Why can't someone real start the Peng Challenge Thread?

[Iskander]

The FBI says to expect attacks over the next few days...

The wife sends me out after bottled water...

I get that...

...And FOUR CASES OF BEER AND 24 BOTTLES OF WINE. Bring it on, Oh-Bee!

[edited to mention the over fifty bottles of booze behind my bar and in storage; "... and I did the apocalypse, MY WAAAAY!]

[ 10-11-2001: Message edited by: Iskander ]

[Stalin's Organ]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Mace:

That's you've, level and incompetence.

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Be nice to me - If it wasn't for me you'd have nothing useful to contribute.....come to think of it you have nothing useful to contribute anyway - so SOD OFF

[Lars]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Iskander:

...And FOUR CASES OF BEER AND 24 BOTTLES OF WINE. Bring it on, Oh-Bee!

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Way to go Iskander, we knew we could count on you.

That'll show him to mess with the Cess.

[MrPeng]

A pool wrought from the brow of PawBroon augurs well for the old ones.

The moon is passing out of Libra and the chicken livers I saw in a pureed heap at the kosher deli also portend that there can only be good things coming the way of PENG.

Either that or I'll have a horrible fight with the wife and end up on the couch for a week again.

Who cares? It's not like there is anyone who wants to tcp right now...dammit

Feh

Poot

Gah!

Peng

[Joe Shaw]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>A pool wrought from the brow of PawBroon augurs well for the old ones. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>I STILL can't believe we're using this crappy thread title. The only thing wrought that I want to see connected with Pawbroon's Brow is WROUGHT IRON! Although the idea of using an auger on it has a certain appeal too.

Joe

[Hanns]

I have returned after facing the most gamey of opponents of excessive overtime and sleep deprivation (and Joe Shaw , sodd off, I'm officially challenging the brazen, self proclaimed nightsoil gathering eta SnapBrasseieren to a game).

Thusly, Sloppygroggin' thou bilious, blathering grognite stand fast afore I am forced to nail your tineal malformed pseudopods to such floor as the 'Cess provides. I will neither throw down my gauntlet for fear of losing it in this murky 'Cess nor strike you with it as it would be akin to gilding the paper upon which one whipes his arse. Your groggy vocal ejaculations fair as poorly as stillborn maggots upon the foul corpse of your bloated intellect. That one such as thee is permitted to pollute and despoil the virgin minds of college plebians is a testament not to the level of which the 'Merican Edumucation system has fallen but the bryozoan lack of spine shown by the bloated and bureaucratically incestuous Teachers Union that plague this country. Instead of tenure I suggest you seek a remittance of manure as it more closely resembles that which you purportedly proffer. When you reply to this missive I enthusiastically suggest you learn to snip your quotes (as surely as your purported wife wishes that you would snip the shriveled fruits of your, ahem manly weed).

Sir Lars I would beseech thee to render or pilfer a suitable match for myself and that bastidge Snapdanglin' so that we may determine how much of a loser Snappy is. Seanachai suggested that I challenge thee, but I fear that I may only rise above my station with a suitable pile of corpses beneath me. I wait with baited uhh... hooks for a set-up with which to crush the blasphemous "ronin" SSN.

Hanns

[Slapdragon]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Hanns:

Thusly, Slapdragon/b] thou bilious, crapola crapola crapola crapola.

Hanns<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Hands, my illiterate friend. I will certianly send you a set up after I crush CM Player, devestate Dorosh, and dump Dalem. Be pantient my young weed and the ortho will come soon enough.

[Joe Shaw]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>and Joe Shaw , sodd off, I'm officially challenging the brazen, self proclaimed nightsoil gathering eta SnapBrasseieren to a game ...<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Ummm, guys, is there some reason I should care whether or not two SSNs play each other? Didn't think so. Knock yourself out Hands ... no ... really ... KNOCK YOURSELF OUT ... and do a good job of it.

Joe

[Iskander]

Prof. Dr. Peng and I had an TCP/IP.

If he values his future goods -- AND HE KNOWS WHAT I MEAN -- he will discuss this properly, if at all.

[Iron Chef Sakai]

what exactly is the "peng challenge"?

[Joe Shaw]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>If he values his future goods -- AND HE KNOWS WHAT I MEAN -- he will discuss this properly, if at all.

--------------------

"Thank the gods, ICKY is back. He is the only one here who makes any sense whatsoever - including me."<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> It seems to me that there are only two options here ... either Iskander edits his post or he changes his sig.

Joe

[Slapdragon]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Iron Chef Sakai:

what exactly is the "peng challenge"?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

The Peng Challenge thread is a bunch of wits (well, that is half right at least) challenging each other to contests by using verbal taunts and politically incorrect diatribe. In about 5 minutes a less polite denizen will crawl from the wood work and tell you to sod off newbie, at which time you need to decide if you can swim with the sharks and be a lower the low SSN, anfd follow a myriad of odd rules.

If you just want to challenge someone without having to spar at the level required here, you can go to Dorosh is God and just challenge one of the resident grogs to a contest. Otherwise remember, minnows make tasty meals for sharks.

