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Time to Lock the Forum and Concentrate on Peng Thread


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Guest Wildman

So now I'm to dance for your amusement like Demi Moore sliding down a pole with thigh-high leather boots on. Hey, I like the Demi Moore picture, but I find the Boots a little chaffing.

While I have no problem stuffing the Rat down the nearest hole and dumping and blowing up 500lbs of Ammonium Nitrate on his pointy head. I'm sure as hell not going to do it because some ASS with his head so far up a polar bear decides that he is the be-all, end-all of the Cess.

Now the dancing and playing of newbie, I'm sure brings some sick, perverted pleasure to those whose wrinkled flesh has been soaking in the Cess for thousands of posts. I mean your here aren't you, so such illicit, disgusting, and dare I say, Naughty escapades are to be expected.

<-smacks Meeks with a large cricket bat>

I'll not submit to your disgusting, pathetic attempt to start a show were you can sit back and pull your pud and moan like a 12yr old who just discovered what that fleshy appendage is for. However, for the entertainment of the Pool-at-Large, (and because I'm obviously sick too), let the beating and humping of StevetheRat begin.

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Guest Wildman

My disgust and hatred of Meeks was so great that the server spilled it into two posts.

So carry on, nothing to see here.

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[This message has been edited by Wildman (edited 01-12-2001).]

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Golem:

Pawbroon sucks my ass

Pseudointellectual

Cesspool oldtimer

So bite me.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Dang!

It's creative of you.

And that BITE ME proposal his so decadent.

So European...

As I said to Stench's wife while I was boinking her, Being French is a public service.

Now I'd rather kick you in some undignified parts but there's so many of them I'm quite stuck.

------------------

You are not Obsessive-CMpulsive, you are Allied-Retentive.

Mark IV

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Wildman:

...where you can sit back and pull your pud and moan like a 12yr old who just discovered what that fleshy appendage is for.....let the beating and humping .....

---<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Scab! Scab! Wait until the union hears about that!

That's my job, that is! mad.gif

Mace

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Guest Wildman

Sick, sick man. Know I know your one of those people who make the bottom of the peep show booth stick for Marlow.

Shame, SHAME!!!

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by dalem:

Not exactly a sonnet, but he's of low-enough character that a limerick is just his speed.

Thank you. I hope that hurt you all as much as it hurt me.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I'm sorry, Dalem, but like Hiram, we will have to add you to the list of people that are not permitted to versify within the 'Pool. Refrain. Do not post any other attempts at poetry, for any reason. English can be quite a lovely and poetic language in the proper hands, but even if we dip your hands in lye for several weeks, they will not come clean enough to work in verse. If you're nice about this, we'll get your dogs ears back from Croda and help you staple them back on.

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Tremble, tyrants and you perfidious opprobrium of all the parties,

Tremblez! your parricidal projects finally will receive their prices!

But these sanguinary despots, But these accomplices of Berli,

All these tigers which, without pity, Bauhaus the centre of their mother!

We will enter the career When our elder is not there any more,

We will find there their dust And the trace of their virtues

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****A PUBLIC SERVICE NOTICE****

*AHEM*

Lorak: enter this one if you please

Mace: Allied Major Victory

Stuka: Now truamatised and reduced to bed wetting

Score

Mace: Yanks

80 casualties/25 kia

1 mortar destroyed

points 76

Stuka: Krauts

162 casualties/33 kia/4 captured

1 mortar destroyed

2 guns destroyed

self esteem destroyed

points 24

and now for some much deserved personal gloating --->

Stuka: I would rather the Mask of Shame or the bees than the drumming I just gave you! biggrin.gif

Mace

[This message has been edited by Mace (edited 01-12-2001).]

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by PawBroon:

Dang!

It's creative of you.

And that BITE ME proposal his so decadent.

So European...

As I said to Stench's wife while I was boinking her, Being French is a public service.

Now I'd rather kick you in some undignified parts but there's so many of them I'm quite stuck.

