Have you no Challenge, Peng? At long last, have you left no Challenge?

[Joe Shaw]

This is the Peng Challenge Thread, which brought you from the Outerboard, and out of the land of Grogs. If thy be of the Peng Challenge Thread thee are welcome here. If thee are NOT ... then BEGONE, for those who reside here recognize these commandments and follow them:

I. Thou shalt have no Threads before this.

II. Thou shalt not have congress with Scum Sucking Newbies (SSN), nor shalt thou bow down before Grogs nor worship them.

III. Thou shalt not take the name or traditions of the Peng Challenge Thread in vain nor shall thee hold anyone guiltless who takes the name or traditions of the Peng Challenge Thread in vain.

IV. Remember the place of the Peng Challenge Thread and keep it upon the first page.

V. Honor the Olde Ones, the Seniour Knights, the Knights and the Squires … ignore the Serfs and vilify the SSNs.

VI. Thou shalt not be here without that thee challenge a person.

VII. Thou shalt not sound off without thy pair.

VIII. Thou shalt not sound off ABOUT thy pair, nor about politics, nor racial, sexual nor ethnic crusades.

IX. Thou SHALT give false testimony about thy fellow CessPoolers, and give them gamey play and insults and bile and taunts.

X. Thou shalt not covet thy fellow CessPoolers record, for wins and losses are not OF the CessPool.

Verily those that walk in the way of the CessPool shall fall in and they SHALL be wet, so if it is thy wish to remain dry ... SOD OFF!

Joe

[Moriarty]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Joe Shaw:

This is the Peng Challenge Thread, which brought you from the Outerboard, and out of the land of Grogs.

et al

Joe<hr></blockquote>

Improper numbering Just-A-Caricature

[Seanachai]

What the heck? We're only at 260 or so, aren't we? I didn't see the Mad One posting that it was time, or did I miss something?

Oh, well, off to drink Newcastle Brown Ale with a young blonde woman.

[Lawyer]

This is a tawdry "jump start" of the Peng thread by a ego-maniac.

Honor thy Consigliori or die!

[Stuka]

"BEEP!!"

False start!

"All runners back to their blocks"

Joe Xia, you have broken the LAW and will be taken from this place, stripped off all rank and thrown to the grogs.

Or at least you should be. Consider yourself lucky, young man.

[Joe Shaw]

All properly blessed and sanctioned lads, you can trust me.

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>"Have you no Challenge, Peng? At long last, have you left no Challenge?"

Run with it, tell me when you have it started.

Matt<hr></blockquote>

A tad premature, perhaps, but consider the hazards of waiting until the last moment.

!) By definition, Joe Shaw hosted M.B.T.s are clearly superior and are therefore to be preferred.

d} We ran the terrible risk of another Australian hosted thread and THAT wouldn't do at all.

87] We ran the even more terrible risk of having the thread hosted by Pawbroon or Elvis again. It is not a ... good thing to have a thread title that makes NO sense.

> I felt it critical to re-establish the rules of the CessPool and who better to do that than ME!

# I chose the numbering since we have to ensure that SSNs aren't even more confused than they normally are.

Joe

{edited to add PROOF POSITIVE of the validity of this thread ... Stuka ... pfffftttttt.

[ 11-07-2001: Message edited by: Joe Shaw ]</p>

[MrPeng]

Well, except for the early start, and the numbering, and the lame psuedo-biblical prose, and the fact that it is yet another autocratic, despotic, facistic, the "man" keepin me down PShaw initiated thread, it seems we would be off to a pretty dreadful start. Thanks Joe!

Peng

edited to write this bit: Oh, OK so the title is anti McCarthy-ite, which is better than being pro-HUAC, so we will only hate PShaw a little less than we already do for such a lame-arsed start to yet another Justicariate thread.

[ 11-07-2001: Message edited by: MrPeng ]</p>

[Leeo]

You all make me hate you. It's not that I want to hate, it is only the fact that you are so deserving of ire that forces me to the road more harsh. That, and the fact that you're a bunch of wussies.

[Leeo]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Stuka:

Don't make me hurt you<hr></blockquote>

I've been hurt by far better than you.