[Joe Shaw]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>If you just want to challenge someone without having to spar at the level required here, you can go to Dorosh is God and just challenge one of the resident grogs to a contest. Otherwise remember, minnows make tasty meals for sharks.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> I try very hard to avoid posting TOO much ... it tends to create challenges which I haven't the time to accomodate. BUT:

(rrr) THIS is what comes of having a thread hosted by Pawbroon ... the SSNs obviously think we'll let ANYONE in.

(- {inadvertant smilie deleted with extreme prejudice}) THIS is what happens when idiots like Pawbroon don't post the rules properly and

(quo vadis) DAMNIT SLOPDRAGGIN' (BOLDING edited OUT on account of inadvertant bolding of SSN) YOU CAN'T TROLL FOR ... THAT ... THAT ... OTHER THREAD HERE! My Gawd man you sound like a cheap Tijuana Good Time Girl who needs a couple of bucks for her next tequila. If you're going to be a PIMP ... be a good one, send a private email.

Joe

{edited to remove inadvertances ... deal with it}

[ 10-12-2001: Message edited by: Joe Shaw ]

[Iron Chef Sakai]

interesting....i can't help but assume that i could "swim with the sharks" if there was any around that is. now if you be good little guppies i'll sprinkle some yummy fish food in your tank, hmmm i forgot about the part about half wits, so in english i am confident i can show you guys how to play the game

[MrPeng]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Iron Chef Sakai:

what exactly is the "peng challenge"?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

An excellent question, laddie, and for posting such a fine and noble query you shall have a right and true answer. There are ELEVEN things regarding the Peng Challenge:

B. MY challenge, for I am Peng and It is MY thread, despite what the bilious bag of bad wind PShaw might have you believe, is to not write back to every half witted pile of maggot dung that decides he'll have a little dip in the 'pool.

42. My Challenge is also to refrain from pointing out the complete and utter idiocy of the mooks and twits that come here asking moronic, pathetic, and unworthy questions.

11. Further, fine Chef and bottle washer, my challenge is to ignore the stinking prat of those with less charm and wit than a scorched mirepoix

iv.) Lastly, it is my holy and challenged duty to avoid, under any cricumstance, posting a response to a scum sucking newbie telling him or her to "Die a Lot Now"

I hope this helps to clarify exactly what MY challenge is.

By the way MrIron

SOD OFF.

Peng

[Iron Chef Sakai]

ok i can talk some trash, but i have only played the game 4 times, i played the computer once and played human opponents 3 times, hehe, this is the best game i've ever played i think

[Mace]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Stalin's Organ:

If it wasn't for me you'd have nothing useful to contribute.....come to think of it you have nothing useful to contribute anyway - so SOD OFF<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Now, now!

I've been contributing nothing here longer than you have.

That's why I'm a mighty Kinigget of the MBT, and you're just you.

Mace

[Iron Chef Sakai]

Peng...you may be able to defeat cobra when you play g.i joe by yourself, but this is a more complex game then , er, whatever it is you do with skeletor and castle greyskull, though i'm sure your tactics are solid for hte defense of castle greyskull, i am stil skepticly you could comprehend, much less play a game of this caliber, now i am sure your head must be hurting from reading all these funny words, so go back to your lightbright and try to forget all the big and scary words in this thread

[Slapdragon]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Iron Chef Sakai:

ok i can talk some trash, but i have only played the game 4 times, i played the computer once and played human opponents 3 times, hehe, this is the best game i've ever played i think<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Ok, enough being nice, why don't you challenge that quarter wit Hann and sod off. I would finish him like a plate of cous cous at a lamb eating contest but my tray is a bit full at the second.

[MrPeng]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Iskander:

Prof. Dr. Peng and I had an TCP/IP.

If he values his future goods -- AND HE KNOWS WHAT I MEAN -- he will discuss this properly, if at all.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Icky Icky Icky F-tang

I have NO IDEA what you are TALKING aboot. Did we TCP/IP tonight? How did it go? I must have blacked out from all the whiskey. Ahhh well... Lorak you pin-eared elvish punk-bastard (glad yer back)Swine! Scritch thusly in the TOME:

Peng played ICKY and they ain't sayin how it ended.

See what happens when the two drunkest bastards play this game? No good can come from it.

Peng

[Seanachai]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Iron Chef Sakai:

interesting....i can't help but assume that i could "swim with the sharks" if there was any around that is. now if you be good little guppies i'll sprinkle some yummy fish food in your tank, hmmm i forgot about the part about half wits, so in english i am confident i can show you guys how to play the game<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Oh, gods, that was truly dreadful.

Don't let Snapdragon reply to the tourists anymore, as his non-standard use of English and rather degraded metaphors clearly confuse them, and their translating dictionaries are coming up woefully short when they attempt to reply.

The whole 'fish' exchange was, in a word, pathetic.

[Slapdragon]

I tried my best to dull it down for the nimrod, but was woefully unsucessful and am willing to take a few lashes for it. How was I to know he was a mental defective with a fourth grade vocabulary.