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Oh that's right, you're one of the French ones. You know, I was in France last fall, and I remember having a good time. I guess you must not have been close by. Unless you were the guy who left the Home Pregnancy Test in my hotel room bathroom. Can't thank you enough for that. Relax, by the way, it was negative.

The only parts of me that are undignified are the ones I use to interact with the spotty likes of you; specifically, my ossified toejam residue, with which I hesitantly peck at the keyboard when I'm addressing Frenchmen. (For Aussies I use frozen smegcicles - I respect them a little more.)

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Seanachai:

I'm sorry, Dalem, but like Hiram, we will have to add you to the list of people that are not permitted to versify within the 'Pool. Refrain. Do not post any other attempts at poetry, for any reason<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Hey, Sunshine, the only poetry of mine you're qualified to critique is the kind I just made in my throne room - the kind of "I had too much Kentucky Fried Chicken for lunch" poetry that assaults so many of your senses that you wish the Colonel himself had never been born.

But since you foolishly admit that my verse is to you what the red sun of Krypton is to Superboy, I will continue.

Ahem.

There once was a boy called Sunshine

Guys at the bar thought he was just fine

Bad poetry

Made him weak in the knee

But his favorite movie's Enemy Mine

Thank you, thank you!

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Seanachai:

If you're nice about this, we'll get your dogs ears back from Croda and help you staple them back on.

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I doubt Croda the Amazing Dog Eared Boy is going to part with them. He has become quite attached to them, since I have removed his own ears.

WildMary,

Since StevetheRatTurd has not responded in a timely manner, the battle will be winging its way to you this evening. I'll leave it to you to work out the details with your less than esteemed opponent. That said, there are certain rules of engagement for your little tete-a-tete:

1. Updates are to be posted regularly to the 'Pool by both parties. Make it funny, insulting, etc … or else we send Croda after your pets.

2. No pooftas

3. The loser of the battle will use a signature that is selected by a committee of three pool regulars (Squires or Kaniggets) until he defeats one of the same.

4. There is no rule 4.

Anyone else have conditions to add?

------------------

This message brought to you by

Marlow's Salvage and Wrecking Service,

Proud Sponsor of The Cesspool

formerly The 'Meeks currently exists as Polar Bear excrement' Memorial Thread

[This message has been edited by Marlow (edited 01-12-2001).]

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stevetherat wrote:

> My pet has just had a bout of the squirts. [...] Mind you, he has been eating his deposits lately.

Can someone please remind me what pets are for? Mess-cleaning training for having children? Discussion topic for people fascinated by bodily functions and embarrassing ailments? Memory aid so that you'll know if you've done your yoga because you'll be covered in shedded hair? Channel for surplus cash which pet food manufacturers and veterinarians can surely make better use of?

Geez, if you wanted a small furry animal to molest you could just buy a stuffed one – far cheaper and cleaner, and the cops don't show up if you get carried away.

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1) My troops ran out of the building as it was being damaged and got slaughtered! I'm angry!

2) Hey! My troops stayed in the building as it got damaged and got slaughtered! I'm angry!

– Mr. Clark

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Mace:

oh, and my haiku, just to show I can be as cultured as the next drongo:

German's charging

Stoic Yanks

'With regrets' letters to Mutter

Mace<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

That is most definitely not a haiku.

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All right, you huddled masses and wretched refuse. Matches against Bastables & JD are gearing up. Topplements to follow. Herr Oberst and I will never finish ours unless he can up the file returns to more than one every two weeks. A month into our game and I'm ready to view the first movie...

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\\''||''//

( .) ( .)

-----ooOOo---( )---oOOoo-----

Kilroy was here

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by stevetherat:

Talking about his pet's ****. Seriously, folks, that's what this guy considers worth posting to the pool.

