Joe Shaw Posted August 17, 2001 Share Posted August 17, 2001 ooOOOgah, ooOOOgah, ooOOOgah Be it Know to One and All Sundry that this is The One The True CessPool, The Mutha Beautiful Thread, the PENG CHALLENGE THREAD returned from it's ignominious tenure under the handle of a Squire and back under the control of a True Knight of the CessPool. Harken ye to the RULES: (ii) This is NOT your father's ladder, lad, it's the Peng Challenge Thread and you are NOT worthy and should, frankly, just SOD OFF and be done with it. (XIV) Are you brain dead? SOD OFF! (1.43) There are SIX (6) kinds of people in the world, Old Ones, Seniour Knights, Knights, Squires ... Serfs ... and Scum Sucking Newbies (SSNs). All but the last of these are relatively worthy, (the jury's still out on the Serfs but they ARE recognized) but the last, the SSNs are worthless and to be despised by all right thinking individuals. If you are an SSN ... SOD OFF. (ref. e) You may have come here thinking that you are special and unique among SSNs and that you have What It Takes to be one of us ... YOU ARE WRONG SO SOD OFF. ( If you MUST stick around, and we'd much prefer that you just SOD OFF, remember that this is the Peng CHALLENGE Thread, so perhaps you might consider actually CHALLENGING someone to a game of CM. IF you do, and don't overlook the advantages of simply SODDING OFF, remember the following: {34} Challenge someone of your own stature, which is non-existant, by choosing another SSN, a Serf or perhaps, PERHAPS a squire. How do you find these people you ask ... mostly because you're an idiot ... you find them here: Lorak's CessPool Page {Uiv} SOUND OFF LIKE YA GOT A PAIR! None of this mamby pamby, "Oh please good sir, might I have the honor of participating in a game of CM with you or yours at your earliest convenience?" BAH! This is the place for bile and venom, for taunts and insults and is NOT for children but only for MEN (and a few good WOMEN ... though in my experience BAD WOMEN are to be preferred) of substance, of STYLE, of WIT and HUMOR. {87/87) Do NOT sound off ABOUT your pair. We tolerate no racial, sexual, political or ethnic crusades ... only good old fashioned PERSONAL attacks. {Stick Around Damn It, we're tired of people who wander in and waste our time and then never show up again ... or you could just SOD OFF} 1. {vii} Have Half A Brain, this will be a stretch for most SSNs but give it a shot. {Don't} think that just because you're good at CM that you have a place HERE! We don't care ... we care about taunting, insulting and generally being Gamey, underhanded swine. That's right ... GAMEY ... we LIKE GAMEY because the Outerboards DON'T. NOW ... wouldn't it be easier all around to just SOD OFF? Joe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Madmatt Posted August 17, 2001 Share Posted August 17, 2001 Hmm, Joe seems to certainly like his SOD...Ah well...Enjoy your new home boys, try and remember to scrub the walls when you are through. Madmatt Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted August 17, 2001 Share Posted August 17, 2001 Nice title Joe. Been working on that one for awhile, have you? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFCElvis Posted August 17, 2001 Share Posted August 17, 2001 [serious mode on] Before I get into calling you guys Wankers, it would be swell if all cesspoolers who pray and others who can provide good thoughts would say a payer or have a nice thought for Mike Raber/Hiram/Philly Phans family today because they are going through something pretty heavy. I know my thoughts are with him and hope everything turns out well. [erious mode off[ Wankers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrSpkr Posted August 17, 2001 Share Posted August 17, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Joe Shaw: [QB{Stick Around Damn It, we're tired of people who wander in and waste our time and then never show up again ... or you could just SOD OFF}[/QB]<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> ROIGHT! THAT does it! You actually invited these mongrels to stay?! Prepare your troops, you swine! I shall see you on the field of battle and rip out your still beating heart before the sun sets on the meadow. To arms, you pointy headed, Mormon Wive lusting, pimple faced GIT and SEND ME A SETUP! Seniour Knight and he invites them to stay. Sheesh. [edited to point out to Elvis that (1) I will keep Phillies' in my family's prayers and (76.3) Turn numbering R001z.] [ 08-17-2001: Message edited by: MrSpkr ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Juardis Posted August 17, 2001 Share Posted August 17, 2001 Great, like the new digs, much roomier than the old. Anyway, cmplayer, since you have accepted a challenge already, I'll let you give it your best. As for Triumvir, don't think that just because we left the old haunts that I have forgotten about you. Bring those squirrely assed brit boys across the open fields and meet your maker. That's roight, I have LET you get as far you've gotten. Only because....you have chosen to assault me you gamey bastard yet the only assault there will be will be the putrid odor of dead bits assaulting your nostrils. Fear the Hummels. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted August 17, 2001 Share Posted August 17, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Elvis: [serious mode on] Before I get into calling you guys Wankers, it would be swell if all cesspoolers who pray and others who can provide good thoughts would say a payer or have a nice thought for Mike Raber/Hiram/Philly Phans family today because they are going through something pretty heavy. I know my thoughts are with him and hope everything turns out well. [erious mode off[ Wankers.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Pass on to Hiram that I hope everything turns out all right. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted August 17, 2001 Author Share Posted August 17, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Nice title Joe. Been working on that one for awhile, have you?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> And unto me came a visage of BTS in all it's might and glory and lo he was fearsome in raiments of levis and denim jacket. And upon the jacket was writ in fell runes the words "Hels Angles, OKland" ... apparently spelling wasn't one of the more emphasized area of the cirriculum in OKland. And unto me he doeth saith "To thee shall be given the honor of the next incarnation of the MBT" "But surely others are more worthy of this honor than I, MadMatt?" for indeed it was he. "Nay," sayeth he, "thou shalt create it and it shall be done as it is written for I find it to be cool." "Thy will be done, oh great one," I tremulously agreed, "it shall be as you say." "Damn right." sayeth he to me. And thus was it done. Joe [ 08-17-2001: Message edited by: Joe Shaw ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marlow Posted August 17, 2001 Share Posted August 17, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Elvis: [serious mode on] Before I get into calling you guys Wankers, it would be swell if all cesspoolers who pray and others who can provide good thoughts would say a payer or have a nice thought for Mike Raber/Hiram/Philly Phans family today because they are going through something pretty heavy. I know my thoughts are with him and hope everything turns out well. [erious mode off[ Wankers.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Will do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marlow Posted August 17, 2001 Share Posted August 17, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Joe Shaw: Be it Know to One and All Sundry that this is The One The True CessPool, The Mutha Beautiful Thread, the PENG CHALLENGE THREAD returned from it's ignominious tenure under the handle of a Squire and back under the control of a True Knight of the CessPool.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Even one started by a Knight from Utah is preferable to the last abomination. <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR> (1.43) There are SIX (6) kinds of people in the world, Old Ones, Seniour Knights, Knights, Squires ... Serfs ... and Scum Sucking Newbies (SSNs). All but the last of these are relatively worthy, <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Joe, you once again demonstrate the dangers of trying to think. None of you knobs is worth the spit hanging from the corner of Peng's chin. Certainly not anybody beneath the rank of Knight of the Cesspool. <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR> [Challenge someone of your own stature, which is non-existant, by choosing another SSN, a Serf or perhaps, PERHAPS a squire. How do you find these people you ask ... mostly because you're an idiot ... you find them here: Lorak's CessPool Page<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> You should be shot for giving away MBT State secrets. <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR> {Stick Around Damn It, we're tired of people who wander in and waste our time and then never show up again ... <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Stick Around!?! You idiot. Didn't we just finish sending the Bard off to the gulag for inviting the Boardies in? And now you want them to stay!?! Stoning is too good for you. [ 08-17-2001: Message edited by: Marlow ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Herr Oberst Posted August 17, 2001 Share Posted August 17, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Joe Shaw: "Thy will be done, oh great one," I tremulously agreed, "it shall be as you say." <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Yes, it is a new MBT and here I am, Herr Oberst, to pass judgement. Why you ask? Well, because I feel like it, and it pisses off Joe Shaw, and that amuses me. Now, on to the tirade... Oh wonderful, now we have a self-deluded religious zealot starting the MBT who, no doubt, keeps a few spare Mormon Wives closeted away for acts more barbarous than those that Mace performs with his sheep. But however despicable his nature, undersevedly swollen his head over starting the thread, and generally unlikable I find him (After all, mortgage wankers are only the slightest nick above lawyers on the evolutionary scale. "Hi, I'm Joe Shaw, and I'll be your mortage wanker. Please sign the papers and assume the position...") I do grant that he did a good job on posting the rules, so perhaps a polite little golf clap is due. No, how about we forget the golfing part of it and just give him the clap... Perhaps he and that infamous butt-ler of his can work that arrangement out in private between themselves and not sully the Cesspool any more than it already is. