent here much anymore. Talk about knee deep in complete and utter tripe. Who are half these people? To all these useless noobs, you know who you are: I shake my thingy in your general direction.

Now sod the feck off and leave us be.

Zip it Bauhaus

No!

Man, that looks like that hurt. You were supposed to put the thingy away first

[Berlichtingen]

Originally posted by bauhaus:

It's no wonder I don't frequent here much anymore. Talk about knee deep in complete and utter tripe. Who are half these people? To all these useless noobs, you know who you are: I shake my thingy in your general direction.

Now sod the feck off and leave us be.

Zip it Bauhaus

No!

Man, that looks like that hurt. You were supposed to put the thingy away first

[Guest PondScum]

Originally posted by The_Capt:

[Ramblings] PIPPU [Ramblings

Pippu? PIPPU? Sweet baby jesus, now I know where mon petite liege Dalem got his evil ideas from for my Francophone "challenge". I blame you. YOU. Oh yes, House Persiflage will be inflicting much pain on you. If you don't fall to the tide of SSNs first, that is.

[Guest PondScum]

Originally posted by The_Capt:

[Ramblings] PIPPU [Ramblings

Pippu? PIPPU? Sweet baby jesus, now I know where mon petite liege Dalem got his evil ideas from for my Francophone "challenge". I blame you. YOU. Oh yes, House Persiflage will be inflicting much pain on you. If you don't fall to the tide of SSNs first, that is.

[Lars]

Coming soon to a Cesspool near You!!!

MrSpkr’s head on a Pike!!!

Get yours now before the dogs have at It!!!

Limited time Offer!!!

{no warrenty expressed or implied, cash sales only, all sales final, this offer not valid anywhere grogs are present}

[Lars]

Coming soon to a Cesspool near You!!!

MrSpkr’s head on a Pike!!!

Get yours now before the dogs have at It!!!

Limited time Offer!!!

{no warrenty expressed or implied, cash sales only, all sales final, this offer not valid anywhere grogs are present}

[Boo Radley]

Originally posted by The_Capt:

Like the toilet, I sometimes think you are my only friend.

Don't flatter yourself. Even the toilet thinks you're a bigger drain than he is.

And by the way, who is this nimrod? Eggnoggathon's slightly less coherent sibling? Were they separated at birth? Are they siamese twins joined at the floor?

[Boo Radley]

Originally posted by The_Capt:

Like the toilet, I sometimes think you are my only friend.

Don't flatter yourself. Even the toilet thinks you're a bigger drain than he is.

And by the way, who is this nimrod? Eggnoggathon's slightly less coherent sibling? Were they separated at birth? Are they siamese twins joined at the floor?

[Seanachai]

Originally posted by flamingknives:

Seanachai, I think that your prejudice blinds you.

I for one was having an interesting time participating in both mentioned threads, around the sides of the vitriol hurled about and in the general direction of Slapdragon.

As a relative newcomer I was unable to participate in the original "Bren Tripod" thread. In any case I was off on a related tangent.

In both occurances, all of a sudden, you and a number of cronies appear and attempt to make the thread over in your own image.

One p.e.n.g. thread is enought, thanks.

And as for the idea that a thread can only be relavent if it achieves such status in your eyes is somewhat laughable. If the people discussing the thread think it's important then it is, and what right have you to hijack it?

If you want a trial, do it, don't suggest it and then bugger off and leave your mess behind.

Actually, the concept that a thread can only be relevant if it achieves such status in my eyes is completely laughable.

However, the original 'Bren Tripod' thread was still there for anyone to read who had any interest in the already done to death topic. The 'Redux' thread started over the exact same ground with very little new or of interest, and even more quickly deteriorated into the usual clash of personalities.

As for 'cronies'; you surely can't seriously entertain the idea that I somehow control and direct these people, can you? In that thread, I only began satirizing the 'personality' clash and the inanity of the topic after several grogs and others who've nothing to do with either myself, nor the Peng Challenge Thread, had already begun the same. As for 'my own image', well, both those threads were already being worked over into the image that we've seen again and again, lately, which was niggling catfights on unsupported details, and personality conflicts (the same thing that killed the first 'Bren Tripod' thread, for that matter).

The 'flipping tanks' thread was mildly more interesting, and was actually going somewhere. Until, of couse, the usual round of 'Hunt the Slapdragon' began. I again pointed that out, mocked it (and, admittedly, the topic, but it was a silly topic, although not one that should come to an end for all that), and, if you recall, posted that 'our work here is done, let's ride!'.

Of course one Peng Challenge Thread is enough (oh, and 'Peng' isn't some sort of acronym, lad). Of course, it wasn't like that in the old days. Talk to some of the really early Board members, such as Berli from here, and they'll tell you that threads often wound out into bursts of silliness and off-topic satire, and just as often headed back on topic.

Now, I may be a short man, but I don't think I'm small-minded, so I'm more than willing to offer you a heart-felt apology if you think that my 'participation' in those threads corrupted and destroyed your enjoyment of them.