[Berlichtingen]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Joe Shaw:

for those who reside here recognize these commandments and follow them:<hr></blockquote>

Commandments? Feh! Now this is something I must oppose

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>I. Thou shalt have no Threads before this.<hr></blockquote>

Bren Tripods are more interesting than any thread you have started

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>II. Thou shalt not have congress with Scum Sucking Newbies (SSN), nor shalt thou bow down before Grogs nor worship them.<hr></blockquote>

Of the many Char B1 bis captured, the Germans converted 60 of them to Flamethrower tanks. Several of these were used in Arnhem. On the otherhand, only 10 Flammhetzers were ever built. So, shouldn't BTS have modeled the Flammpanzer B1 (f) rather than the Flammpanzer 38(t)? BTS fix this or do somefink

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>III. Thou shalt not take the name or traditions of the Peng Challenge Thread in vain nor shall thee hold anyone guiltless who takes the name or traditions of the Peng Challenge Thread in vain.<hr></blockquote>

The traditions were created in a drunken haze and can be changed at the lifting of a quart. How can I trod on your sacred traditions? I know! I fully acknowldge Slapdragon, Ronin Yojimbo Knight

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>IV. Remember the place of the Peng Challenge Thread and keep it upon the first page.<hr></blockquote>

Feh! Let it slip to page two, or better yet, let it slip away enirely

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>V. Honor the Olde Ones, the Seniour Knights, the Knights and the Squires … ignore the Serfs and vilify the SSNs.<hr></blockquote>

Hell, this is an easy one... by your own traditions vilify everyone

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>VI. Thou shalt not be here without that thee challenge a person.<hr></blockquote>

Yeah Idiot? When was the last time you challenge someone?

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>VII. Thou shalt not sound off without thy pair.<hr></blockquote>

Correctly stated as Sound off like ya got a pair! Try to not misquote R Lee Ermey in the future

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>VIII. Thou shalt not sound off ABOUT thy pair, nor about politics, nor racial, sexual nor ethnic crusades.<hr></blockquote>

And I say Bauhaus has as much right to be here as anyone

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>IX. Thou SHALT give false testimony about thy fellow CessPoolers, and give them gamey play and insults and bile and taunts.<hr></blockquote>

Guess I'll have to give true testimony... Mace is a sheepshagger, Shaw is an idiot, Peng is a drunken sod, Seanachai is a gnome...

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>X. Thou shalt not covet thy fellow CessPoolers record, for wins and losses are not OF the CessPool.<hr></blockquote>

Why not? This is a Ladder after all

Sod Off

[Slapdragon]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Berlichtingen:

Lots of high wisdom snipped... The traditions were created in a drunken haze and can be changed at the lifting of a quart. How can I trod on your sacred traditions? I know! I fully acknowldge Slapdragon, Ronin Yojimbo Knight

Sod Off<hr></blockquote>

Slapdragon tips his hat to his mentor and factotum de factorum Berlichtingen and offers him the first game of his career as a cesspool knight. Slapdragon suggests to Berli that they play his "Ass-Fault Wheelie Duel" scenario for a small diversion.

On the other hand he (to use the imperious third person) seriously wants to know if anyone lives close enough to Joe and is willing to run by his place for a few dollars and get some pictures of him projectile vomitting on the screen. While Joe may be sturdy enough to survive a good long Bren Tripod discussion, he surely has been mortally wounded with Berlichtingen's latest move.

Finally, as the newest knight of the cesspool, Slapdragon is looking for a squire to do some shatting upon. How about Spook, want to make that Ulcer of Joe's twice as big?

Berli, you want the set up for Ass-Fault Warriors this weekend?

[Moriarty]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Leeo:

You all make me hate you. It's not that I want to hate, it is only the fact that you are so deserving of ire that forces me to the road more harsh. That, and the fact that you're a bunch of wussies.<hr></blockquote>

Hate is such a nice, clean emotion ... much befitting a nice little Pishpoot (all rights reserved by OGSF) like you. Now, go away and play with the other children, boy-o.

[Berlichtingen]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Slapdragon:

Berli, you want the set up for Ass-Fault Warriors this weekend?<hr></blockquote>

At your leasure

[Gyrene]

Hey Berli, by the way, you win.

Gyrene

[Moriarty]

Time for a wee update.

Not that anyone gives a hoot, a woot or a toot, he valiant forces ineptly led by yours truly have

X. Achieved a draw against the evil minions of Berllichtingen on a small but fun battle concocted by Germanboy. Obviously, judging from the outcome, it was far too easy for the Allies (me) to deal with the feldgraus commanded by Him. A more competent commander would have squashed him like a bug.

~1.b – Lost to that gamey, sumnabatchin', haggis-spewing OGSF. Started out with some foolishness in Goanna's winter wonderland and was kickin' the snot out of the Gobbler himself when the turns were no more.

1z2b. Graciously allowed Senility to save face by forgoing the end-game rush and walk away with a draw.