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted August 17, 2001 Author Share Posted August 17, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Stick Around!?! You idiot. Didn't we just finish sending the Bard off to the gulag for inviting the Boardies in? And now you want them to stay!?! Stoning is too good for you.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Well I like that ... I got to ALL the work of putting together a new and improved set of rules and do I get a single word of thanks? I do NOT. Look you to the rules, how many times do I have to say SOD OFF? How many times must I invite them to leave? But we know, oh how well we know from bitter experience, that some small percentage WILL persist. IN THAT CASE I thought it correct to point out that they will be in it for the long haul. We have only to look to the list of Serfs to see a long and indistinguished roster of those who came and DID NOT STICK AROUND. Of course we want them to SOD OFF, and as MadMatt himself pointed out, I repeated it MANY times. But for those who choose to try their luck, be warned, this is not a part time, on again off again commitment, THIS ... IS THE CESSPOOL. As to YOU MrSpkr I spit on your offer to send a setup. I have more important things to do ... trimming toenails comes to mind, if you wish to fight me, then YOU send a setup or, preferably, a scenario reputed to be balanced which HAS NOT BEEN PLAYED BY EITHER OF US ... you see, I know you too well. Joe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
**YK2** Posted August 17, 2001 Share Posted August 17, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Joe Shaw: BAH! This is the place for bile and venom, for taunts and insults and is NOT for children but only for MEN (and a few good WOMEN ... though in my experience BAD WOMEN are to be preferred) <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> You mean there are MEN in here? *Looks around puzzled* Can you point me in the right direction please? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Panzer Leader Posted August 17, 2001 Share Posted August 17, 2001 Oh brother... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrSpkr Posted August 17, 2001 Share Posted August 17, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Joe Shaw: As to YOU MrSpkr I spit on your offer to send a setup. I have more important things to do ... trimming toenails comes to mind, if you wish to fight me, then YOU send a setup or, preferably, a scenario reputed to be balanced which HAS NOT BEEN PLAYED BY EITHER OF US ... you see, I know you too well. Joe<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Berli, do you have anything this bloated meatsack and I can fight through? Medium size, please, not too many tanks - my poor processor is still trying to recover from multiple JABOS! wounds. Oh yes, Herr Oberst, you may give Joe Shaw the clap if you so desire, but I think I can speak for EVERYONE else here in saying, umm, that's okay, not right now, not ever, in fact, thank you very much. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mace Posted August 17, 2001 Share Posted August 17, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Elvis: have a nice thought for Mike Raber/Hiram/Philly Phans family today because they are going through something pretty heavy. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Yep, Mace's philosophy, When life hits rock bottom, it can only improve! Actually, since you know Elvis and Peng on a personal basis, it's probably as bad as it gets. Anyhow, I hope things turn out better for you Mike/Hiram/Phan Mace [ 08-17-2001: Message edited by: Mace ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mace Posted August 17, 2001 Share Posted August 17, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by YK2: You mean there are MEN in here? *Looks around puzzled* Can you point me in the right direction please?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Ok....Time to review that contract with my marketing agency 'cause my 'Mace is a real man' promo obviously isn't giving me the correct exposure. Hmmmm Exposure?!!! I know, perhaps I can strip again? Mace Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
**YK2** Posted August 17, 2001 Share Posted August 17, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Mace: Ok....Time to review that contract with my marketing agency 'cause my 'Mace is a real man' promo obviously isn't giving me the correct exposure. Hmmmm Exposure?!!! I know, perhaps I can strip again? Mace <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Lol... Now this I just gotta see..... *Lights* *Camera* *Action* Ooops....... Slightly under exposed by the look of things. Never mind, Perhaps Black and White will enhance things a little Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted August 17, 2001 Author Share Posted August 17, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>I do grant that he did a good job on posting the rules, so perhaps a polite little golf clap is due. No, how about we forget the golfing part of it and just give him the clap...