But, in my own defense, I actually did leave the 'Tank Flipping' thread to take it's own course after mocking the usual personality clash, and I still maintain that putting a bullet into the head of the sodding 'Bren Tripod Redux' thread was not only humane, but an act that should be applauded by all right thinking folk.

But I think Berli and Dalem might be right about this Flamingknives fellow. He stands up on his hind-legs and speaks out, he does, indeed, seem to hate me (making him a natural for House Berlichtigen, certainly), and he sticks to the point. If you can get him to add some humour to the mix, he might indeed work out.

Now, I've got to get back to the Trial of Slapdragon thing, which is going nowheres.

When the hell does Joe get back? He's quite right, if anyone should prosecute Slappy it's the Justicar.

And bailiffs. We're going to need lots and lots of bailiffs, to heave the witnesses out the door after they've defam...er, 'testified'.

Boo Radley's freakishly large and thuggish looking, isn't he? Maybe we could start with him?

Noba's already lined up for the defense, the Olde Ones shall sit in judgement...what does that remind me of? Oh, yes, we need a Grog judge! Bloody hell, why not Heidman? I mean, he doesn't like Slapdragon, but he's fair minded towards him.

Not to mention it tickles me to have Jeff have to post in here again. You don't see him in the Peng Challenge Thread much!

[Seanachai]

Originally posted by flamingknives:

Seanachai, I think that your prejudice blinds you.

I for one was having an interesting time participating in both mentioned threads, around the sides of the vitriol hurled about and in the general direction of Slapdragon.

As a relative newcomer I was unable to participate in the original "Bren Tripod" thread. In any case I was off on a related tangent.

In both occurances, all of a sudden, you and a number of cronies appear and attempt to make the thread over in your own image.

One p.e.n.g. thread is enought, thanks.

And as for the idea that a thread can only be relavent if it achieves such status in your eyes is somewhat laughable. If the people discussing the thread think it's important then it is, and what right have you to hijack it?

If you want a trial, do it, don't suggest it and then bugger off and leave your mess behind.

Actually, the concept that a thread can only be relevant if it achieves such status in my eyes is completely laughable.

However, the original 'Bren Tripod' thread was still there for anyone to read who had any interest in the already done to death topic. The 'Redux' thread started over the exact same ground with very little new or of interest, and even more quickly deteriorated into the usual clash of personalities.

As for 'cronies'; you surely can't seriously entertain the idea that I somehow control and direct these people, can you? In that thread, I only began satirizing the 'personality' clash and the inanity of the topic after several grogs and others who've nothing to do with either myself, nor the Peng Challenge Thread, had already begun the same. As for 'my own image', well, both those threads were already being worked over into the image that we've seen again and again, lately, which was niggling catfights on unsupported details, and personality conflicts (the same thing that killed the first 'Bren Tripod' thread, for that matter).

The 'flipping tanks' thread was mildly more interesting, and was actually going somewhere. Until, of couse, the usual round of 'Hunt the Slapdragon' began. I again pointed that out, mocked it (and, admittedly, the topic, but it was a silly topic, although not one that should come to an end for all that), and, if you recall, posted that 'our work here is done, let's ride!'.

Of course one Peng Challenge Thread is enough (oh, and 'Peng' isn't some sort of acronym, lad). Of course, it wasn't like that in the old days. Talk to some of the really early Board members, such as Berli from here, and they'll tell you that threads often wound out into bursts of silliness and off-topic satire, and just as often headed back on topic.

Now, I may be a short man, but I don't think I'm small-minded, so I'm more than willing to offer you a heart-felt apology if you think that my 'participation' in those threads corrupted and destroyed your enjoyment of them.

But, in my own defense, I actually did leave the 'Tank Flipping' thread to take it's own course after mocking the usual personality clash, and I still maintain that putting a bullet into the head of the sodding 'Bren Tripod Redux' thread was not only humane, but an act that should be applauded by all right thinking folk.

But I think Berli and Dalem might be right about this Flamingknives fellow. He stands up on his hind-legs and speaks out, he does, indeed, seem to hate me (making him a natural for House Berlichtigen, certainly), and he sticks to the point. If you can get him to add some humour to the mix, he might indeed work out.

Now, I've got to get back to the Trial of Slapdragon thing, which is going nowheres.

When the hell does Joe get back? He's quite right, if anyone should prosecute Slappy it's the Justicar.

And bailiffs. We're going to need lots and lots of bailiffs, to heave the witnesses out the door after they've defam...er, 'testified'.

Boo Radley's freakishly large and thuggish looking, isn't he? Maybe we could start with him?

Noba's already lined up for the defense, the Olde Ones shall sit in judgement...what does that remind me of? Oh, yes, we need a Grog judge! Bloody hell, why not Heidman? I mean, he doesn't like Slapdragon, but he's fair minded towards him.

Not to mention it tickles me to have Jeff have to post in here again. You don't see him in the Peng Challenge Thread much!