P2.5xz3. In ongoing games, Bauhausmouse started off with a terrific run of good luck and I am now kicking the bejeezus out of his feeble forces; no contact against OGSF in a new game; am under vicious assault from the Army of Peng, whose commander is using verrrry grog-like tactics (gamily leading his armor with infantry, bounding overwatch, etc., etc., ad nauseam; am luring the forces of jdmorse to certain destruction; am patiently awaiting for the forces of Joe Shaw to emerge from a deep gulley in one of the longgggessstt battles ever fought (Dunbar would be so proud of our ability to extend the length of our lives by playing this scenario, while Yossarian later will try to imitate us); Senility is still cowering; Steve the Rat has walked right into my trap and will pay dearly; and lastly, that little whelp Treeburst is pounding the absolutely crap out of my green and conscript Volksturms in the "Fatherland" scenario created by that raviing lunatic Mensch.

edited to fix that durned bolding thingy.

[ 11-08-2001: Message edited by: Moriarty ]</p>

[OGSF]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Slapdragon:

Slapdragon tips his hat to his mentor and factotum de factorum Berlichtingen and offers him the first game of his career as a cesspool knight.<hr></blockquote>

Aye, ye chatterin' wee snot gobbler, ye're a legend ain ye ain lunchtime alright. Mind af'n Ah call ye Scum Sucking Squire? Ah thought not. Wah didnye an' ye dictotum de rectum prance hand ain hand off tae tha furthest closet an' snigger aboot ye "promotion".

Ah'd challainge ye tae a wee gam, boot ye noo worthy. An' Ah'd challainge tha velvet an' lace pimp o' your's, but Ah alraidy kicked hais spotty arse.

Sae, poot on ye fingers an' sniff at.

SirMacOberGruppenBloodyStompinSicFeuhrerBastardABCDJimmy

Edited fer extra 'nips

[ 11-08-2001: Message edited by: OGSF ]</p>

[Simon Fox]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Slapdragon:

...Chief pisser offer of Simon Fox...<hr></blockquote>

Consider your "offer" disrespectfully declined. Suggest you give more attention to clause VIII of Bilbo's opening diatribe.

[BFCElvis]

Wankers.

[Lawyer]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Leeo:

I've been hurt by far better than you.<hr></blockquote>

Quite true. I am far better. And I'm applying large portions of hurt to Leeo. He's so rattled that he dropped his Harry Potter Secret Decoder Ring in the outhouse and had to go diving to retrieve it.

[Slapdragon]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Simon Fox:

Consider your "offer" disrespectfully declined. Suggest you give more attention to clause VIII of Bilbo's opening diatribe.<hr></blockquote>

Gee Simon, that is so subtle no one will be able to figure out what you are talking about including me! So I will just assume it is incredibly relevant, very insightful and witty, timely, and even slightly humorous, and clap my hands in appreciation. Or perhaps I will just say sod off (assuming that is not an ethnic slur).

Berli, the set up is coming later this evening.

[ 11-08-2001: Message edited by: Slapdragon ]</p>

[Berlichtingen]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Gyrene:

Hey Berli, by the way, you win.<hr></blockquote>

Err... what are you talking aboot?

[BFCElvis]

Lawyer, the idea of checking out an operation or scenario to see if you want to play it isn't done by actually playing it against the AI.

[Joe Shaw]

I must admit lads, I never thought I would see the day that one of the Olde Ones would forsake the traditions of the Peng Challenge Thread, the Mutha Beautiful Thread, the CessPool merely for the sake of REVENGE!

The concept that one of the annointed (having Peng pour a beer on his head counts doesn't it) would put his own personal desire for retribution above the good of the 'pool was, frankly, beyond my ken (and my Barbie too, mind she looks mighty fetching all shackled like that in "Barbie's Disco Dungeon").

What say you Peng and Seanachai? Are we to let this assault upon all we hold dear (no Bauhaus you needn't let go unless you want, just ... just don't stand up okay) go unchallenged? Or shall I take up the cudgel of the Justicariate of the Peng Challenge Thread and settle this matter like a CessPooler by thrasing Berli to within an inch of his life?

Should I win (as is CLEARLY the most likely outcome), he will recant all of his heresies ... and let's face it ... that's what he WANTS to do, in his heart of hearts (HEART Bauhaus HEART, you must try to listen more closely), but his hatred and fear of me (due entirely to my recent overwhelming victory over him) has led him astray.

Should HE win (after all it is possible that another poor scenario design MIGHT lead to my failure, such things CAN happen), he will then be reconciled and can then recant his heresy. Sounds like a Win/Win to me.

The decision is yours, Olde Ones but I urge you to make haste lest this affliction spread. The unfortunate choice of an Olde One cannot remain unchallenged.

I'll not address him directly for fear of my just wrath overcoming me. If you decide FOR my proposal I'll appoint a second to deal with the ... gentleman.

Joe

[Gyrene]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>By Berlichtingen: Err...what are uou talking aboot ? <hr></blockquote>

That Canadian fiasco I played against you. It dawned on me I never sent the surrender file. I shredded and buried the turn files in shame.

Gyrene

[**YK2**]

Pfffffffffftttttttt