<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Oh I SAY ... JEEVES, JEEVES I say. Yes Sir, may I assume from your tone that the recent posting by Herr Oberst has caught your attention? Oh ... well, I mean, well yes Jeeves I mean just look at it, it's ... it's ... Quite so Sir, it's hardly up to standard is it Sir. But Jeeves, well dash it all man, we can't just let it GO man, it's just not ... done. Indeed Sir, Herr Oberst does have something of a talent for ... the coarser side of things. But I shouldn't worry if I were you Sir. Not worry Jeeves? How can I not worry when that Hairy Obreast chap is speaking IN PUBLIC of ... of ... of ... well, of THAT. And he MIGHT be back, Jeeves, granted he shows up hardly at all but still ... Yes Sir, the possibility might exist were he not otherwise occupied. Otherwise occupied? Ah ... you've already taken steps then Jeeves? I hope it meets with your approval Sir, but I suspect that Herr Oberst will shortly be occupied in a LENGTHY debate with Username. I would seem Sir, that Herr Oberst has posted a statement that Username doesn't know ... if I may use the words HE apparently used ... his butt from a bulldozer. But why would this Obreast chap do that? Ah Sir, these days, who can say who actually posted something and who didn't. ... Jeeves, I don't pay you enough. I do attempt to give satisfaction Sir. Now Sir, the Puma? Perhaps NOT in middle of the field Sir. Joe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted August 18, 2001 Share Posted August 18, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by MrSpkr: Berli, do you have anything this bloated meatsack and I can fight through? Medium size, please, not too many tanks - my poor processor is still trying to recover from multiple JABOS! wounds.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Have either of you played 'Sollies-Ville'? If not, get it at Der Kessel. Barring that, I would suggest 'Toulon Nightlife'. No time now to create a custom one Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrSpkr Posted August 18, 2001 Share Posted August 18, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Berlichtingen: Have either of you played 'Sollies-Ville'? If not, get it at Der Kessel. Barring that, I would suggest 'Toulon Nightlife'. No time now to create a custom one<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> I haven't played it. How about you, Josef? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted August 18, 2001 Author Share Posted August 18, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>I haven't played it. How about you, Josef?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> What is this, Madame Fife's Friendly Opponent Finder? No I haven't played it and yes I did DL it and yes I'll send the bloody setup ... haven't you ever heard of email ... sheesh. Joe [ 08-17-2001: Message edited by: Joe Shaw ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lorak Posted August 18, 2001 Share Posted August 18, 2001 Greetings muggles, Running short of time here.... so a quick Tome update: JD-win Iskander-loss Stuka-win OGSF-loss Peng-win Elvis-loss Juardis has been made a pissboy/serf. [serious] Elvis, tell Mike my family will keep him in our prayers and wish him and his family well. Also, Has anyone heard from Von Shrad? Or have any news as to how his surgery went?[/serious] Lorak Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted August 18, 2001 Author Share Posted August 18, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>[serious] Elvis, tell Mike my family will keep him in our prayers and wish him and his family well. Also, Has anyone heard from Von Shrad? Or have any news as to how his surgery went?[/serious]<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> [serious] May I add my wishes to Hiram, we miss him and wish him all the best. I haven't heard from Von Shrad, but did receive a very nice email from him just prior to the surgery, let's hope all is well there too. [/serious] Congratulations Jar O' P*ss, now you just have to find some brain dead ... uh I mean, worthy Knight to take you to squire. In other 'pool news, sources close to Sir Joe Shaw have reported that he has completed and sent the setup for the battle between him and Sir MrSpkr. When asked for his comment to this news, Sir MrSpkr appeared distraught and was seen wandering away muttering, "Ohmigawd, what have I done, what have I done, how stupid of me." This reporter couldn't help but agree with his statement. Joe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leeo Posted August 18, 2001 Share Posted August 18, 2001 Send me a turn, you Keynesian proto-planner with a tendency to sibilant, staccato speech! (And you know who you are) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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