[MrPeng]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Slapdragon:

I tried my best to dull it down for the nimrod, but was woefully unsucessful and am willing to take a few lashes for it. How was I to know he was a mental defective with a fourth grade vocabulary. {EMPHASIS ADDED}<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

You teach college students, don't you?

NOTE: for the humor impaired, the preceding compared college students - whom MrSplattyDragoon is likely to have in his classroom - with a mental defective having the vocabulary of a fourth grader. This is FUNNY. If it were ironic it would be funnier, however, the edumacation system being what it is, well hell, college kids ain't fit fer readin ner ritin no mo. all them peircings and tatoos and stuff...

[old guy mutterings] in my day men only had ONE earing, dammit, and a tatoo that said "MOM" ifn we got one atall...[/old guy mutterings]

Of course ALL BETS ARE OFF if Splatty teaches kindergarten or something.

Christ, I should be in bed by now.

Peng

[Iron Chef Sakai]

if you guys are good, you should check out this web site here, they offer alot of games cmbo included and offer a ranking system, check it out http://www.rugged-defense.nl/

[Joe Shaw]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>if you guys are good, you should check out this web site here, they offer alot of games cmbo included and offer a ranking system, check it out<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Ohmigawd I think I'm gonna be sick. It's pretty obvious that he's NOT going away so forgive me lads but if Pawbroon WON'T do it I guess I must:

The JUSTICAR'S OFFICIAL RULES

(ii) This is now and forever will be (at least until it dies and the next is recreated like a Phoenix risen from the ashes) the PENG CHALLENGE THREAD, the Mutha Beautiful Thread and the CessPool. If you know not of these things you are an interloper and are NOT welcome ... SOD OFF!

(XIV) Were you dropped often as a child? SOD OFF!

(1.43) You are a dispicable and lowly SSN, a Scum Sucking Newbie and you will NOT be welcome here. You will be spat upon and called names ... actually we ALL are spat upon and called names but in YOUR case we'll mean it. If you don't want this to happen to YOU ... SOD OFF!

(ref. e) You may have come here thinking that you are special and unique among SSNs and that you have What It Takes to be one of us ... YOU ARE WRONG SO SOD OFF.

( Haven't you SODDED OFF yet? Please don't hesitate on MY account, there's no time like the present you know. Oh my, persistent little beggar aren't you, don't say I didn't warn you. If you must you must I suppose, but SODDING OFF would be the road less travelled you know. Oh well, look then, please remember that this is the Peng CHALLENGE Thread, so perhaps you might consider actually CHALLENGING someone to a game of CM. IF you do, and please don't overlook the advantages of simply SODDING OFF RIGHT NOW, do remember the following:

{34} NO ... you can't challenge me ... or another Knight, or really even a Squire. You MIGHT be able to challenge a Serf I suppose and we don't care HOW many SSNs you challenge. That would be best, come to think of it, challenge another SSN for our amusement. Post your AARs, we NEED a good laugh. And if you post in the proper CessPool manner you might, MIGHT be proposed as a SERF! The chances are miniscule and vanishingly remote of YOU ever achieving that dizzying height, but it HAS happened. Much as 8th round draft picks DO make it onto NFL teams you MIGHT be made a Serf ... {chortle} ... yeah right. And from the pool of Serfs are chosen ... {reverential pause for the choir to hum} SQUIRES! Yes, some poor (and in YOUR case probably drunk) Knight might chose YOU as his Squire to do ... Squirely things. Once a Squire has completed five CessPool matches ... well, we won't worry about THAT right now, odds are VERY GOOD that you'll be SODDING OFF shortly anyway.

{Uiv} SOUND OFF LIKE YA GOT A PAIR! Mind you it pays to be careful to WHOM you're sounding off! Sounding off to a Knight or Squire is ... not recommended. But you SHOULD sound off to your opponents and to those whom you'd challenge. For it is by your words, see you, that you will be judged. We are looking for MEN of a certain ... STYLE, men of WIT, men of HUMOR ... and women of virtually ANY flavor.

{87/87) Do NOT sound off ABOUT your pair. We tolerate no racial, sexual, political or ethnic crusades ... only good old fashioned PERSONAL attacks.

{IF you decide that you belong here ... and you're wrong, you don't, don't be thinking that you can just drop in from time to time. You must put in your time here, you must work for your stripes and SHOW THAT YOU HONOR the traditions of the CessPool. We're tired of people who wander in and waste our time and then never show up again ... or you could just SOD OFF} 1.

{vii} Have Half A Brain, this will be a stretch for most SSNs but give it a shot. When (or in YOUR case on the rare occassion IF) you taunt someone, make it memorable ... otherwise, HELLO, we won't remember you.

{Don't} think that just because you're good at CM that you have a place HERE! We don't care ... we care about taunting, insulting and generally being Gamey, underhanded swine. That's right ... GAMEY ... we LIKE GAMEY because the Outerboards DON'T.

{([])} One final word of warning, The Justicariate of the Peng Challenge Thread is charged with the awesome responsibility of ensuring that the sacred traditions of the CessPool are not trampled upon ... have a care ... our dungeons are ever waiting.