Mind you, he has been eating his deposits lately. Get used to a higher octave.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Higher octave? Octave??? Sweet sister Mary, you don't have two IQ points to rub together, do you? Do you seriously think that a dog or cat or marmot or whatever creature you possess, is going to sing any better because it eats its own ****? What is wrong with you, man? What two-bit sanitarium did they loose you from? And yes, I mean loose, not lose, for no one would miss such a pathetic specimen of craposity as yourself. No doubt some twisted, mad scientist created you from all the worst parts of Marky Mark, Vanilla Ice and Pee-Wee Herman. Once again, I need to now read passages from Thucydides so as to remove the numbness caused to my brain after reading your post. You are a stupid man, not fit to be made into dog food.

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The Thin Red Line doesn't deserve to lick the sweat from my balls let alone demand the cash I would lay down for the DVD version. Seesh. The movie was lame-o! With a capital Hiram.

-Shandorf

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Wankers.

------------------

What do we do with a terrible liar? Well, Great liars we send into the clergy.

Good liars we groom for politics. Moderate liars we supply with sherrif's badges

and guns, and the bad liars, well, we make them heroin whores. So what the hell

do we do with the Terrible Liars? Well, it seems we turn them into physicists

called "chrisl." Peng

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There once was a Peng from Nantucket,

Who had a Thread so long he could suck it,

His Inner Croda roared,

His Lower Senachi chored,

And many Peng Thread Readers said "**** it".

Now THAT is poetry. Leave it to a Business Major to put simplicity back into the whole damned thing.

Haiku's?? Bah, that is for just the really dumb cesspoolers. All cool cesspooler's can make their poems rhyme, like me. Besides, limerick's are way cooler and easier.

GI Tom

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To a New Yorker like you, a hero is some type of weird sandwich.

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More adventures in literacy with GITommy. Oh, boy.

Define "chored".

Limericks are supposed to scan. If you can't write a proper limerick, you probably can't dance, ride a bike, or remove earwax successfully, either.

"Limerick's" with an apostrophe before the "s" indicates possession, not plurality.

Your poetic license is hereby revoked.

Now since you're a business major, communications skills will be of no real use to you in life anyway, especially with your ears full of earwax, so feel free to ignore this. The fact that you continue to post here shows that your parents are too drunk to place the trigger safety lock on the old keyboard. Again. This is a golden opportunity for a semi-literate marketeer to launch an MLM scheme from their 'puter before they wake up, and the time you spend here is time and money wasting, lad.

I should apologize now for our previous episode with relative pronouns, as it was clearly a case of casting pearls before swine, though having annoyed Geier certainly justifies the effort expended.

Perhaps follow the example of Elvis, and eke out a mere pair of spiteful syllables per iteration of the Peng Thread, to keep your hat in the old ring without your rather substantial risk of embarassment.

Later dewd.

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Mark IV:

More adventures in literacy with GITommy. Oh, boy.

Define "chored".

Limericks are supposed to scan. If you can't write a proper limerick, you probably can't dance, ride a bike, or remove earwax successfully, either.

"Limerick's" with an apostrophe before the "s" indicates possession, not plurality.

Your poetic license is hereby revoked.

Now since you're a business major, communications skills will be of no real use to you in life anyway, especially with your ears full of earwax, so feel free to ignore this. The fact that you continue to post here shows that your parents are too drunk to place the trigger safety lock on the old keyboard. Again. This is a golden opportunity for a semi-literate marketeer to launch an MLM scheme from their 'puter before they wake up, and the time you spend here is time and money wasting, lad.

I should apologize now for our previous episode with relative pronouns, as it was clearly a case of casting pearls before swine, though having annoyed Geier certainly justifies the effort expended.

Perhaps follow the example of Elvis, and eke out a mere pair of spiteful syllables per iteration of the Peng Thread, to keep your hat in the old ring without your rather substantial risk of embarassment.

Later dewd.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

MarkyMark, when oh when will you come to realize I have no shame? As early as Cesspool 1 I thought I made it quite clear. I am the minority, uneducated, lowerclass poster. I bring a balance to this thread. If all of you uppity, learned folks were only here, and I wasn't, who would you correct? Each other? I think not kind sir.

My post was nothing short of pure, poetic justice, and you know it.

And it's K33L Dewd to you mister.

GI Tom

------------------

To a New Yorker like you, a hero is some type of weird sandwich.

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